Photo by Chang Duong on Unsplash
I have had quite a torrid week. Maybe I am just blowing shit out of proportion, and maybe not, but it still has been somewhat of a difficult past few days. Before now, I was in a pretty terrible place. It was a mental state where I lost all desire to do anything. I have never been in such a state before. It was a mental state of complete apathy. Everything felt meaningless and pointless and I had zero drive to get up and fix stuff. My room was a mess, the laundry was stacked, and I was super hungry but did not feel like getting up to prepare summat. The worst of all, the part that made me realize that something has to change was that I couldn't even get up and attend mass; the one thing I derive so much joy from. It was not great, and everything has made me realize how much important it is to take mental health seriously. If that part of you isn't healthy, nothing else would work. It is that simple, and I have learned that.
THE HEALING PROCESS
I knew I was going to have to pull myself out of the rut, but I didn't know how. It was crazy. The first positive thing that happened was my sister visiting. Oh, she was a blessing. She helped cook something and I have been feeding off of that for a few days now. Then I started to fix stuff. I thought "if you are going to change the fucking world, clean up your room first". I started the sweeping, then mopping, doing laundry, and the freaking toilet. Bloody hell it was not easy, but I vanquished. All looks squeaky clean now. I started going out to talk to people, and have real human interaction and I felt so much better. All these positive things happened but they are not the climax of my story. The real healing started when I spoke with a true friend of mine. Usually, whenever we talk, we'd go on for hours without realizing it; talking about deep real-life issues, ranging from religion to humanity, to politics, etc. It was endless. He recently moved to the United Kingdom, albeit we don't talk very often (we never did really), but whenever we did talk, it was like we spoke every day. I spoke to him and him just listening to me rant was fucking soothing. Then he sent this...>/div>
God knows I needed that reassurance. I felt so much better, and it turned out all I needed was to speak to a friend, look at all that I have, and be grateful for them. Fcuking amazing. I haven't been doing too great financially too, and I was at my last bucks when I saw some money drop into my account today. I was surprised and confused. I mean, where the hell did that come from, then I got a message from the same friend of mine if I received anything. My heart was full of joy. Today I realize what it truly means to have a friend. A true friend and I am grateful. Thank you for reading this weird post of a grown man yapping about dumb stuff, hope you enjoyed it, lol. Cheers.
You're welcome. I enjoyed all that grown up dumb stuff.
Thank you sir 😊
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I'm so glad you have family and friends looking out for you. I know what the downward spiral feels like, and yes, sometimes just cleaning the house can shift that energy. Talking to others, doing something kind for others, self-care (however you can manage it) all help. Hang in there. You are not alone at all. 💖
Thank you so much 😌
Amazing how you still find time to read and comment so thoughtfully on posts like this 😅
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The challenge of being a man in these days is tough. What’s important though is experiencing the challenges and taking them head on. We are best when we are able to see a challenge and pursue it so that we can get past it. When we are on the other side though it’s confusing and we often don’t know what to do because we don’t see the next challenge yet. It sounds like you’ve had a little bit of this, with some other stuff sprinkled in of course.
One of the things that’s helped me is trying to get myself into a routine of doing specific things every morning or every other morning. Such as organizing the bed after we get up, putting the dishes away and some others. Having these set tasks that we need to do every day helps get the motivation to get out of bed and do it and once we are moving things are easier. If you’re moving around and doing, other things just fall into getting done and before you know it you’re feeling better.
The mental game on so many levels is the most difficult to get past. I know a fair bit about that as I was a runner for a number of years and your biggest enemy when you’re running is your mind. Your mind will convince your body that you can’t keep going but in reality your body is perfectly capable and fine for keeping on. It’s a bit mental game!
James Clear holds the record for most wisdom per word article, but I think you're going to rival him with this one.:)
That routine that you mention is exactly it. You make me remember the do something principle
Action = Motivation = Inspiration
Thank You 🙂