Fair point re: attention-seeking. I think the will to live is still in there somewhere no matter how dark and close to pulling the trigger things get. It's all so extremely complex.
Not sure if that was supposed to be a semicolon or a colon there
I believe both are grammatically correct. The differences come down to emphasis and nuance. I think. I will now be spending the rest of the night reading about the historical development and current accepted usage of punctuation marks in the English language.
Sounds like a fun time. Let me know if you find the truth. If you discover anything good we can start our own religion based around semicolons and daylight savings time.