And as soon as you left, I started dumping my meals in the name of shoddy food, I started cursing my hair and the bad haircut; which I would otherwise have managed with the flawless confidence in the smile reaching my eyes, had you still been here.
I don't miss you; I'm just stuck— half in the future, half in past. It's gone, and happening again, to be gone forever. 
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STOPCool piece!
Thank you @jenniferhosein