I never realized how close to the edge you lived.
I remember those times when I found a dime in the couch cushions and felt like I had struck gold
OMG...this is a scene from my life :) Amazing. All across the world there are probably kids living out the same scenario. Although, you'd never find a coin in my mother's couch cushions. She watched every penny, but once we were stuck in my father's car. I don't know where he was, but we sat and sat. We were hungry, so we searched around the car seats to see if any coins had fallen out of his pants.
I remember being too embarrassed to invite people to our house because it was patched together
I don't know if that ever leaves you. Maybe mine lingers because I have such difficulty socializing, but I cringe when the doorbell rings. When anyone comes in, and looks around, I feel it's a violation. Nothing wrong with my house now, I just don't feel comfortable having people cross that threshold.
They took a bizarre pride in barely making it and had a disdain for those with money.
This was not the case with my family. We were surrounded by successful relatives. We were lucky, because they helped us, especially when we escaped. But it was hard being a 'poor relation'.
In the end, I think the good character of your parents (flawed but good people) and of my mother 'saved' us. We took the best parts of what we experienced and used it to become productive adults.
Yes, I do feel a connection to you. I feel it especially when you show empathy for others.
Thank you very much for sharing that background with me. It's good to be reminded that the world is full of children who have uphill battles.