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The release of the new Barbie film has sparked a tidal wave of online chatter, with some claiming it caused a pink paint shortage so severe that it disrupted supplies. This saturation of commentary underscores how modern culture fixates on superficialities—pink paints, pixels, or social media hysteria—rather than engaging with genuine substance. Critics across the political spectrum have thrown their opinions, often rooted in ideological biases. Conservatives deride it as a feminist screed against masculinity, while liberals feign enthusiasm to appear progressive, even if secretly disdainful. The only notable exception seems to be Ben Shapiro, who Binged on Barbie toys until the fire department intervened—a bizarre, humorous testament to his genuine appreciation.