I had an idea to do a little series of posts about things I've learned and applied to my personal and professional life. I'll keep these posts quite short but hope someone reads something they can fit into their own life or they can use to good effect.
Phrases to live by
I'm always looking to improve rather than ways to be perfect because continual improvement offers the chance for more tangible (and attainable) results that come more often; besides, perfection doesn't exist, especially so for humans.
Anyway, here's some of the things that help me continually improve and that I've lived my life by:
- Never beg for a relationship or friendship, be the person who people want to be engaged with and if they don't want to then simply move on; your time is better spent elsewhere.
- If you're not invited then do not ask to be included.
- Listen intently, smile genuinely and make appropriate eye contact.
- Speak honestly and plainly, "say what you think and mean what you say."
- Ask more than you answer, you'll learn more.
- Dress well, and appropriately, and take care of your overall appearance, it shows quality.
- Never take credit or accolades for work you didn't do; it's ugly.
- Stand up for the weak or those who cannot stand up for themselves even should it put you in harms' way.
- Never shake hands while sitting, stand and show due respect.
This is, of course, nowhere near a full list, just a few items that I believe are valuable traits and behaviours and which speak volumes about the quality of a person, or lack thereof.
Design and create your ideal life, tomorrow isn't promised - galenkp
[Original and AI free]
Image(s) in this post are my own
Agree absolutely, but I can't help to think if culture plays a part in it, and some people think it's ok because it's in their culture or country's norm. Just like handing out business cards, it's a big deal in Asia, particularly in Japan, where it's a massive deal. In UK, I've seen people slide their business card across the table in business meetings, or just throw somebody else's business card in their own bag when leaving a meeting. So rude
For sure culture plays a part and when in a country, no matter which, some effort should be made to understand it and fit in. Accepting a business car with two hands and taking a moment to study it respectful is the accepted norm in some countries and it doesn't seem all that hard to do...but in others, sticking it straight into the pocket without a glance is just acceptable. Horses for courses.
I rarely buy new clothes. But recently I bought new pants and may buy a few shirts in the future.
This reminded me something.
Back in the school days I really liked one girl. it was her birthday so I went and bought her some flower(s?). At the time when I gave it to her she was siting in school desk so some teacher told her that she should stand up while getting flowers from me.
Memory works in mysterious ways I guess.Yep, it shows respect to stand in certain situations.
I know you can add many more, but with these every one can reflect and analyze his/her conduct. It is very interesting how by these days I was close to incur in the second red flag you suggest here. I am in for all. Yet, I think that dressing well is difficult to some people struggling with money. How we define that someone is well-dressed? (I understand by default you are not talking about dressing Armani) However, I think people should always have this issue in the top, looking for ways to look "clean". If not with the best dress in terms of quality, at least with the best suited for looking as better as possible. As it is said: "poor but clean".
I think the "dressing well" comment is less about buying designer clothes and more about presenting as best as one can as often as one can; it's not just clothes either, it's personal grooming as well.
I understood well your point here. Yet I think that the dressing part of this topic, in practical terms, is highly assessed in our interactions, and so many people will not be able to produce a good visual impact in certain social settings. That's a (sad) fact. Thanks for your feedback.
Good choices, I have already put some of them into practice and others made me reflect, but the truth is that what struck me most about what you wrote is the first thing you say, to seek continuous improvement and not perfection; I am already doing this without realizing it, but I wasted so much time in the past trying to make everything perfect, how silly! At least many situations made me open my eyes.
Thank you for this Dr. Galenkp 🙏 (Doctor because you always make me reflect with your writings) 😅
Well done because seeking perfection is a fools errand and rarely goes well. The sooner people learn that the better. I'm glad you find something to like and some value to take away when you read my posts.
that thing of the handshaking came always natural to me, i always stand
the first 2 points are about self-respect, dont knee to others, if they don't deserve you, don't bother
at work i never really dress well, simply because i hate that place and the boss didn't behave well with me, so i dress at random without taking care, like they don't deserve i spend time and effort for a good appearance for them... weekend is an other story
It's always a choice on how to present (clothes, grooming etc.) and I learned from my parents that presenting well is more about myself than others. It's about self respect. I have always worked towards presenting well whether I'm going to the hardware store, going shooting, to a black tie event...doesn't matter what others think because I dress for myself and those who do, like my girlfriend. Of course, dressing appropriately matters...so I don't wear a tuxedo to the hardware store, or bathers when I go shooting etc.
That's the exact same words my parent says, to do it for yourself not the others
Smart parents.
I like your ideas,
Let me add a little to one of your ideas
When you are not invited don't ask to be included, when invited late, decline it.
Why would you decline it when invited "late"?
When planning for an occasion, the key people will be listed out and later will be sent to them for invitation and if your name is not included that means you are not that important to them that's why they omit your name at first.
If the later is then sent to your late, prove to them that you are busy decline it and tell them that you had another appointment elsewhere.
Is better to stay in your house and enjoy yourself than to go to an occasion that your are just a substitute
Turning down an invite for this reason sounds like a very childish and limiting behaviour.
It seams childish to some people well
I don't see it that way
"I'm always looking to improve rather than ways to be perfect" I like this phrase of yours🫶 That's a fantastic mindset! Focusing on improvement is much healthier and more sustainable than striving for an unattainable perfection. It allows for growth, learning, and a more positive outlook. 🫶