Greetings my dear Holos&Lotus community, I am pleased to be with you again with a beautiful and nostalgic theme at the same time, at least for me, in which the friend Rosahidalgo invites us to decipher and/or identify our love codes taking as guide three particular test tubes that shook me internally and I will share them because from my experiences; especially alluding to someone who didn't last long for me, but until now, is the only one who has known how to love me and also taught me to love.
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A mi que me toquen
to me that they touch me
Wow, with this topic I had inconsistencies since childhood, my mother was an abused girl and since I can remember I remember that she told me
Yunuary, ud no se me deje tocar por nadie y menos por un hombre, no señor!
Yunuary, don't let anyone touch me, least of all a man, no sir!
So I grew up with that paradigm of not letting myself be touched and a disastrous experience of lewdness on the part of a political uncle at the age of nine I reaffirmed it and reached my 18th year like this, without letting myself be touched by any man and drier to prove affection that a withered leaf with family and friends. But it turns out that when I was 18 years old I fell in love and since love can do anything, my boyfriend Juan José introduced me to the world of caresses with patience and dedication; I liked them, of course, so much that as my first love, it was my first everything; the man with whom I wanted to join my toothbrush for the years that remained to me and so we decided to do it
However, the presence of a lady with a nine-month-old girl in her arms, introducing me to the eldest daughter of the one who in two months would be my husband by law and church, made me angry again; yes I know I was wrong, but the pain and anger of that episode blinded me; the man I loved, had missed that little detail, telling me he had a wife and a pretty girl, things happen right? .
Then came Alberto, the father of my daughter, I spoke to you about the past dynamic, but regarding this issue I can tell you as my grandmother used to say: “the hunger and the desire to eat came together” because I did not want to give myself up for complete to the pleasure of caresses so as not to become attached as in the past, a way of putting on a protective shell and him; a country man, abandoned by his mother and raised by his father and grandmother, was not at all assiduous to caresses and when he did, I could not avoid the lack of tact and that combined with my post-traumatic attitude about it; Well, you can imagine that our caresses lacked seasoning everywhere.
Until you arrived, Oswaldo, my late husband; He literally showed me how sublime a caress is, he helped me release that feeling of guilt generated in my childhood for letting myself be touched and the bitter taste of betrayal that invaded my being when touched and did not allow me to give myself permission to enjoy something so wonderfully normal. His caresses were as if the tips of his fingers barely touched my skin, they were something so subtle that it seemed incredible to feel so much pleasure and you know what? I understood since then, that this was the form of caress that made me feel a loved woman and also the type of caress that I was pleased to give and together, we became one caressing each other without the need for elaborate phrases, or any guidance. In fact, the inveterate romantic as always made a dedication to me on Facebook about it.
Háblame suavemente:
speak softly to me
Here Oswaldo also comes out to shine. We met in a situation where I was very vulnerable; I was going to a rehabilitation center to adapt to my recently placed total hip and right femur replacement after N number of operations after my accident and I was still using a wheelchair; He visited the same center for a muscle tear in his left shoulder as a result of a misdirected exercise at the Gym and to make a long story short, with his warm voice and sweet words he was dispelling my discouragement due to my lack of movement. It was with words of encouragement, maturity and even wisdom that he conquered me and day by day he gained not only my affection, he became my unconditional support, my legs when I still couldn't use them and that faint voice, but at the same time courageous telling me: “come on, you can do it”. Never, in our six years together, did he raise his voice to me unless it was to shout I love you when he was saying goodbye to go to work or the loud music of some meeting prevented him from doing so and it was sublime to discover with whom, in intimacy, my feelings transport me. affectionate words in the ear. There is no doubt, speaking softly makes me fall in love.
Atención y tiempo
attention and time
In this field, I care much more about quality than quantity. A person can spend 24 hours a day with you and not pay you the slightest attention; while minutes dedicated to you can really make you so happy. Oswaldo was a prison guard and lasted up to 21 hours imprisoned with prisoners in a prison in a state located 4 hours from ours; but the dedication to showing me his interest in the five minutes a day that allowed him to call me, or write to me, was like feeling him all day with me.
It was quality care, focused on me and the things that were important to me, and that became totally reciprocal; Not to mention the 15 days that I was off work, we enjoyed our time together to the fullest, even the space that we agreed to give each other from time to time with friends; we enjoyed missing each other at that moment and we were fascinated by taking a little break in the bathroom to make a call and tell each other any jocosity; When we got home, we fell asleep very late telling each other the smallest detail. Time for me goes beyond hours and attention, beyond physical presence. To these three items I would add
Detalles:
Details:
And I'm not talking about expensive gifts, or based on materialism, no; I'm talking about those little giants that, although it sounds trite, come from the heart. Leaving you a few written lines when going to work telling you how great it feels to wake up next to you and reiterating how much he's going to miss you, it's fabulous (for example); appearing daily with a cookie, a sweet or a piece of paper that says: today I have no money, but a lot of love is something indescribable; bring you some of his work done with his own hands, anyway; even more so, that with those small-giants on a regular basis they teach detail to someone who did not have the slightest culture in this regard, understanding that the details are a powerful shower of love, like me! .
