Why Are You Choosing To Be Unhappy?

in #life7 years ago (edited)

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Today was like any other day in terms of emotional triggering/turbulence. However, today, my 17 year old black lab Boo, decided to empty the contents of his bowels all over my beautiful red rug in the living room. He has had a poorly belly for a number of days now, but today was the first day he’d ‘gone’ in the house. 


It was perfect timing as in a couple of hours I was to go to my weekly Buddhist meditation class. This definitely gave me something to work though during my meditations. 


What feelings arose?

Anger and irritation. Primarily because I feel/felt like I can’t have beautiful things without them getting “spoiled” by the dog. But consciously, I know Boo didn’t do it on purpose, he held it in as long as he could and as he’s 17 I have to make allowances. Also, it’s ONLY a rug, His well being is more important than a £30 rug. 


Boo was giving me a lesson in impermanence. Even a beautiful rug is impermanent.


On the way to med class Chris picked me up (like he does every week) and we were discussing our day and any insights we may or may not have had. We talk every day so we are fully aware of each other's personal and spiritual growth. He said “going to med class is like hitting the reset button, it gives you a focal point every week so you can never stray far off the spiritual path.” I couldn't agree with him more,  it brings me back into alignment.  


My Notes and Reflections on the Teachings ...

We all at times experience disturbed minds, whether that's anger, jealousy, desire or irritation. These are not peaceful happy minds. 


By meditating and reading spiritual scriptures we are learning how the mind works. If we know how the mind works then we can influence it. However, we MUST put the work in. 


Check out my blog post on Effort and The Art of Happiness.


Meditation gives us a sense/flavor of peace. This shows us that inner peace can be attained if only if we make the effort each day in our spiritual practices. 


Inner peace and happiness is something that we CAN develop. 


The more we grow in awareness, the easier we can cultivate happiness. 


By meditating you will naturally develop a more positive mind. You can’t find it online or down the happiness isle in Tesco. It requires time each day to meditate, contemplate and by working on pure teachings.


We ALL have the Buddha potential; to become enlightened and attain inner peace. If only we put the work in.


How I see meditation and training the mind:

  1. The swirling glass of water. Pick up a glass of water and subtly shake it from side to side. That is how I see our untrained, unmeditated (I know that's not even a word, but you understand what I mean) minds, however, shake it then place it down on a table, the calming of the water (whilst still subtly shaking) is how I see the benefits of meditation. The chaos of delusions created in our mind will slowly subside. 
  2. Your mind is like an untrained unruly dog. Every time you sit and meditate and your mind becomes active, organizing your day, writing your shopping list or even walking the aisles of Tesco, simply bring it back to the breath and eventually your thoughts will settle down. 

So by meditating, your (negative) thoughts will gradually subside, making space for positive ones to arise. Meditation gives you the space and relaxes your mind.


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Make The Instructions Practical.


This is what I love about Buddhism. You can make the teachings practical. Other religions operate on blind faith and to me that is just bizarre. I have read news stories that some people in certain “religions” have been ostracized for questioning the basic teachings and I have spoken to many Catholics and they haven’t even read the bible! How can you dedicate your whole existence to something you don’t fully understand. 


Make the spiritual path practical. You can use everyday life experiences so teachers and things to work through during your meditations.


Where Are We Investing Our Time?


Westerners are very busy people. Our day is full of things; bathing/showering, making ourselves presentable to the world, going to work, preparing, cooking and eating all our meals, shopping for our meals, driving from a to b, spending time and maintaining our relationships with family, gardening, caring for our pets or loved ones and general housekeeping. WOW I feel tired just typing it. LOL. 


It is “normal” for us to be busy. 


We invest A LOT of time in being busy. We are always investing in the outside world as we think by primarily focusing on the outside world it will make us happy and rarely focus on our inner world (within our mind). However this is where the magic will happen. I’m not saying that we should neglect all our commitments in the outside world, of course we need to bathe and go to work to provide shelter etc, however, taking 20-30 minutes out, each day to meditate, to read and contemplate the Buddhist scriptures, you will transform your life. Yes we need money to survive however, it won't ultimately make you happy. 


If we can invest time in our appearance each day then surely we can dedicate 30 minutes to our spiritual practice and train the mind?!?


External “joy” quickly disappears, for example, a Christmas Dinner with your family, you spend weeks or even months planning each dish, who likes what, time frames so that everything is ready at the same time and THEN there’s cooking the actual meal but the meal is consumed within minutes. Like it never really happened. 


Yendrik (my Buddhist teacher) told me a story about an incident that had happened earlier that day ... He had been at the Sheffield Buddhist Centre all day helping them with the current refurbishments being undertaken, when he was about to leave, he got into his van and as Sheffield is very hilly, he reversed down a hill into a whacking great skip and smashed his tail lights. He could’ve chosen to get angry or irritated OR he could remain peaceful. As he is very versed in training the mind, he simply laughed it off with the builders that were on site. The problem wouldn’t have changed if he decided to get angry or play the victim, the lights still need repairing no matter how he chose to respond.


Meditation and following the spiritual path will deepen our mind/body connection as they are one in the same. 

A peaceful mind = a peaceful world

You will change the lives around you by being more peaceful. You know what it’s like being around an angry and negative person. It feels awful, their negative energy rubs onto you and you find that you’re feeling negative but you don’t know why ... that's why! The same applies to positive happy people. Like a domino effect. 


So going back Boo messing onto my beautiful rug, getting angry or irritated wouldn’t and didn’t solve the situation right in front of me, all I had to focus on was the problem at hand.

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It’s quite funny, as during the last meditation at the end of class, we did a simple breathing meditation then focused on the positive qualities and our intentions to cultivate a peaceful and happy mind and the in flat above the meditation room we could all hear the song The Music of the Night playing. It was very distracting. But how amazing is that? We were given a lesson on positive focus. Despite the external noises or demands, focus on your mind on pure peaceful and beautiful mind. Talk about making it practical!


The Buddhist teachings are like valuable diamonds. Even a tiny fragment still holds great value.


Just to remind you that the book, Transform Your Life is available on a FREE DOWNLOAD or you can buy the paperback for £9.56 on Amazon.


Yendrik was talking to one of Geshe Kelsang Gyatso’s disciples and they said that the book Transform Your Life has been downloaded in 150 countries in the past 6 months. How amazing is that? I don’t know if I could even name 150 countries. 


I hope you have enjoyed this post. 
 

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