You Can't Hear Them If You Don't Listen
How in the hell was I supposed to know?
I hear mine all the time and know for a fact you're hearing yours right now at this very moment. As I write this, I'm hearing it. It seems to know what I'll write before I even write it. How can this be?
Sometimes I have to wait for it. It's like my master presses the pause button to go make popcorn. I sit, idle. The vehicle is running, but no one is inside. Nothing comes out of this mind and onto this screen made up of thousands of tiny, magic, flashing light beams from outer space, without hearing this strange voice first.
I Think It's Me
...but how can I ever be sure?
It's just chemicals and juices swirling around in meat.
Some parts can go rancid. We've all seen it happen. So fragile. Be careful. Add a molecule or two, or maybe take one away for a few seconds. Everything including the outlook on life changes.
What would life be like if every time we stubbed a toe or sliced a finger, we started trippin' balls? Hallucinations entering the eyes and ears and coming from every direction for hours, or until the bleeding stops. A cabinet maker overdoses after getting a sliver on the job. All he did was hurt his meat.
That's the third one this week!
Even without the help of a drug, your entire world can change the moment that voice goes away, or turns into someone else. Too many natural illnesses out there to list now though.
One Day You're You
...the next, you're not. Done.
If it's self inflicted, we have an advantage. We saw it go in. We wanted to meet that odd walking mind traveler from mushroom mountain. If it's natural and sneaking in through the back door, we won't even notice how our little voice has a new accent and prefers to smoke with the left hand instead of the right. It just moves right in and steals your part of the couch without asking first. How rude.
Crazy Isn't So Bad Though
I certainly learned my lesson.
I was sitting down for a coffee the other day when I noticed my voice telling me to do some nasty stuff.
At first I just thought it was my imagination running wild. I have an entire herd of buffalo up there in brainland all stampeding around and eating the grass. Tough to keep them inline and out of trouble.
“...should probably just kill that guy over there.”
I heard me say that, then I paused. I wasn't sure if I actually said it with my inside voice, or my outside voice. I looked around the coffee shop. Nobody was looking at me as if I were a crazy person as of yet. Then I heard it again.
I'm not a murderer. I'll defend myself, even if that means throwing the first punch, but murder? Since when? And for what?
Only a crazy person would just stand up and kill someone for no reason.
That's how I've thought for my entire life. So what the hell is going on? I sip my coffee. The guy looks at me. A brief lock of the eyes. At that moment, I realized I had been staring at the man throughout this entire thought process. I may have been focused on his chin though because of this massive, hairy brown spot that lived there. Of course, him seeing me glaring at that mark probably wouldn't make things any better between the two of us.
I thought it was over. Was thinking about finishing up and taking off anyway.
“...watch him. He's dangerous. He'll get you if you don't get him first.”
My voice won't shut up at this point. One demented thought after another....
“...kill him.”
“...he's not actually reading that newspaper.”
“...get rid of him. Don't just leave. Take care of him. Save these people.”
“...Swing swing swing! Chop chop chop!”
“...can I get a double McMurder and a Coke to go?”
“...will somebody please take my order!”
“...Mahna Mahna
Do doo be-do-do
Mahna Mahna
Do do-do do
Mahna Mahna
Do doo de-do-do de-do-do de-do-do de-d.”
“...Chopper. Sick balls!”
“...Uh-oh! Here he comes! Made you look! Ha!”
“...Gimme a K!
K!
...Gimme an I!
I!
...Gimme an L!
L!
...Gimme another L!”
This is the part where I finally snap.
One Public Meltdown
Coming up!
Clearly, I was losing my mind and the control was soon to follow. I got up from my chair with the force of three G's, knocked the table with my knee which in turn sent the rest of my coffee and a few bagel chunks flying through the air, all while firing out with the full extent of my final breath...
L!
It was too late. Three shots already rang out. Two hit me, I was fading fast and all I could think about was how I was the guy who got shot and yelled, “L,” instead of something normal like, “No” in slow motion.
I'm a statistic now, I suppose. Number one of eleven that day. Twelve if you include the coward. Add me to the pile and sweep it under the rug like the rest.