Alias cariñosos:
affectionate aliases:
I don't know if you have experienced it, but affectionate aliases give a personal touch and add value to the relationship in my particular opinion. In our case, we stopped being Yunuary and Oswaldo to be: “My angel”. I attributed it to him for coming into my life at the most difficult moment and being that unconditional support and him; He was referring that he arrived when he had just decided not to bet more on love due to repeated disappointments; that I showed him that if you could love with sincerity. Believe me, far from being "cheesy" using this aliases with which you feel identified in your relationship, it feels nice.
Entrega incondicional:
Unconditional delivery:
Feeling that you are the priority of someone who is betting everything on you without expecting anything in return, is a privilege that few of us enjoy. My husband gave himself to me completely when I needed him most; he didn't mind having problems at work and being charged with extra guards for staying to take care of me in a hospital room when necessary; He didn't mind being my legs in my long time in rehabilitation and sacrificing his vacations so that my mom could rest, all this, without having a relationship as such; He didn't care about our 7-year age difference, or the mistreatment of my jealous 8-year-old daughter at first; much less the inevitable disability that remains in my right leg, nothing like that. He cared about loving me, making me happy as he did; But I guess I don't consider that the sudden brain aneurysm that took him away from me that afternoon in May 2019, nor do the doctors who were on medical strike that day and couldn't "care" for him; nor the government for not equipping Venezuelan hospitals.
Today I thank you, "my angel" for teaching me to love so beautifully, because even though I no longer remember you with pain because neither you, nor I, nor our love deserve a complicated mourning; moments like these, where for X or Y specific extraordinary circumstances I remember bring tears of nostalgia to my eyes that I can't stop. In all this time, I have not met someone in whom I can pour that way of loving that you taught me and that I now know, is the one that I like to give and receive; but if it is the will of God so be it; I know that someone will have to thank you without knowing it, how happy I am to do it with all the beauty I have to give and that by nature boomerang of life, I will also receive. See you always my angel.
Well my hiver friends, here I leave my experience about my love codes, sorry if I extended too much, but it is not easy to briefly talk about something so big for one. I invite @mariperez316, @mairimgo23 and yannet80 to join this fabulous dynamic.
All photos belong to me, from my gallery of facebook memories.
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Muchas gracias por su valioso apoyo equipo de curacion @enlace, Saludos cordiales!!
Definitivamente una historia de amor que te dejo unas enseñanzas hermosas, cómo bien lo dices es tu ángel, el que llegó a tu vida para ayudarte a sanar muchas heridas.
Eres una guerrera y has salido adelante siempre, me sorprende las cosas que has vivido y como las has afrontado.
Mis bendiciones para ti y todo lo bonito. 🙃😌🤗🌟💫🌞🎇🎆🙏🏻🙏🏻
Saludos amiga, un hermoso y motivador comentario; me han tocado pruebas difíciles como a todos en la vida pero las vivimos de distintas formas y escenarios; lo que si, es que agradezco a Dios por todas y cada una porque me ha dejado ver el propósito detrás de las mismas y me ha fortalecido. Un abrazo fraterno para ti.
Gracias por la invitación amiga.
Todo un placer mi bella amiga
Que hermosa historia de amor que te permitió rescatar ese encuentro con lo esencial, eres muy afortunada de haber tenido esa experiencia y espero en Dios que te mande otro angelito como Oswaldo (qepd)
@tipu curate 3
Amen mi estimada amiga y si, fue una Bendición de Dios conocerlo y experimentar un amor tan bonito! Gracias por tu apoyo y comentario
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Muchas gracias por su valioso apoyo. Saludos cordiales!
Hola, que bonita historia, solo queda guardar un lindo recuerdo y tal vez suene frío, pero es una realidad, la vida sigue. De todas tus experiencias, pues él llegó a tu vida para cambiar los paradigmas del amor y como bien dijsite, te enseñó a amar y a sentirte amada.
Si mi querida amiga, me costo entenderlo, pero se que la vida continua y Dios en su infinita misericordia y sabiduría sabe lo que hace. Gracias por el apoyo!
Que difícil y que única es tu historia, digna de mi admiración. Gracias por la invitación ❣️
Un placer invitarte amiga, tus publicaciones me gustan mucho. Gracias por el apoyo y comentario!
Se me hizo un nudo en la garganta al leerte. Muchas gracias por compartir tu experiencia, eres muy fuerte. Disfrutaste de unos códigos de amor como te lo mereces, lamento mucho que terminara así, sin embargo, sabemos que los designios de Dios siempre ocurren para fortalecernos. Abrazos
Hola mi estimada amiga, no hay mas que decir:
Tal cual como lo expresas es así! Saludos y Bendiciones linda!