Okay so I've been avoiding the whole Christmas post thing and summing up my year - blah blah. But now I'm on the cusp of new year, I can't help but articulate a few goals for the new year. Not resolutions as much as reminders of the assertions we've made over the last few months. And of course, it's lovely to share it with the ladies of this wonderful blogging platform I'm writing on called HIVE. Want to write down your goals to share? Read this post and join in the community.
Early this morning I had a horrific dream where I woke up crying - like, pillow wet sobbing. I'd dreamt I was at work and they'd told us that in a week's time, we had to wear professional clothes. Crisp white ironed shirts, pencil skirts and collared jackets. I was so angry. It felt like an injustice. Why the short notice? Where would I get the money to buy such attire? Why couldn't I just go as me? No one seemed to care. 'It's not a big deal really', consoled a friend. But it was to me. I felt as if I was forced into a skin that wasn't mine, and if I took at stand and wore what I wanted, I'd stand out and be even more of an outsider, yet again. The feeling of frustration and anger at the injustice of this was the exact feeling I got as a kid when I was bullied, and I couldn't put a name to it.
Can you imagine my relief, listening to the rooster crow at dawn and the magpies warble, as I realised I wasn't going back to work, because I had quit?. It took me a good five minutes before I could properly breath.
It was a real struggle quitting - those who've followed my blog will know that I worried about money, security, my identity and self worth. Once I made the decision, things got a little easier. In the last few weeks, it's settled on me. I've quit, and things are going to be okay. More than okay. Because once we made that psychological decision (I say we, because my husband was instrumental in helping me do this), the sky became the limit.
I wanted J. to continue working - which he promised to do - because we don't have a lot of superannuation, or savings, and we need cash flow to pay the bills and basically survive. He was fine with this, but still I worried. Was it making him happy? I knew it wasn't, despite the brave face he was fronting to the world. Teaching wears you down. He'd give anything to go back to odd jobs and time to do projects and just enjoy life.
The other day he said he woke up and realised he might only have another twenty years left.
And I realise how much I'd awoken too. How much I'd let go of. Together we've been planning this escape to Tasmania - having this beautiful block of land with (maybe) water frontage and building the dream tiny home, with the big shed and the garden. Finding our dream place.
Yesterday a friend of a friend popped over to pick up some camp mattresses from us. He'd lived in Tassie a few years with his wife and loved it. They talk about moving there all the time. It didn't take long talking to us before he said that we seemed like the perfect people for the area we were looking - a bit alternative, creative and passionate about nature. He gave us a heap of tips that made me want to take the risk and move over immediately.
It's a long road there - we have a lot of logistics to get our heads around, but a year ago, I would never have even contemplated this move. It would seem far to risky. Now, it just seems like the only choice to truly live the life we want to live.
So this post is a new year's resolution, to hold fast to that idea. Throw out over caution like fairy dust to the warm wind, lace up my boots and step boldly into the rest of my life.
I also want to:
- study herbalism via a solid online course
- grow lots of mushrooms and perhaps think of a business there
- up my photography skills
- become better at crypto
- aim for 5 HIVE posts a week and continue to help build community
- get back to studio yoga
To all you HIVERS who have laughed, cried, sworn, rejoiced, worried and loved with me this year, to you I wish all the beauty and joy of the world in 2022. Thankyou for world building with me. Thanks for being the special, creative, amazing people that you are. Can't wait to share my adventure with you next year, and to read about yours! Take care and lots of love - see you on the other side! Oh, and I'm to invite one more woman to join in this challenge - @traisto, I keep thinking of you as you're new to this platform! If you're too late for this one, I recommend these challenges for the Ladies of HIVE community - it's a nice way to get to know people. I'd also love to invite dear @mamrita.
