Create a chain that reaches to the sky so that we can climb up it and invade the alien homeworld.
And so, that is what the people did. It took them months of sitting around and moving around linking a chain together that was long enough to travel around the earth six times, which is the exact length they needed to reach the other planet from end to end.
"Next," said the governor, "we need a rocket ship that will carry this end to the planet we wish to invade."
"How are we," asked one of the people in the area, "going to make sure that there is a safe landing so that we have a reliable anchor and don't get tossed out into space if the line isn't secure?"
"We have men ready to be deployed with the ship, one that will drill straight down into the planet and then drill horizontally like the letter 'T'."
The plan was set in motion. On April 10th, 1978, the rocket took off, the chain tied to it. It was three years before the rocket landed and drilled into the ground to anchor themselves.
The astronaut, Billy, radioed the NASA station.
"This is squirrel money. We've made contact with the tree and have planted the seed. The line is ready for re-enforcement to be sent."
NASA did not respond.
"Come in, Fairy God Mother."
A crackle sounded over the airwaves and then a voice.
"Ah, yes. Who is this?"
Surprised, Billy's face resembled puzzle pieces scattered about on the floor. "What do you mean who is this?" This must be a joke, he thought, but who jokes around like this at NASA.
"No, really. Who is this?"
"Stop horsing around. We have completed our mission and we await re-enforcements."
"Your mission?"
Waving through the window, Billy called for the other astronauts to come back inside. They dropped what they were doing and did as requested.
"Kurt," said Billy, "they are speaking in a language I don't understand, apparently. They keep asking me who I am and what mission we were sent on to do."
Taking out of his lip the last bit of chew he had been able to ration up until this day and putting that into a space bottle, he said, "Must be the signal. Maybe it is sending something else to them and sending something else back to us."
Billy had Kurt try to talk to NASA but he got the same response - "Who is this and what mission?"
Grabbing the last of the space food, Peter said, "We don't have time for that BS right now. We need food. The land outside is perfect for growing. I took samples and analyzed them. The ground is perfect for growing."
The three astronauts got to work. They build a farm that kept them fed for months. It didn't take long either. The ground was like a super grower. Anything that they put into the ground grew within days and was ready to eat within a few days after that. They kind of forgot about their life back home. The radio started to get rusty, along with the ship.
#posh -
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