The T-shirt has worn out, Alby still remembers the day he got it. It was a present he got from her on last Valentine's Day, He is frequently wearing that T-shirt in these recent days. It isn't that much of a thing with an emotional bond with him, Alby was never a believer of these materialistic aspects. Recent days there is a change in him, maybe he thoughts that it will be a relief for him to be obsessed with things.
Laya wasn't like those normal girls, that may be the reason between the problems between them. She is the less possessive one Alby has ever seen, she never argued or got angry with Alby cause of he talking to other girls or not returning her calls. She was more of a practical person. She had some values, maybe it's her previous experiences that made her like that.
There were days Alby forgot to gift her back and wish on her birthday. She was not at all cared about these little things, At first, Alby asked apology himself without even Laya mentioning the situation. Eventually, Alby started utilising it and kept silent. There was some regret inside him, but he thought the love he had for her will be compensated for this.
The T-shirt is black, there is also something written on the front side. They are in a small font, Alby know the meaning of what was written on it, but it's very late. Unexpected things happened in the last month, Alby lost the touch with reality. It's just the T-shirt all he has, it's the only thing Alby has. She had become the texture of the shirt for him. He even started to forget a lot about her.
Now it's darkness in Alby's eyes, he couldn't see anything. The darkness which was inside him came out and started hAunting him. In that darkness, Alby could a lot her eyes. Alby forcefully opened his eyes. She's there, on the bed in front of him. Alby couldn't believe that she is sleeping like a kitten. Alby extended his hand towards touching her face. That forehead, he wanted to kiss there.
He could feel some coldness in her forehead. It's very cool, but there is some sweat. The sweat started increasing more and more, but it's still cold. Alby couldn't understand what was happening, again his eyes went into darkness. This time he didn't try to open it, he went along with the flow. He could feel the water around him, he was going more deeply into it.
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I believe this has something to do with regret mixed maybe with reminiscing. I love the way it was put out in post form. The ending was unexpected but makes when read again, which is something amazing as not a lot of material have a re-reading value.
Great job. Hope to see more of this.
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STOPTo support your work, I also upvoted your post!
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I enjoyed the haunting quality of this piece. Well done @badfinger
Thanks :)
Hi @badfinger. Thanks for contributing this interesting story to The Ink Well Challenge.
I hope you are open to some feedback. At The Ink Well, we are trying to nurture writers and encourage improvement in skills. We are also looking for the best content to reward.
Your story has quite a few errors. My two suggestions are:
For example, in the following two sentences, it is easy to see that there is a capitalization problem in the first sentence and a word missing in the second on.
I hope that helps you. Good luck with your writing.
Thanks @jayna I will be giving more attention to this from next post
Awesome!