You are an amazing writer, but I admit that I had to stop reading at the "what is tweaking" part. I lost my brother to suicide while he was high on meth. (Our ages and birth years are so close together) I can relate just a little too much and am feeling really overwhelmed.
I just wanted to comment to say that I am so so sorry for your loss. You have a beautiful way with words and capturing your story that really makes it feel like I am sitting and talking with you over coffee or something.
Anyway, sorry for the sad comment... I am feeling a little speechless right now.
Love that you were able to share this.
@byn