So I was on the phone last night with my cousin, and we were talking about her sister, who's this brilliant, super-talented kid. A really great pianist and visual artist, but who, like most 18-year-olds, is lacking direction. Anyway, and I was just saying what a shame it is that she's not focusing on her art, because there's so much she could do online with it.
And my cousin goes..."like what?".
It took me a moment to realize it was a genuine question, because my brain was a-buzz with all these things you can do online if you've got a bit of artistic talent. So I started telling her, how her sister could put up her art on social media, or create prints of it, you know, gather a following, all that nice stuff that the Internet's made easy and accessible to us. (Well, not easy. Easier than it was in the past. But not easy.)
She was so surprised. Like "I never thought of that."
See, theirs was a very traditional education, you know, school, college, now she and her siblings are doing Master's degrees. Not because they need them, it's not that kind of high-brow field. But you know, it's what people do. Needless to say that part of the family did not take it kindly when I dropped out of high school. They don't really 'get' the whole unschooling concept, because that's not what people do.
You're supposed to follow the path.
Except my sense of direction's so bad, that I've been gone off the path a long time. I can't even see it back there. And maybe it's this difference in education that accounts for this. Because I've always been the kind of person who's like "okay, I'm interested in X, how can I pursue that?", and breaking away from the traditional schooling path, I had to figure out that last part for myself.
When I was 15, I no longer had teachers to tell me how or why or what to study. Actually, scratch that, they never tell you why in school.
So if I was interested in psychology (of which I am a big, big fan), I'd go online, or I'd buy a book. It was basically, okay, how can I dig deeper into this subject that interests me? And thankfully, the Internet provides a lot. At 15, I was following Yale classes on psychology because it's something I genuinely enjoy. I was going in 10 directions at once, and I still am. I'm interested in a lot of things, and being exposed to all these varied sources of information, I was getting so much input about what other people are doing on X subject, and that broadened my own horizon so much.
And not having anyone to tell me was cool, because it forced me to figure out a path myself. And that's something I see in my 14-year-old brother, too, who's been unschooled all his life. He has this tremendously broad palate, and range of interests, and has developed such keen skills for uncovering stuff, and getting to the bottom of things that interest him.
My cousins, on the other hand, don't. They're very clever, they're well brought-up, and whatever, but there's something lacking there. That instinct to go after things you find exciting just isn't there. And they've sort of gotten trapped in this never-ending system cycle of having someone else direct their education and implicitly, their knowledge, even though they're fully fledged adults by now, and should be in charge of that.
I have another cousin, a boy, who's the same age as me, and who's very smart, and well-read, and I think he would really like to do what I do, which is to write. We had this conversation like 2 years ago, how he'd like to, but never tried it. I encouraged him to go for it, to find somewhere to write, and just start doing it. Needless to say, he did not. Recently, he just got into this two year journalism degree, so by the time he gets the official school greenlight to write, he'll be almost 26. By which point I will have worked as a writer for 7 years.
'Cause I got into it at 19. Actually, I got into writing at 17 here, but at 19, I started freelancing, and making money off it. Obviously, no school, definitely no journalism degree. I just really liked writing, and came upon Steemit (as was), and started writing.
Couple of years later, money was kinda tight, so my first thought was okay, how can I help and what am I good at? Freelance just came natural, and it turned out to be an extraordinary Godsend. I love my job, it's so much fun, and such a free, liberating experience.
funny thing is, that part of my family, after being appalled that I was quitting school, has always looked down on me for not going to university for like 5 years, like they all did. Must be kinda stupid, right, if you don't even have a college degree?
Not really bitching about my fate here. I have a job I love that allows me to travel and see the world -- I'd have to kick myself if I was bitching about it, you know? I do, however, take enormous pride in what I do, and in my own intellect. Must be because I know I built all that myself. It wasn't given freely, and no one pointed out the way.
All in all, I think I got the better deal, though, because my schooling experience left me with this pro-active attitude. If I'm interested in something, I'm very hands-on about it. I try stuff. I put a lot of content out there, to see what works, I don't really expect anyone to outline the path forward. I don't think there is one, I think you have to make it yourself. And all in all, I think that's a better mindset to go into the world with, because infamously, where there's a will, there's a way. But if you expect someone else to figure out the path for your, and put you on it, you're playing a dangerous game.
More often than not, the system puts you on the path it wants for you, and you may find it differs quite a bit from what you had in mind.
Of course, by the time you figure that out, it's kinda late, and you're missing critical tools to carve out your own path. Which isn't to say there aren't those who manage to do that, just that it's so much harder, the later you leave it.