So What Happened Next?
I rode the elevator all the way to the top floor, if you know what I mean. What were my options? Listen to the voices? Make the news as the most recent nutcase who up and kills someone for no reason other than, "The voices told me to..."?
Yeah. I'm sure they'd throw me a parade for that one.
The thing is, I wasn't going crazy on my final day. That wasn't a demon taking residence inside my brain. It was my hunter. My intuition. My human nature. That's why the buffalo got spooked. I was trying to tell me something, but forgot how to read the signs.
In the days of fast food at the local wifi hotspot, who has time to listen to their obsolete, stone wielding, old fashioned self?
Not me, not the other eleven. The manager was nowhere in sight. Employees were focused on their tasks. Everyone inside their own little bubbles. Car after car whipping by. Nobody stopped that day.
The road is paved now. You can walk it barefoot. There's no need to pay attention to anything. Life will do it for you. Fully automatic. Just keep waiting for it to happen.
Anyway
This place never sleeps. I think I'll head out there, do some mingling. There are so many interesting people here. I'll introduce you all someday, but until then...
TTFN Ta Ta For Now
That was so amazingly well written. Thought provoking and mind blowing. All together fucking outstanding!
Interesting to think what’s programmed into that hunk of meat and juices. Evolution and survival and what not.
Dude! ...glad you enjoyed it.
@nonameslefttouse this post was presented at the most recent Pimp Your Post Thursday on the Steemit Ramble Discord. I have written a post to share your featured post. Just stopping back to let you know that you can see your name in lights right here. (Just kidding about the lights :)
i was completely in a different world damm you just tricked my mind lol
Went down that rabbit hole and couldn't get out, hey? I'm glad you enjoyed it.
:D
I have no idea if i should be scared or inspired. FML 😩 But yes....excellent..writing...
That's a perfect reaction though! Thanks.
Dude where have you been??? I'd given up on seeing you again my friend! Welcome Home!!!
I been oot and aboot like those eastern Canadians say. Out and about. Might be an answer for you in my previous post. I just started back up again over the weekend.
Good to see you buddy!
I like that top picture... Looks a bit like my former father in law! I wrote a book by the way!
That is some next level writing, sir. I like how it explores the primal unconscious underpinnings of our state of mind.
Thanks for reading and the resteem. Seems a bit quiet in here today. I've been sitting on this one for awhile. Was hoping people would see it.
I posted it earlier in Steemspeak channel and I've posted it in Shadowspub's Steemit Ramble. On Thursday I'll bring it up in the 'Pimp Your Post Thursday' voice chat.
Hopefully we can get everyone's attention back on your writing again.
The weekend is over I guess. :-)
Everyone is back at work. They will be home later in the evening. Hopefully, your post will be visible then.
That's awesome and exactly the help I need. It's difficult for me to find the time to get out there and flyer the parking lot these days. I'll buy you a coffee for that one, with this vote. Enjoy!
Chopper sick balls, definite LOL on that one. Did you ever see the made for t.v. version where they butchered that movie by taking out half the swears? They changed balls to kid..chopper sick kid, made absolutely no sense, the whole point of that scene was the terror that the dog was trained to gnaw on young boys dangly bits.
Anyway L happens to be a fantastic letter. In my humble opinion. lol. I just got back from a very long ass drive to fredonia to deliver grapevines. I literally just kicked on my computer and got comfy, then decided to pull up your page. He's back, I think, might have some kind of fun, crazy shit for me to read and forget the monotony of the day.
I don't think I've ever met a censor who understands a crisp delivery. Take one tiny word away because you don't like it, the entire thing falls apart. Censors tend to ruin most things they touch. I still don't mind when they blur out hairy plumber crack though. Nothing worse than coming around the corner and meeting up with Assface.
Aww. Jeeze, you know I've missed you when i'm getting nostalgic about assface, haha! Yep, blurring out hairy plumber crack is a censor's one claim to fame.
Good post.
the post is great ........////////
That's far beyond my imagination truly marvelous writing skills you got i need to start following you for more such amazing posts :)