You know what, I understand you. I recently began to come out of my shell after losing trust in people due to a robbery 5 years ago. I'd won a fellowship to study in Germany, and while I was there, the manager and janitor of my building told everyone that I'd died in a plane crash and they took almost everything out of my unit and sold them on tables in front of my building.
What really hurt is that these were people (all parolees), who I'd fed when they had no food, and I'd even helped to pay their rent so they would avoid being evicted. I did a lot of good in that building and I was never compensated for the looting of my property.
What also hurt was losing things that had sentimental value, as they threw out anything that didn't sell knowing I was returning in early 2018 after 5 months in Germany.
I lost the ONLY video of my beloved late grandmother (she was dancing in it), that I'd shot with an old camera and had planned to digitize and backup upon my return.
So when I returned, I had nothing but the clothes on my back and had to start over.
It's one of the reasons I don't have a large account here on Hive, as I also care for an elderly ill relative on top of that.
This robbery left a burning hatred of parolees inside of me as well as a deep distrust of people in general. Combine that with the pandemic that I found out about in late 2019 on a US expat forum (I was planning to study in China in 2020), and you have the perfect mix to withdraw from the world.
So I get it.
Only now am I taking the first tenative steps to re-ingage with those around me. Broken trust can take time to heal, but heal it does. Stay Strong.
Very honest and truthful words...
The friends here on hive that are willing to invest in each other here are very empowering.
Damn. The best people get taken advantage of the worst.
Yeah. But you know what? I believe in a higher power and am confident that they will answer for what they did. Someone once told me that "We wouldn't know we were good unless bad people were around as contrast to us."
I also know that everything happens for a reason. The robbery prevented me from returning to that building where we lost many residents to COVID in 2020, so that old saying about every cloud having a silver lining might just be true.
Man that sucks a big egg. I do hope you find trust in others again just as I am finding a way out into the world again. For me it is not so much a matter of trusting people, it is believing in myself again.