I was doing stuffs online when the internet suddenly shutdown, all the sites weren't working and even Hive and PeakD weren't too. I slowed down and wondered what was happening. Realized it was an issue with Cloudfare afar a while.
Yesterday was another heavy dump in the crypto market, I didn't bother to check prices because I knew it'll just send me down a spiral below. I've been expecting to get some pay for over 3 weeks now and it hasn't happened.
Basically everything hadn't turned out so good in the past month, and the internet had to stop working for me to actually sit down a little to imagine everything that's been going on wrongly. My hospital appointment was supposed the to be in a week, but I had to postpone, because I wasn't mentally prepared for having blood drawn, experiencing anxiety and then having that after effect of trying to accept everything.
lately all I do is try to make money to pay the bills, take some time to pray and then slump to bed after a hard day, the work has been telling on my physical and mental health.
Some days ago, some old acquaintance messaged me, saying they wanted to start up something serious, that they had send the world and wanted a lover who could be with them. For a moment I laughed inside of me, I'm sure that knocked out 20 points from my BP.
This is because I remembered when looking for love was my biggest problem, to be fair I was healthier, more financially stable and had my nuclear family, and I just can't imagine that there was a time I had normal people concerns and cravings.
I wanted to give her the regular lecture, but I just had to much work and a lot of bills to pay... I'm only getting an artificial time to take a break because the internet (the place I work from) is glitchy.
It's a blessing for me to be able to take a pause, right now I'm taking it slower and trying to handle the simpler things, letting God decide the future and just taking my time to handle the minor things. I don't know when I'll show up again with a post again, perhaps in another 7 or 8 days time.
Taking the time off is probably good for your overall stress. The internet being glitchy may be a blessing in disguise. Cloud fare was down a lot the past twenty four hours making it hard to get anything done. So many sites depend on it's for security that it shut down also a quarter of the internet. Including Hive front ends.
Just take things easy and try to keep the anxiety down which is very hart to do. I know that all too well... I haven't been feeling great lately either...
Take care of yourself my friend, that's the most important thing!
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I'm sorry about this, I have taken so much time off Hive, don't try and sort out my expenses and numerous hospital visit. I hope you're also taking trips to the hospital and doing the required tests and taking the right medication?
That's what I've been doing all these while. I managed to put my thoughts together while the whole thing was down, and for one moment it felt peaceful.
Take care of yourself too
I know it's difficult to take time for ourselves, but it is critically important. It's never easy to do it in the moment, but when we look back when we did do it, we often appreciate how much we needed it!
The internet outage was crazy this morning, because of how much it affected. Really makes you wonder how fragile the entire damn system is when big players go offline, everything falls apart. No backups.
The system is actually very fragile and sometimes I wonder when the decentralization of the web will also get to the internet. Yes looks like the outage was worldwide, and it was somehow the only reason why so many people had a break out of their busy schedules.
Everything feels so fickle, and this was a reminder.
That message from your old acquaintance made me laugh a bit too, life really picks odd timing for that kind of stuff. Sometimes all you can do is keep moving and also give yourself a well deserving break
Yes, it was a very odd time, considering I was dealing with a lot of challenges and what she was talking about wasn't in my books. I just wanted to catch a health break and breathe
And it's a good thing you catch the health break, health is more important than everything else because without it we can't perform in anyway whether finance, relationships, impact or personal growth. Health is number 1
Everything being said, let Matthew 6:34 be your best scripture, always find joy in the midst of challenges.
Am happy you are coping gradually
Thank you, I appreciate it. God is in control
Yes He is, just rely on Him because he cares for you, no one cares for you more than He does
Everything happens for a reason. Although you may not have been pleased with the internet downtime because you had work to do but I think it's all good. At least you were able to use the downtime to reflect on life and gain more insight.
Keep keeping hope alive. God above everything.
The downtime possibly gave you a little break from the endless work-sleep circle... I also went out for a walk
I hope the exams are slowly getting better anyways... As for crypto, let's just skip to the next year and close our eyes now
Life just doesn't go your way sometimes, and I am glad you were able to take a small break due to the internet issues. You can't predict what will happen sometimes, and real life is more important. I hope you feel better soon and that you are able to take your mind off of all the stress.
I'm with you man, its never too easy, and as we age, it gets tougher to maintain. We are still young, and theres time to heal some things, although I don't recall some of the issues you have mentioned. Just keep pushing tho, I must do so as well. Pause pause, then Unpause.