Many years ago I had a colleague, a woman who I remember for a specific reason. Her husband died of methanol poisoning and she was left a widower with a disabled son at a young age. She wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer and when we had a chat, the topic was mostly the same.
So many times I've heard her saying "if I'd have money I'd buy this and that". This was an ordinary thing for her, she's been doing that on a daily basis with everyone I suppose, not just me, and therefore after some time it became extremely annoying. Not to mention she was only speaking about outfits. I knew she was only daydreaming as she never had any money to spare for those outfits.
After so many years of life experience, I see things a bit differently and realize so many people are daydreaming on a daily basis and only a fraction of them are after making their dream come true.
I'm a bit different as when I mention something similar, which happens rarely, I say it as a goal and because I'm working towards realizing that goal, not just to hear my own voice. Those were different times, she was different, but served me as a good lesson.
Why did I think of her now? Not long ago I saw some ads about some passenger train carriages that offer you the luxury of your dreams. The article was called Go to Sleep in Paris, Wake Up in the Alps—Europe’s Most Exciting New Sleeper Train Routes and reading the title alone makes you want to try it out.
There are several crossing Europe, a dream of every long distance traveler. When I saw the article, listing a few railroad companies offering these amazing services and the routs, I though I'd make a list with them, you know, as a bucket list and pick one that I'm going to try out in the near future, but when I saw the price list, ... well, I knew I'd not be any different then my colleague. Why? The reason is a simple one. It all comes down to how much value you get for your money.
Travelski Night Express from Paris to the Alps, a night train to the slopes is an all-inclusive package, including transport, transfers, accommodation, and ski pass, with the option to rent gear (starting at 1,256 euros, or approximately $1,461 per person, based on current conversion rates). source
Would you spend the amount of money that would grant you a week at a modest, but decent place somewhere nice? If not, then why talk about it?
This made me thing of all the people I've met during my life, that I call empty talkers. I'd like to think that only 0.000000000000000000000001% of the people fit this category and I've met them all, but I know that couldn't be further from the truth. So many are talking all day, every day, saying things they don't really mean and/or making promises they never intend to keep. These are not energy vampires, but can still drain and waste your energy big time.
Over the years I've learnt to distance myself from them and avoid them as much as possible and when it's not possible, better make them face reality and stop them from wasting your time. You can't rely on their words, so why waste your time listening to them, just to make them feel better at your expense, right?
Most likely I will never understand why they are doing this or how they can live with their conscience, knowing they talk a lot and never do what they say they would.
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Very true, many people have dreams and desires, but they never go beyond just saying it. But what are you going to do about it to make that dream come true? You have to set small goals, make a plan to achieve them little by little, be consistent so you can really take hold of them, and I understand that there may be many personal circumstances that can complicate that goal, but it's very important to turn what you say into real actions, if that's what you want.
These people need to realize that dreams and desires are not equal with goals and also need to learn what goals are and work towards realizing them. It's a long road, but without it, they will always be "empty talkers", wasting people's time.
I understand getting annoyed at the same old never ending story, but....
I was born with an over sized empathizer (that I managed to tame a little over the years) .... The thing is, after living this long, I know that getting that lovely outfit or two (or whatever), would only have a momentary joy and then, the rest of someone's life is still the same, so it doesn't really make life better like you dream it could. You can't tell folks though, because you want to leave them their dream.
I try to make a mental list of other subjects I could try to steer things too, questions I could ask. It doesn't always work, but I try. I hate to totally give someone up just for being annoying, although I have. Sometimes their world is just so small. I can't imagine being a young mother with a disabled child.... alone.
As for the trip and would I do it? I probably would once if it was something I was deeply interested in.(reading reviews of course, for any unhappy surprises others experienced) Like you, I would look to see the one that I thought would be the greatest interest to me and I would plan it and do it. We need a few exciting things in our life on rare occasion.
Your dahlias are beautiful!
I agree with you completely, but we imagine those who live trying to impress or make other jealous by buying every single new, shiny thing (not this poor lady though) and in their head, happiness means posting their stupid photo on every social media platform for others to see. These people are ready to go to any length, spending money they don't have and so on.
It depends on your tolerance level, how much of your well being you are willing to sacrifice, listening to their nonsense.
I would only pay for such a trip, if my financial situation would be like I would have more than I could spend.
Thank you for the compliment, these are similar to dahlias, but are in fact are chrysanthemums 😀 I know they are quite similar. Dahlias are spring-summer flowers, while these are blooming this period of the year.
ha .... my bad on the flowers. That's what they looked like to me close up. :)
Who knows, those that show new outfits frequently, may be buying them, keeping them long enough to show them and then taking the outfits back. I've heard a lot about how others are influenced by the net and it kind of makes me sad. Makes me think there are too many that have no grasp on reality. Not sure how that is going to work out over a lifetime.
Lol 1500€ per person that's fucking crazy, I go holidays a week at the sea with that
Empty talkers, sadly I gotta deal with those due to in-law but as you say they are so annoying for wasting time talking with promises they will never respect, "I'll come fix this", "I'll visit you" etc and never ever even a bloody single time respect that
Exactly my thoughts. At this stage of my life, I'd look for something more suitable for that money.
I used to tolerate these and never said anything as not many people like direct confrontation, but not anymore. Now, if someone is promising and never keeping their word, I'm confronting them and as they rarely change, distance is starting to grow between us, which is good actually. I hate people you can't rely on. If you can't respect your word, at least call and let them know something came up. That's the minimum.
Yep, I also prefer to distance at a point even if in the case with family it's not really possible... Very annoying because I mean don't say at all things you won't respect!
We usually say, regarding relatives , that you either keep the kinship or distance 😆
Financial literacy is important in life dealings. Some people just neglect it and continue to make financial mistakes that can throw their lives down a hill. It's always important to gain value in everything you're doing. Not necessarily the price, but the value attached to the price that's important.
This is nonsense or should I say bullshit? Some things we do and get no value of, for several reasons.
Besides, this would not be a financial mistake but a conscious choice.
Even it's just for leisure or to past time, so long that is what you want at that time, I think it's also part of getting value. Value means a lot to different people and what someone considers valuable may not be valuable to the other person. I think the focus should be on personal value.