Very interesting read. It definitely got my brain thinking this morning.
Since human beings are a social species it makes me wonder if there truly are individuals who do not need/seek validation, in some way or on some level. In many cases the human ego simply adapts to an individuals new ideologies and ways of thinking in order to create new self illusions that bolster their identity toward believing that they are unique in some way. For instance, individuals who consider themselves non-conformists often engage in hyper conformity without even realizing it. Goth individuals may dress or act differently from the mainstream in order to rebel against society or to be considered unique and different. But in actuality those individuals are just conforming to a new non-mainstream subset of society. This same concept can be seen over and over again in society in nearly every facet of life it seems. Ex. people calling others "sheeple" for watching the news or listening to the mainstream narrative while simultaneously regurgitating ideas that they have heard from other sources. During covid people who were for the vaccine banded together under one ideology that held a set of guiding principles and information, and then people who were against the vaccine also banded together but under a different set of principles and information. Both human behaviors were fundamentally the same just with different ideologies to justify them. The only difference in a lot of these cases is just population size. When the population is small individuals tend to believe that they are more unique in their thinking. In very extreme cases, like people who are ostracized from society, those individuals often turn to other individuals who have also been ostracized by society and they form new groups among themselves. These relationships are often online but can grow to be very large numbers. Flat earth societies would be an example, or those that believe that secret societies control the world. Even internet trolls may be considered another example of people banning seeking validation from others in society.
These things make me wonder if there actually are instances where people do not need validation from others? If not from society, what about friends, family, ones children or a spouse?
PS. This is not meant to be argumentative so I hope that it didn't come across that way. I'm just sharing my thoughts and posing questions because I do not know the answers.
Thank you for your comment @leaky20 ! I know exactly what you mean, and indeed, each group had its 'truth' - to use your example - but of the two, there had to be a better one, i.e. one that was more desirable for human beings, their health, their autonomy and respect for their being - body, soul, spirit - their choice of conscience. Perhaps this truth was also a mixture of both. But what happened was an unprecedented attack on freedom and, basically, your comment makes me discover that I didn't really talk about what was at the heart of my point - even though I did of course sketch it out - i.e. the risk we take in wanting to be authentically free (even if I see this without idealism, I do think we can be free and live in society at the same time).
I think that this kind of freedom, lived or aspired to, makes these people truly unique in a way that is no longer common or - unfortunately - very widespread. Many claim to belong to a family or a sub-group of thought, but deep down the majority borrow this as a disguise. It's like the anarchist t-shirts that sell for exorbitant prices, that's always made me laugh a lot, and it's just another form of church and passion for decorum and not for values as such.
Basically, I think that more than being validated by our loved ones in general, it's understood that we wish to be.
Thanks again for your reply ! And don't worry, I only took that one really well :)
Finding the right balance (a subjective experience unique to every individual) between self freedom and society, would be an ideal scenario I think. :)
I agree on that ! Responsable and caring human beings would be great too, but unbridled capitalism has come a long way ^^
Have a good new week @leaky20, hope you enjoyed your weekend ✌️