With Love,
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Wishing you an amazing 2022 @riverflows
No to those white shirts and pin skirts in dreams or 3D ;D
Absolutely not!!! And best of everything to you and your family as well!! 💖🌺💖
Oh, I cannot tell you how much I love your story @riverflows! It makes my heart sing to see you, or anyone, follow their own inner guidance, leading to their dreams. You will do great things. I just know it. Thank you so much for sharing. You have perhaps unwittingly inspired others to do the same 💝 Much love!
@lizablove(1/1) gave you LUV.
Awww shucks. You know a few people have said similarly, that they've felt inspired by my decision! Which was humbling, but also sent more confidently on my way!!! Happy new year!!
I don't see 'tickle @litguru' anywhere on that list. Shaking me head. 🤭
Happy New year, Australia!
Did you not get the tickle?? I sent it last year!!
🤣✨
I enjoy your writing sooo much! It gives me food for thought, it makes me feel so many things, it makes me laugh, you are a true inspiration!
It is funny how dreams work. You are opening wings and ironed collared threats appear :)
I love your grounded list, simple goals nothing fancy, but all of them aiming to built a stronger version of you!
I can't say how much grateful I am for your support! It means the HIVE world to me :) And more than this, it is always great to meet beautiful caring people!
As I said to the last challenge of the minimalistic one million you invited me in, "When @riverflows asks, I response", haha! I think I am going to make it tomorrow!
As for Tassie, I believe it is going to be great, and anyway what's life without taking risks? I wish you an abundant happy new year! Beauty and happiness! And herbs and mushrooms :)
Ah you are too kind. Yes, without risk, how do you KNOW!!! THANKS for your lovely words 💕😘💕😘 may the coming year, on and off HIVE, be amazing for you both!!
Hope you both get to move to Tassie this year and a hope it's a great year ahead.
Thanks so much xx
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💖💖🌺🌺💖💖
I'm sorry to hear about what you have experienced. 2021 has been a tough one for many and I hope you had a happy and peaceful Holiday season. The year 2022 looks promising. I'm looking forward to the new year ahead and everything that it will bring us.
Thanks for being a great inspiration on Hive. The effort and enthusiasm you put into building our community are greatly appreciated.
Thanks for the entry and May all your new year wishes come true ❤️❤️
I applaud you for taking the risk, both in quitting work and contemplating this new move. It's not easy to do life changing decisions, but as I've grown older I've realized-you don't necessarily get all the time you think you have to finish your life as planned. Taking the plunge is invigorating, scary and having faith that it will all work out. Best of luck to you! Take care and have a very Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!
My best wishes for your new adventures :)
I hope you find the perfect place in Tassie in 2022 and J finds a job he loves. I am glad you quit yours, it was tearing you apart.
Happy New Year!
Awesome River, I wish you all the best with your proposed move to Tasmania, now is the time for this kind of life shift as the world goes through its own changes.
Having to dress up smartly for work in your dream sounds challenging. I hope you can continue to feel fine being yourself and not having to wear a mask lol.
Dear @riverflows,
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I wish you all the best for 2022! Have a Happy New Year!
I root for you in this new beggining 💓 sounds scary and WONDERFUL. Don't you agree that, when we quit the normal, more like the monotony of the same routine, our brain just starts living in the present, adjusting to everything and we seem to live easily and joyful again?
I'm sure 2022 will be a lovely adventure for you 💛
You'll get there. It all seems so very right to you. I thought I'd found my place. Maybe I have. But that I am hesitant makes me wonder. I want to be sure, pure love at first sight.
May 2022 find us all standing in the blaze of pure love!
Weeeee Happy 2022 to you, J. and Buttercup!
Very exciting! Can’t wait to see what 2022 holds for you! Love your list of goals for growth.
Wow, this is really good writing my friend ❤️ And what an intense dream! I really do believe you will make it to Tasmania and that you will find the perfect new home there 🙂
I was gone on a retreat over New Year's so I missed this challenge and now I'm actually sick (might be covid but could be anything really) but I actually don't have any resolutions. I have a word though for 2022, change. I contemplated this and it just felt aligned for me (I usually have a word for a new year).
xx