Applying for jobs is taking all my energy! Why am I always the second runner up?

in #life6 years ago (edited)

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Working as a freelancer has its advantages, I love being my own boss, and being able to spend a lot of time with my kids. On the other hand I find it hard to earn enough income, It's hard to find clients, and the one I find always push the prices too low so in the end sometimes it's not even worth it. Another problem is that I find it kind of lonely. I have a great home office in the garage, but I'm sitting there alone, day in and day out. No need for mascara or a nice clothes.

So lately I have applied for jobs. It feels like a curse because I'm always invited to interviews, and often I'm the last one of two standing... Too often a case is given and I then need to put my freelance life and family life aside (and Steemit) and go all in on the case to present for a hopefully future employer. Today I got another rejection! I've spent the last three weeks on two interviews and solving and presenting a case for them resulting in late nights, no time for the kids and a lot of nerves. For what? Being second best doesn't help when there's only one job! I have instead wasted time I could have used on freelance/illustration/family/vacation. I wish I could apply for jobs without solving a case along the way! Now I just feel empty, and need to keep going from where I left off.

Another problem... There's more fish in the local lake than there are available jobs in the creative industry.
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Seeing this on the positive side, I can go back to what I love, drawing and designing, posting here on Steemit, and spending time with my kids.
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Anyone out there in the same situation?

:) Helen

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so cute :) spending time with kids feels great :)

Thanks! Yes, I couldn't agree more! They have such a naive and fun look at life :)

The issue of being "alone" when you run your own business is something people in the same situation often say. A nice alternative other than finding an actual job could be to rent a desk in a shared office space or work in a local coffee joint where other freelancers work. This could also provide new customers if you are lucky. The question then is, of course, if there is such a thing nearby.

In what field are you applying for jobs?

Yes, I would definitely love to be part of a shared office space, but problem is that it costs a little, but then again, I believe productivity would rise so that it would be worth it! I am actually looking in at it at the moment, but I was awaiting the job I've been interviewed for...
I'm applying for jobs within graphic design, illustration and marketing, but it could also be something completely different like a mountain guide or something!

Yeah, I guess your right with the costs. Also, these locations can differ quite in sense of atmosphere and productivity. Would be great if you could combine the graphic design work with being mountain guide! Can't think of any way how though :P

Why can't you be a mountainguide and keep the designpart freelancing during your freetime?

But anyhow, it still sucks to be 2nd best... but it should make your skin thicker for the next interview so your nerves won't show up anymore! Just keep your head up and stay positive 😘

It's definitely an experience along the way, and for every interview and case presented I do feel more confident. Combining mountains and freelance would be awesome. I also have family life to consider, if not I would have moved to the mountains without hesitation! At one point I did work as a ski instructor by day, and freelancer by night, it was perfect. I'm keeping my heads up and I do think other opportunities will come my way! Thanks! :)

Did i see you smile while you were typing those last sentences?😉

I can imagine that family life always goes first no matter what! family life is not doable while being a guide in the mountains?

Yes, that would be a great combination! I am thinking and looking at all possibilities. :)

Hi Helen. Nice blog. I m a norwegian newbee living up north. I also have small kids and like to be creative. Have you ever asked why you end up as no 2 ? I think by analyzing it you can win the next time. Good look and nice if you follow :)

Thank you, and nice to meet you!
Yes, I know why I’m nr.2, it’s because the positions are mostly not in my field, but I’m giving it a go anyway😅. So being nr.2 is not that bad after all... see you around👍😊