Ahhh yes, summer of 2017. It was the worst of times, it was the best of times. MediKatie and I were homeless when I signed up here 4 years ago, and didn't have a place to live until November. I had heard (about Steem) many times from other vloggers, and used a laptop and borrowed internet connection to sign up. I didn't want to wait until we were in a better situation, because I knew the sooner you start, the better your chances of "making it" here. Well after 4 years, I still have not made it here! I should never have touched this place with a ten foot pole. It's one of my only regrets in life. If I could do it all again, I would never ever sign up for this blockchain. No offense to anyone here, but it has been one of the worst decisions I ever made.
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Do you know what the average post payouts are, and what is considered "making it" on Hive?
Because even if you make $50.00 a post and post everyday, minus curation is less than $200.00 dollars per week, and if you cashed that out to survive on, you certainly will not continue making that much because we know how the voters want those votes back sometimes, and we know constant cash out is not the popular thing to do around here, regardless if someone really needs the resources to survive.
I came along Dec 2017 homeless on a laptop as well :D At the very start I wasn't but it was a drug house infested with mice and people doing hard drugs, nodding out in piles of garbage.. real bad, then willingly left to go to a homeless shelter cause I had to get the fuck out of there.
Why do you stick around if you regret it so much?
I would guess for the meaningful connections and things which no monetary value can be set for? :)
I hope you stay with it and also hope that it becomes a more positive and fulfilling experience for you bro.
Heheh yeah, there are a few meaningful connections, but to be honest I've met people on various platforms for the past 25 years, and kept in touch with essentially none of them. I don't know if I'm unusual that way, or if most people tend not to connect well with purely online friends? Not sure. And no offense meant to anyone, cuz it's not personal. Maybe I'm defective, who knows.
One (and perhaps the main) reason I'm still here though I regret it, is there's no good alternative (yet). I feel like I went the wrong way in a choose your own adventure book, but this is real life, and I can't go back (cheat), and I can't just die and start over. I'm doing the best I can with the mistake(s) I've made, I guess.
Another aspect is that I can't really get my funds out without a smart device and/or bank account and/or giving up my privacy. Crypto was supposed to be private and decentralized, and as I've documented many times, it has become everything BUT those 2 things! I'm looking for ways to do it that don't require things I don't have (bank account or smart device), and don't require me to do things I'm against. The hope is that something will come along for me (and millions like me who are waiting in the wings for real privacy and decentralization). So I'm kinda strung along hoping for that.
Then there's the price, I bough in at $4 or whatever it was at the start of 2018, blew all my BTC (0.2) on it. Seemed like the best idea ever, price was headed above $10 everybody said, etc etc. But as you know, STEEM (and HIVE) is inflating like a mofo, and the value does nothing but drop. This punishes holders and rewards people who earn and cash out. I've NEVER cashed out. So everything I've earned has been reduced by 95% or more in value. Why don't I just cash out and leave? It's complicated! But yeah, the price is probably part of it. Maybe if cashing out was actually going to get me back my 0.2 BTC I sent this platform 4 years ago, or pay me for the 4 years of full time effort I've put in, but that's not the case at the moment.
Note, some of the above factors are still in flux. Things keep changing. Maybe my stars will align at some point, I don't know. Maybe I should take what I can get, and run away now? Shrug. Dunno man! Dunno.
Thank you for the reply bro, and very nicely written too.
Crypto is really something man... My perception regarding the privacy and utility is right in line with yours.
I still use a Surveillance Monitoring Analytic Reporting Tracking device, minimally, but ohhh I know it's serving a purpose 24 hours a day, and have been considering a possible VOIP solution because all I really use it for is calls and texting people back who have an aversion to just calling..
During that time I was homeless I was buying some gift cards to trade for the pre fork crypto.., and after that with DeFi, had about 100X'd my investment(s).
Then I was scammed out of about $20,000 dollars worth of crypto 😀 and simply no longer care about the online equity I hold anymore, because my work for these past few years vanished in seconds, and there is a lesson to be learned here... (what is it what is it?)
Now I'm back blogging again and do not care what my posts make.
I don't have any specific goals with blogging anymore, other than perhaps bringing positivity, awareness, and wisdom to others.
I guess the lesson is that any sense of accomplishment, and sense of gain, any sense of material is all a perceptual illusion in a strange sense.
(example)
If I have an account with 1 million dollars in it, but I have no physical food to eat and cannot quickly turn that asset into food, what do I really have except for an illusion of security, and is that security real, or is the growling in my stomach real? 🤔
This would make for an interesting philosophical write up.
Things keep changing, my stars will align at some point, I know, I should take what I can get, and run. 😉🤗