So, what does your table look like?
"It's got conditional formatting."
I'm not sure I follow.
"Borders, data, formulae and conditional formatting."
Oh, you are talking about a spreadsheet table. I might go talk to a normal person.
"You mean a computer illiterate person like yourself."
I just wanted to know what was on your table.
"I answered. A perfectly reasonable answer. But you can go and ask someone else. Someone normal "
At least, they'll tell me what is on their actual table.
"With any luck, they'll tell you that there's lots of fields."
Fields on a table. Why? Is someone playing table football?
"No. They've created a database and have chosen some appropriate fields and field names."
Field names? I'm going to explode.
"Yes, field names. Name, address, phone number. Appropriate field names."
Maybe I should try to understand. It doesn't sound that complicated.
"I'll also talk about nested fields and my big favourite, normalisation."
Normalisation? Explain.
"Normalisation was a question at my teacher training interview. I was asked; how would I explain normalisation to your students."
So, teach me. What is normalisation?
"How long have you got?"
I have all day
"I was worried you'd say that."
Will you show me?
"Yes."
How?
"First, you will do your own research. Go to an Internet search engine."
What is an internet search engine?
"Oh dear, there is no hope. Maybe you should ask a normal person what's on their table. That's if there are any normal people left "
At least they'll tell me what's on their table, like what food they have.
"If you do find a normal person, you could ask them one thing?"
What? What shall I ask?
"Do you have a Raspberry Pi?"
Freewrite task, prompt by @mariannewest