How To Stop Being Shy And Quiet | 7 Tips To Overcome Shyness

in #life6 years ago

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Just be yourself! Don't try too hard and people will like the Genuine you!


1. Embrace your strengths 

Everybody's good at something and you're no exception shy quiet people are just as smart successful competent and interesting as extroverts the only difference is that shy people might have a hard I'm talking about what makes them so unique so others don't get a chance to notice it if someone asks you about yourself this is the time to speak up about the things you're great at maybe you're an avid reader have an amazing taste in music or are really good at your job or studies if you don't talk about your accomplishments no one will ever know about them not to mention this is a great exercise in increasing your self-esteem and quieting that harsh inner voice of yours take some time to think about the things you're really good at or topics you know a lot about and come conversation time that information will be your secret weapon speaking of which 


2. Offer information 

Being in a large group of friends or acquaintances can be an awkward experience for people who suffer from social anxiety but still don't wait for others to ask how you're doing how your projects are going or what you did this weekend take the initiative to tell your friends what's going on in your life your close ones will appreciate you sharing this information and keeping the conversation going the same goes the other way around remember to also ask your friends how they are talking about yourself and asking others about their lives seems like an impossible task for a shy person because it means well talking and having people look at you I know you'd rather be a fly on the wall and wait for others to pull you into the conversation but if you want to overcome your shyness actively offering information is a must 


3. Don't advertise your shyness 

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You know it's all too easy to apologize to others for an awkward interaction by saying something like sorry I'm really shy but by advertising your shyness you're only trapping yourself in this label people might not even see you as quiet or awkward until you bring it up and from then on they'll only be able to see you that way there's nothing wrong with being the shy one but holding on to that label can really set you back if you sincerely want to open up and be more conversational and what if someone else brings up your shyness themselves just try to keep it casual you can tell them you don't see yourself that way or just brush it off 


4. Practice your body language 

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Body language tells you so much about a person in social situations people who feel awkward or shy might cross their arms or legs avoid eye contact angle their body away from others stand or sit further away or lower their head they might also hide behind their phone or always keep it in hand it's important to be mindful if you do any of these things and change your body language to be more open and friendly 

-sit or stand up straight 

-keep your head held high

-maintain eye contact 

assume a comfortable body position that's angled towards the person you're engaged with and of course put your phone away and listen even if it feels weird for you to use confident body language at first these poses themselves can actually start to build confidence in you 


5. Start saying yes 

Now if you're shy you're probably skilled at declining invitations just to avoid social interaction you might even come up with excuses or go out of your way to avoid someone or some event but when you say no you create a barrier that closes off opportunities next time someone asks you if you want to go to dinner or join them with some friends on an outing try saying yes instead if you see an acquaintance at the mall don't run away and hope they don't see you if this is someone you like then just approach them and start catching up saying yes can be empowering which is a real confidence booster plus if people are constantly inviting you out with them they obviously like you and want to spend time with you so go for it and hang out with people who care about you


6. Stay in the moment 

If you're out with a group of friends and you've said something incorrectly or you think you sounded foolish it gets that critical inner voice going and you get so caught up in your self demeaning thoughts that you totally disengage with what's happening at the present time your brain can even start tricking you and telling you how your friends are totally looking at you like you're some kind of idiot when that's absolutely not the case the stuff that vicious cycle of anxious thoughts from ruining your night out you've got to put all your focus in what's actually happening if you feel you're starting to be led away from the conversation by your own thoughts a good trick is to start asking follow-up question to who's ever asking at the moment this will serve as a good distraction for you and the people you're with will feel glad that you're listening 


1. Do the things you're scared to do 

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It's worked for others down through history Eleanor Roosevelt said you must do the things you think you cannot do Ralph Waldo Emerson said do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain and this one conquering your greatest fear can sometimes turn it into your greatest strength oh yeah I said that one Hey overcoming shyness isn't just about learning to talk to people it's also about the basic principle of doing the things you're scared to do you learn earlier that a fear of being judged usually plays a big part in being shy maybe you've always wanted to dance in a club join a sports team or give a speech in front of a crowd but you've always been way too shy to even think about it start by practicing to face your fears with the help of someone you trust if you've always wanted to sing for example you could go to karaoke night with a friend this way you know that no matter what people think you have a friend that's right there to support you once you've done that well the sky's the limit





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