"I hear and I forget,
I see and I remember,
I do and I understand"
- slogan of the "Experiential Learning" movement in pedagogy
Books are great, perusing their knowledge can take you so far, but only so far.
Rote learning is too passive; didactic - useful, but too unstructured. Both of these approaches have their place: preparation and review. Their usefulness tends to stall beyond baseline knowledge reinforcement, but can at least provide some foundation. To gain real insight requires commitment to active engagement.
Active learning synthesises concrete experience into new learning in volo by observation, reflection, and analysis.
Learning how to learn is among the most valuable lessons. You've provided some good tips on how to achieve this, including acceptance that you will not always 'win' but if you turn an analytical eye upon the knowledge received then you have not failed but rather gained something, and in such way will ever be a winner.