What goes in my head while meditating.

in #life6 years ago (edited)

I had my first best meditation session today.

I have been meditating on and off for the past two years, in the wake of my chronic daily headaches. Starting this year I promised myself that I would meditate everyday even if that meant me closing my eyes for a couple of minutes. I have been regular at it for the past week and today was the first time that it was different.

I realised it when I jumped on my yoga mat thanks to a WhatsApp forward that caused my mobile to bleep loudly. That's when it occurred to me that I was actually deep inside my thoughts. I had successfully managed to put aside the other ambient noises of cars passing and horns blowing. I had managed to put myself in a trance with only my breathing as focus. Today was not only a proud moment for me but also an encouraging one. As soon as I got done, I wanted to remember this moment. I wished to be able to turn to the memory of this tiny but significant success in my meditation journey. This is more of a log of my thoughts that helped me reach slightly deeper within my own self than it is a guidance to all of you who are reading this. This is how I interact with myself when I am meditating...

First, you gotta chill Mohita. Relax those shoulders. They are far too high up in the sky. Bring them down...there you go. Now take any strain off of your neck muscles. The world is not sitting on your head. Good...but the shoulders are back up. Bring them down again sweetie. There you go...now you have become a normal person. Now its time to bring your attention to your breathing. Breathe in breathe out breathe in breathe out....gosh I have to submit my assignment. Oh I have to do the laundry today. I did yoga just for 15 mins...STOP! Breathe in breathe out breathe in breathe out...nanananananana batman! I like superman more though. I wish I was in Hogwarts right now. I am soooo lazyyyyy. Wait. Breathe in breathe out breathe in breathe out.
Okay, everything positive in everything negative out...positive in negative out...positive in negative out...so when I am getting rid of all the negative energies what am I exactly doing? Energy cannot be destroyed; it can only be converted. So when I imagine all the negative energy flowing out of me...where is it going? Am I sending them out in the world? So my meditation is responsible for contaminating positive energies out there?

Ugh! Is that your problem right now? Go back! Breathe in breathe out breathe in breathe out....in, out...positive in negative out, positive in, negative out. Uh oh, my leg is asleep. Okay a few more minutes...breathe in breathe out breathe in breathe out breathe in breathe out, in, out, in out.....(this went for a long time before my mobile rudely interrupted me!)

Aha! I must have sat in meditation for half an hour! Okay...open your eyes slowly. Now rub your hands together and press them against your face. Let's check the time! 10 minutes? But it was so long!!