Dear Mere,
I don't know what an "Aspie" is?
In any case, I do know the pressure of wanting to "stick around" to be sure things go well for children and grandchildren. I think that is a strong reason why many of us just try to hang on... ;)
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An Aspie is a person assessed with Asperger's. Technically on the autism scale according to the DSM-V, which was probably edited by non-Aspies/NTs (neuro-typicals) because they don't know what to do with us - lol
Oh, dear, that must be quite a struggle. I wish you the best! Thank you for the explanation.