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RE: The quick and horrible path to being funny: A guide for contestants in The COMedy Rumble.

Oil isn't supposed to separate out of peanut butter! Peanut butter is something you're supposed to be able to forget about in the pantry, until a niece or nephew comes to visit and wants a PB&J sandwich. My jar of peanut butter is as old as this house, and it's never needed stirring!

Church food is usually from the Food Bank. I still get food from those some winters! Sometimes you can sneak into the ones in nicer neighborhoods, where they have things like cookies and pudding cups. I hope your mother didn't let you wear your Martin Luther jersey to the Catholic food pantry line! 🤣