It's great to read from someone now adult who was homeschooled. It strikes some chords with me, because of what my youngest is currently experiencing now. She is currently doing her SACE (South Australian Certificate of Education) online, which is like the end of high school certificate. She finishes this year and it was a 3 year task. We did it because she didn't really know what direction she wanted to go in and hubby was concerned about her not have any certification behind her (my eldest wanted to go to university, so she just did the adult entry test). The route we chose was supposed to be where she could follow her interests and they would collate it in a way which fits what the moderators want to see for the SACE to be awarded. We're talking about the school system here, though, so I'm sure you can imagine that it wasn't that simple.
Her last stage 2 (moderated) subject is creative arts and based around photography, which is one of her interests (her other is psychology 😉). However, like many artists she has run into the constrictions of the academic world where she can't just create, she has to do it to certain guidelines and write the things that they want to read in the way that they want to see it. So now she's basically being told she's not got the talent for art because she's struggling to conform to their ideals in her presentation of it. It makes me soooo mad and I can see her being put off her passions because of it.
Oh my, I can't imagine how frustrating this must be for you. She shouldn't let anyone tell her if she's good at her art, certainly not to a school. You can't teach art and especially not talent at any school. The only true way for an artist to grow is by practicing and exploring her ideas and curiosities. Even if it turns out they suck sometimes. That takes tremendous courage, more than they could ever teach you at any institution.
I hope with all my heart she doesn't allow those nitwits to put her off. Because if she does, she's gonna wonder all her life what it might've been like if she'd stuck to it. But with a mother like you, I'm sure she's a smart, well-based girl, so I do trust she'll see the light.
Yes, fingers crossed it doesn't put her off. Thankfully the problems aren't directly to do with her photography work itself. She always had a good eye for photos, even as a child, so I'd like her to retain some confidence there.
Confidence grows when tested <3
When you brought up the point about your cousins needing someone to tell them what to do, I immediately thought of the same kind of people during Covid times, they all went crazy! Suddenly there was no boss standing in front of them telling what to do and what time to do it, but most shockingly, they didn’t know how to direct themselves on spare time either. No gym with a buddy, no soccer practise, nobody calling them that hey lets have coffee on Tuesday at 5pm. I was in utter shock when I saw people all over asking what the hell are they supposed to do now that ”everything is shut down and you can’t see anyone”, like they don’t even have a mind of their own and zero interests if someone isn’t telling them exactly what to do.
Glad we are not those kind of people, the problem is almost opposite because there is an infinate number of interesting things to do and learn!
So on point. I don't get people who can't be on their own, or who get bored if they're not "hanging out". Not only is it unhealthy for them, it' s just plain weird...being able to do your own shit rocks. Why would anyone avoid that?
Ugh, there are very few people I want to hang out with regularly. I guess people like that grew up with parent taking them straight from daycare or school to after school hobbies and they always had other people to tell them what is going to happen next.
Well, I don't see how that could possibly go wrong :))
I think it's great that you have found your own path and that you move from your interests. It is very difficult to make others understand, especially parents, that you do not want to go in the direction that they have set and that they consider to be the "right" one. Many people limit themselves and the school, sometimes, conditions the skills and not being able to see beyond the established standards. It was a pleasure reading you. Greetings.
it just seems like a lot of wasted potential, you know? A lot of people settling for stuff they're mediocre at, just because the thing they'd actually be good at wasn't a traditionally accepted career path, or they weren't exposed to it at school.
Thank you, I'm glad you resonated :)
That's right, mediocrity can surround many people because they do not feel capable of challenging conventional paradigms. We must listen to our hearts and analyze our skills, we will always be excellent in a certain job. I love these things to ponder. Greetings.
A beautiful experience. Nowadays, worldwide, there should be more openness to homeschooling. I have always thought that schools often kill creativity and limit the freedom and excitement of learning. Thank you for this entertaining reading.
Oh, boy, is that such a common issue today. Just following the routine because it's "what you're supposed to do" instead of acting with purpose and following your interests. The public school system is 12 years of imposed routine. Then you have to get a college degree. But then what?
I like the library because it encourages organic exploration of interests instead. If you don't need an accredited degree, don't waste time and money chasing one. Learn and do instead! But that idea seems to be deliberately removed from discussion in K-12 school.
What you mention in your post is really important, discovering the path and following your own tastes and interests can only be achieved when you have a true creative spirit and freedom to experiment as well as to deepen your skills, capabilities and abilities. Homeschooling is really wonderful, when my kids were with us at home for two years because of the pandemic they learned at their own pace and in a very creative way, plus my wife and I were able to get more involved with them and that is an added value. Today your vision of someone already older is wonderful. Thank you for sharing.
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Very well said @honeydue and I like your point. Having a college degree is not a guarantee that you will have a good paying job after you graduate.
Some people thinks that having a degree will give you a good job but in reality being employed sometimes won't give you real happiness.