My mother called out to me late yesterday evening. She had just returned from having some coffee in town and had heard the terrible news that someone had drowned.
“Larry has passed,” she said. “Larry, the guy who owns that artisanal brewery you used to go to, right?”
I called a mutual friend right away.
It had just happened. It’s one of those types of news you can’t really digest. Almost as if you’re waiting for someone to tell you it’s all just a misunderstanding.
Sure enough, it was true.
Larry has crossed the rainbow.
It’s part of our nature to want to know what happened. Maybe we’re trying to make mental notes. How can we be safer? Could this happen to someone else? To someone I love?
Whatever the reason, we feel this need to understand.
Apparently, Larry had just gone for a swim when the currents sucked him in.
The tides have been acting crazy lately, and what I can only describe as giant whirlpools have been forming surprisingly close to shore. The ocean is also unusually warm right now because of the El Niño conditions we're experiencing. I don't know if the two are related, and I'm certainly no oceanographer, but the water has felt different lately.
I’m not going to sit here and claim that I was close to Larry or anything like that. He seemed, as far as I could tell, like a cool person, and we exchanged pleasantries quite a few times.
We live in a small town, after all, and he did run a small brewery.
But still, it’s hard not to feel bummed out by something like this.
For one, I’m reminded of our fragility.
How a simple decision, like taking a dip in the ocean on a sunny evening, can become the last thing we ever do.
I’ve never decided if I believe in destiny or predetermined paths. I certainly feel like I land on both sides of the argument at different times.
But I do remember something Grandpa repeated often:
“If it’s meant to happen, it will. If it’s not meant to happen, you won’t be able to make it so.”
Was he right?
I don’t know.
That question is stored in the drawer of unknowns.
But boy, some days it feels very true.
MenO
I respect your Grandpa, and maybe he was right, but his view suggests some sort of plan, maybe logic in the course of events. I just don't see it. I see the fragility you suggest. We live on the edge of a precipice every moment of every day. We distract ourselves from the reality by doing this or that. At some point though we question, why? Why bother? We have to come up with a reason. Oh my heavens the philosophy books are filled with reasons. We can listen to this one or that, maybe take comfort in a system of thought.
I'm sorry for Larry. I'm sorry for his family and friends. I'm sorry for all those flood victims in Nepal. I'm sorry for the kids in Gaza who have nowhere to hide. I can't make sense of it. I do have a philosophy: Do everything we can to reduce suffering everywhere and anywhere. That's all that makes sense to me.
Sorry about the long, sober comment, but I've been contemplating the 'Why' in life, a lot these days.
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We get a lot of deaths like that in Michigan with the Great Lakes. They are like mini oceans and the currents and different behaviors along the shore can be deadly. I'm sorry to hear someone lost their life.
Sad news; my condolences to you and your town!
I think we have a large instinct to learn a lesson from such news. Having it be someone you know of sharpens that effect. Where I'm from, similar stories serve as a safety net for those not aware of these dangers.
Sorry to hear that. The sea can be treacherous even for experienced swimmers.
Well, I believe we are mostly in control of our destiny and he could have simply take a precaution of not going for a swim alone...
Sorry to read that. I've heard that El Niño does some crazy stuff down at the coast, but never that it can be that deadly.
Do you think your grandfather believed more in destiny or just accepted that some things are outside our control
O que é certo, certo está, a dúvida nunca se sabe, e o que nunca acontece, ninguém vê!
So sad to hear about Larry’s passing 💔. Your story is a reminder of how fragile life can be; one simple choice like swimming can change everything. The way you connected it to destiny and your grandpa’s words makes it even more thought‑provoking. Some things really do stay in that “drawer of unknowns.”
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