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I still wanted to help, but I wasn't willing to keep hurting myself to do it.

That's the balance. Helping someone shouldn't require you to constantly abandon your own needs.

I also learned that being appreciated matters almost as much as being useful.

Nobody wants to feel like they're only valuable because of what they can provide

And sometimes you can genuinely do your best and still not meet someone's expectations

Which doesn't automatically mean you failed. Sometimes you're simply not the person who can give them what they want

I wish I'd understood that earlier because I spent too much time blaming myself.