"There are 7 billion people on the earth. You will find one for you too."
This is probably one of the silliest quotes I have ever heard. Whenever someone said something similar to me in the past, I always answered in my head, "No, I will not." At least not like that. Because even there are billions of people in the world, we would still be lonely, we all are a different, diverse human being with our own thoughts and priorities.
It's not possible to approach everyone we are being around, not even our closest one sometimes. And most of the time we don't want to do that either.
As an extreme introvert, I know the pros and cons of being lonely. I do not always complain about it, most of the time I'm okay with it. But yes, there are some times, when I feel like I need someone beside me, mentally and emotionally.
If you ask me, "Why are there so many people who are lonely?", then my answer would probably be, "Because we all are different" and not all are ready to make real connections with others.
For me, we need someone to be on our side but not always can keep up with that. Because of our difference. There are some times when we can't even stand our spouses, what else we ask from any outsider then?
Moreover, the changing societal norms, mental health issues, narcissistic mentality, and probably technology too don't let us make real connections with people. People think it's better to be lonely rather than to deal with differences. They probably think, as there are so many options to keep ourselves busy with, we don't need real friends anymore!
We have to agree that it became harder to make real connections nowadays. We fail to keep our old relationship so many times that we fear making any new one.
Our social anxiety is on the top ceiling. Digital communication took away the emotion of being attached to someone. We are not into making deeper connections and finding common interests. With people, we only discuss surface-level topics like the weather or their jobs, no?
I believe, our busy lifestyle and fear of rejection play a big role here too.
On top of everything, I believe, we fail to make friends, to make real connections because we don't want to. Because of fear, because of anxiety, ego, and all other things. We feel the need to be in a relationship with friends or partners but we fear being that committed. We set out our own priority that evolves around us. Our brain became numb to making short-term relationships rather than being committed to making them long-term.
No matter what it is, there's no argument that at the end of the day, we need someone. No one likes to be lonely, to feel lonely all the time. And I can guarantee, no one will enjoy it for an infinite amount of time.
Trust me, it's better to go out of your comfort zone and be with people.
People are the problem but the solution is within them too.
Photo: Made with Canva.
Have a good day, everyone.
I really enjoy your writing here. I simply have to agree with you and all your points. 👍🙏
Thanks a lot for saying so.
We weren't created to be alone! Sometimes, solitude is an awesome thing and I believe we all need a certain amount of being alone. We were however, meant to need one another, and yes, I do believe you hit that nail on the head-technology has made it easier to not commit because it's much easier to type a text to someone you've never meant than go out on a limb and establish any kind of relationship with them. It's much safer. Fear does hold us back.
Everything you mention does play a role. I also think you are right; we need to step out of the comfort zone we've all built and go for it.
Thanks for sharing and have a lovely day! !LADY
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I totally agree with you, time to time we need some alone time. When we built and practice to keep the line between being lonely and being alone successfully, that's when we become free from the fear.
Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts. Have a great day.
You are most welcome! Take care!
I've gotten used to being a loner what seemed decades already, raising my sons, supporting my household, paying the bills, looking after my mother's affairs, meeting financial goals, etc. It's a busy life for me and so little time to socialize. We do still need to socialize at some level, technology finds ways to do that but at a surface level. How deep that depends on how willing to go beyond our own comfort zones.
💙
I can relate so much to you on this. Things are going almost similar here so many family and personal responsibility that I don't get much time socializing and hangout with friends. But every now and then we need to fill this need and that's what I try to do nowadays.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Have a good day.
Haha it's funny how most of the ladies that have written for this topic are kind of introverts... I'm not excluded lol.
Well, I agree with you on that reason that we just don't want to and that is why we don't make connections sometimes... But then, it's important we do.
Good perspective by the way, thanks for participating and all the best!
Probably because, most of us did relate to this topic so much that we couldn't resist to write about it lol
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Have a great day.
Very valid points we are all different!! It's not easy for some to explore personalities in others. Rejection and fear of failure can weigh us down on stepping forward in relationship or even just looking for one. Finding an acceptable partner can be a difficult, how many qualities or traits are we looking for? Do we accept a few or do they need to check off all are boxes?
Loneliness is a horrible feeling. Sometimes even with a partner we still feel it. Love at the wrong time with the wrong person curse. Your right about stepping out of comfort zone to take chances. I'll just add we can't be desperate and take in the first person we get to know to fill that void. It's a fine line we need decide, kind of like pros vs cons, it's not often we find the perfect match no matter how many millions of people are out there.
I truly agree with you. It's never possible to find the perfect match. Seems like we are in a point in general where we are not much flexible to compromise and accept other's difference as well.
After a certain age, or I would say when we hit mid age; we fail to give that much effort to keep a relationship and that's understandable.
I hope things would be like old school but that's never possible. We still can make things better with some effort though.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Have a great day.
I very much agree with everything you say in your post, especially because it is true that people prefer to entertain themselves with others and not make a real connection with someone who allows them to talk about something deeper than the weather, because it is the easy and nobody wants to commit you to the depth of being human, but in the end, even those of us who feel social anxiety need others
!LADY
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That's sad. But at the same time that's the output of our actions and lifestyle.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Have a great day.
Found myself nodding with every point you made here. And even cracked up on reading this:
And it's very true so no argument there. And like you said, we don't make real connections because we choose not to. But at the end of the day, we still need others and we have to go out of our way to have that real connection.
!LADY
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Hahaha... That's a real life example, you know 🤭
Yes, we are not committed and even if we are, it's hard to find another committed one. That's the problem.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Have a great day.
Haha yes, that's why I LOL on reading that part :)
Thank you too for your wonderful thoughts !LADY
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We are all different and yes it is true that we may not be able to connect with many around us, but at the same time, there will always be a tribe that resonates with us. We just need to find that tribe and settle in there.
I totally agree with you. There is always something in common among us, we need to find them and make the effort to find them.
Thanks for your thoughtful comment. Sorry for the late reply, I was away from Hive for a while.
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I see you're still using the ocd tag. No need for that, you can choose a more suitable one as you're not writing about the ocd project.
Noted.
I removed the tag.
Thanks.
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