For the couple months, I have been sitting at the kitchen table when I am at the laptop. Not sure why, but it has been better than on the couch upstairs, as I found myself too distracted there. Tonight though, I am back on the couch and writing from my phone instead, because I don't do it often now and I am getting out of practice. I usually only have to when I am in a pinch or travelling somewhere without a laptop, but it is good to do from time to time because my "voice changes" when I write on the phone.
No, it doesn't get deeper or classier, and I don't have a high British accent, it just changes the way I write. It is because it puts my thoughts in a different environment and that shifts the way I think and express myself. It can also change the way I approach a topic.
A change is as good as a holiday.
Have you heard that saying? It is kind of true, but I think the change has to be something that brings value. Negative change isn't better than a holiday. However, I also think that if we are stick in sone way, we should look to change something. It doesn't have to be drastic like a job or a partner, bit just something that shifts our comfort levels and in so doing, our perspective. When we are comfortable with our situation (even if we don't like it), we become quite blind to what is actually happening.
I asked a question in another article today:
Is there no domain where people won't take the easy way?
I am not sure and yes, it depends on the person, but I feel most people want the easy way in most situations. Even the ones that they enjoy or are good at. People seem to be getting ever lazier, no longer able to pick themselves up to do even the simplest tasks. Automation, robots, AI, pills, larger clothes, makeup, gadgets, apps... The list is endless. Everyone trying to buy the result they want, rather than work for it.
And as said, even when the things might be enjoyable, people will rather take the easier way out, which is why there are so many people who aren't in committed relationships. Even so many who have given up on having sex at all, choosing a screen and an adult toy instead.
I think a lot of people have chosen to put themselves in a bubble of experience where they are comfortable, without considering what they are missing from outside their sphere. And many will justify the bubble life giving a multitude of sensible reasons, which pretty much all bubble down to fear.
Scared if getting hurt.
Scared if someone breaks my heart. Scared if someone says something I don't like. Scared if I see something that makes me uncomfortable. Scared to find out information that shatters my beliefs.
Living life, in fear.
What scares you?
Scared to miss out? Scared to get what you want? Scared that you are wrong, or that others are right? Scared to make a fool of yourself?
Scared that you are irrelevant?
We are all irrelevant.
And we are becoming more so. The only real relevance we have in this life is our relationships with others. You can argue all you want about it, but that is what it all boils down to. The less we appear in the lives of others, the less relevant we become. And we are on track to isolate and insulate ourselves from each other completely.
Out of fear.
We fear other people because they have power over us, if we let them have it. They have the power to disrupt our situation, our environment, and then we are forced to change. Then we are forced to shift our perspectives, assumptions, behaviours, beliefs. We'd rather skip the mess and live in a hermetically sealed bubble that has all the comforts we require.
But that bubble doesn't exist.
Eventually, the illusion bursts and reality comes flooding in, and there is nothing we can do to stem the tide. We are forced to face reality, and our own childish attempts to hold back the ocean with our hands. Our attempt to live in a fantasy world, reliant on others to maintain it.
Make yourself relevant.
This doesn't mean get attention. It means to be relevant in people's lives and hopefully, for the positive. Get your hands dirty building family, community, society and break your bubble world.
Who besides you is the most relevant person in your life? Are you the most relevant in someone else's?
Life is easy, unless you keep taking the easy path. Even sitting on the couch can become painful.
Taraz
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This may be something I struggle with. Being relevant. Yeah, I am relevant to my immediate family (wife and kids). But I need to be more present in the lives of others. Even if I can't drive, I can reach out occasionally and say hello. Ask them what has been going o ni ntheir lives. Look to be helpful in what little ways I can.
Perhaps being relevant in a tight-ish circle is good enough. A little wider than immediate family, and if everyone did it, everyone would be relevant with many overlaps.
Change is good when it is a Change of scenery. Staying in the same place is boring after a while. That is why I like traveling to different places like Hawaii...
Hawaii is different from Seattle for sure. :D
True that many people avoid discomfort, but facing it might help us grow and form stronger connections.
Do you ever go out of your way to disrupt yourself?
I do, by travelling alone😉
I think I would struggle a lot if I had to write a post on my phone. Like a full post and not just a comment. In fact, there is a good chance I would write a post ahead of time and just publish it when the time was right versus typing something up on the fly with my phone. I think it's more about he extra time it takes to put the thoughts into words on a phone versus on a computer.
This hits hard because so much of my early adult life was predicated on keeping things as easy as possible. I avoided jobs that would have me work more than 40 hr/wk and have me dress up in a suit and tie. I compromised on living conditions so I could work less demanding jobs. I spent over a year living out of my car and a storage locker while enjoying unemployment and trading Magic: The Gathering cards for a living. It was fun, but it was also isolating.
This is why I've enjoyed teaching. Surely, it isn't the toughest job. There is plenty of vacation and the average work day is shorter (although there is plenty of work expected to be completed outside of working hours if you're not careful). Best of all, I get to impact lives and build relationships every day. I have the opportunity to affect 100 lives for the better every year, daily. It is such a gift to hear from students 5, 10, 15 years later how one piece of encouragement, one piece of knowledge, or even one piece of perspective has changed their lives for the better. I'm grateful for my position to teach, because it is the easiest way for me to give back to society.
It’s easy to stay in our comfort bubbles because it feels safe, but real life and growth usually happen outside of them, especially through our relationships with others.