Preface
I've been living as a digital nomad since 2017. I lived in more than ten countries before I arrive in Vietnam on 25.01.2020. On 28.01.2020 Vietnam decreed the closure of the border with China after the news about the appearance of a strange virus in the Wuhan market.
On 1 February all flights from China, Macao, Taiwan were suspended. Subsequently, the flights and the border with China were opened, but the situation kept changing. The restrictions on the entry in Vietnam were changing accordingly to the number of cases growing in different countries. Thus, Koreans and Europeans were also banned from entering the country at the beginning of March.
On March 22nd, all foreigners were forbidden to enter the country. In 28.03 activities such as gyms, cinemas, tourist sites, massage parlors, karaoke, and others were closed.
On 01.04 Vietnam decreed the total lockdown implementing the social distancing measures. Since then, people can only leave home to buy food and medicine
The restrictions imposed by the country totally changed my reality, my plans and my life as a digital nomad. I decided to write this diary to report these days and somehow continue to travel within an apartment of less than 32 square meters.
04.04.20 - You’re not going to travel anymore
I woke up and I was feeling a little bit upset and bored. It was a bright sunny Saturday and the only thing I had to do was work. I’m a freelance writer and copywriter and in the last week, after days of uncertainty, some clients decided to send me some jobs. I was very happy about that, for sure, but I really didn’t want to work on Saturday.
I settle for myself a morning routine, which consists in: wake up, enjoy my black coffee with cinnamon, do yoga, do some exercises, jump rope and meditate. Then, I have a cold shower and a proper breakfast for myself. Yesterday, however, I did my coffee and started to scroll on social media. A friend from Brazil was online and we started to talk. I’m having such wonderful conversations with some friends about these times and we talk a lot about keeping yourself positive. I’m totally against toxic positivity and yes, anger, sadness, boredom, uncertainty, and fear are things that we also need to feel. However, I’ve been observing some things that are interesting in these times… There’s a big difference to have bad feelings on what is real, and on what is not real.
Recently, I read “The 5-second rule” by Mel Robbins. I particularly am not a big fan of her, and for me counting from five to zero is not a miracle. However, in the book, she explains in a very interesting way how our brain behaves when we fear something and also how can those feelings grow to anxiety or even panic attacks. Our brain was designed for survival, which means that is part of us to design bad scenarios on our mind and also to react in a way to protect ourselves. If you’re not able to focus on the present moment or simply just stop this kind of thinking probably you’ll experience the dark side of anxiety.
I see many people thinking about terrible scenarios for the coronavirus situation, but most of them are not real. I believe, for each human being, this moment brings the fear of loss, and it can manifest in many ways… For me, my biggest fear of loss and something that really gave me anguish is the idea that I won’t travel anymore… Maybe it’s stupid for many people, but I design a whole life where travel could be part of it and I enjoyed too much the freedom of moving and living in different countries. Suddenly, I’m here, in a studio on Da Nang, Vietnam, as a bird on the cage… Those feelings brought me today huge anxiety until I made myself a big question: how can I travel inside this apartment? What is travel in the end? Take pictures and post on social media? Stamps in your passport? Crossing borders or countries? What is the real meaning of traveling? I realize that after these 3 years living as a digital nomad I didn’t put in practice many learnings that I had on the road. Loneliness, social distancing and even taking a beer online is not something new for me since I have friends around the world and a family far away from here… But there are many things to learn now. Like being in the present moment, accept, think about new possibilities and travel inside. I wrote this on my Instagram today and this is what I’ve been thinking… and I want to share with whoever is reading this diary.>
“So, you're not traveling anymore. Remember that word you tattooed on your shoulder? “Freedom”. You won't have it anymore. It's four walls of a room in a country where you don't speak the language and hardly understand the culture. You're not going to travel anymore. It's done. Said. Imposed. Accept it. Accept it in every cell of your body. Accept the backpack stored in the closet. Accept the silence. You will no longer travel... You will not. But you have come this far. You’re here to understand that traveling is much more than putting a backpack on your shoulders. It's much more than taking a plane into the unknown. It's much more than stamping a passport or crossing borders... It's so much more. You've come this far to take every great lesson you've kept in your bag. What a beautiful opportunity to put it all into practice! They're in there, floating in the 60 square meters of this apartment. They're standing there screaming in the middle of all this silence. You're not going to travel anymore, to understand that the journey is within us, it has no limits, no boundaries. The biggest boundaries I crossed were that inside... What a long way to go here! I'll never stop traveling, never... Because this is a great journey. To look for us from the inside and never arrive in somewhere.”
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Very interesting thoughts here, a great read. I can totally understand your feelings, even though for me right now, the inability to travel itself is not what bothers me the most. I think it´s just a kind of general melancholy and homesickness. I have been living a nomadic lifestyle for 10 years already (with some time spent in my home country meanwhile) and I think my desire to travel and explore has been slowly diminishing (even though I have only seen and experienced a fraction of what some other nomads, probably including you, did).
Stay safe, strong and healthy :) Sending hugs and best wishes to your apartment in Vietnam.
@tipu curate
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thank you @photun... yeap, the feeling that I cannot travel anymore really scares me! :(
I concluded to a similar thought from a completely opposite route when I flipped my life upside down and literally rooted myself on this island. It is the greatest travel that I have ever done and I feel more free than ever!
I don't worry for you. You are too grounded to let a global turbulence shake you and too aware to loose your path :)
Best wishes from Crete!
Thank you, my friend! Always good to have your comments here... Many thoughts, many ways of travel now... from the inside! I hope to visit you on Crete someday! When all this craziness finish
That would be great :)