Tools to be well.

Hello friends of this great community; Today I would like to talk to you about our downturns, how we are sad for no apparent reason, because sometimes we feel bad for being bad and we demand a lot from ourselves, we demand a lot from ourselves, questioning why we are bad, since we have no reason to be bad, I wanted you to start to normalize a little the fact that life is a little like that.

And I mention this so that you can dissociate the fact of thinking that, because we have self-control of our emotions or because we have self-knowledge, we cannot suffer, we cannot be sad for no reason, we cannot feel frustrated, feel small, crestfallen at times, because that is part of life.

When I talk about this process of understanding, of looking at ourselves, of embracing the sometimes sad moments that we can have and that we can go through, that is part of life, it is part of being upset when a relationship ends, it is part of being upset when we lose our job, when something happens to us, when we get frustrated, we decorate and glamorize happiness too much, love too much, we decorate the purpose too much, as if the purpose had to be something a miraculous encounter with what we came to do in this life or believing that love has to be that uncontrollable, passionate love that we are going to live eternally.

And that connection may be eternal, it may be, but it is not a guarantee. Or we also idolize happiness as if it were that I need to always be happy, I need that search for happiness, but it is not like that, when I am in a moment of depression and I feel like that, I talk with my sadness. "Are you sad? No, he tells me, well yes, but for no apparent reason."

And sometimes that's what it is, a melancholic day, a rainy day, a calm, cold day. When we normalize this, we actually distance ourselves from a self-demand to always be or always try to be happy. It is not necessary and it is not normal to always be happy.

It is important that you also keep this in mind because sometimes we create an image of being a good “court jester”, that we have to always be smiling and happy and sometimes not, sometimes I feel like being here calm, still, “it means that I am bad”, “it means that I want to disappear from the world, No.

If life were always that incessant search for great emotions, that is a reflection of the immaturity of our own self, if we always look for happiness, if we always look for dopamine, pleasure, I need to do this, I need to spend, I need to travel, I need passions, well in reality they are reflections that you do not know how to be happy with what you have and with what is simple.

You don't know how to connect a little with the boring, take time to have a quiet breakfast, a delicious breakfast and you know, feel that that is enough or sometimes be a little sad and sleep a little earlier and that is natural, real life is that. Sometimes we have no reason to be sad and we are. So, we accept it and stop demanding ourselves.

It's not because we're sad that we have to immediately look for happiness, you know? Sadness is a valid emotion, just like anger is also a valid emotion, like fear, they are all emotions that we go through. What is going to change, what is going to transform that emotion that we feel, is the dialogue that we have with those emotions, the emotions come, the thought comes and how we are going to dialogue is what is going to show our maturity.

If sadness sits here in my living room, I talk to it and say, "Hey, what's wrong with you?" "No, I'm just passing through." "Oh, okay, so you're leaving tomorrow, right? Hey, you're here longer than I thought. Isn't there something you want to tell me? Is there something we need to look at?" Well yeah, hey, I think we need to take care of your body a little more, you know? It's a bit of that dialogue.
Not despairing, not seeking happiness at any cost, not wanting to cover holes, that is the point I am referring to.

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