Whenever we happen to get angry or hurt to such an extent that we lose control over our emotions and burst out displaying our emotions through words and gestures, it takes a lot of time to regain the natural state and even if we do, it will still take a lot of days to get over that state of mind.
Then comes the question - is it not a burden? Are we not being slaves of emotion and our own ego? Ego can be so delusional that it will make us think that we are the victims and we go on to believe that others are completely wrong.
So, what is the solution?
Of course, we are not saints and probably never will be.
It is never easy to get out of the social norms and usual scenarios and think out of the box. That is why most people who try to be different than the common guy are social failures as can be studied from the lives of some great people.
If we think differently, we are silenced and made to follow the usual. Some people are made while others break. A do or die situation. Some take to leading nomadic lives and by the time they realize that the grass is not greener on the other side, their lives are spent and they just live the rest of their lives without any stronghold as they have little foundation.
So, is it not justified to become angry?
Of course, anger is just an emotion that stems from the deep hurts that have been buried inside. It is harmful too not to express emotions. It is just that we should let our feelings be known otherwise, they will build up like a snowball and cascade down, causing destruction.
Coming back to the ego, don't let it fool you because the ego is something that blinds you and prevents you from seeing the other person's point of view.
The first step is to realize that others too have opinions and viewpoints and they too deserve to be heard.
The second step is to embrace differences. No two people are the same.
The third step is to respect others. Simple as that.
The fourth is to never give up on self-confidence. If you are not confident about yourself, then others will never respect you.
The fifth is to learn to say NO to things you do not agree to.
If we learn to live harmoniously with ourselves, then others will comply and life will be easier to live on a day-to-day basis.
It is time, we all gave up the usual patriarchal and matriarchy stuff that has been going down generation after generation. Technology has made living life much easier. Adjust and cope with modern advances and live accordingly rather than cling to the old outdated social norms that just help to stifle new ideas and lives.
I am not an anarchist or a feminist. I am just a person who has seen people for who they are.
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This is a great piece you have brought here today, honestly, sometimes we are trapped into our own emotion which shouldn't be so, one need to be mindful of their reasons because once your state of mind change, it would take long before you get your real self.
I see this in a situation that happened to my friend few days ago, he was having a quarrel in his work place although everything was settled but he was still having difficulties to flow again with himself, as he uses to do, so when I visited him, I was the one who tried to let him forget about the situation since their Boss has already settled it in the office, he should continue to be cheerful again.
Yes, so right. It will take time to be happy again.
Great content sayee and plenty of food for thought here! I really believe that if a person cannot accept or love himself, neither can others. The majority of the toxic people I encounter in my life it was crystal clear that they have a lot of problems on their own and they just released some of their pressure on others.
Thank you and yes, you are so right.
EGO spoils everything, literally everything.
The more we let it to grown in ourselves, the more damage it does.
On the steps you mentioned, I think that the first two are most crucial to deal with our ego, hearing someone else's point of view won't cost us anything, maybe we have a good proposal but what the harm in embracing a better one if available. There are many times when I have seen better opinions than I haven't expected and they did yield better results too.
Well, the last point of yours, to learn to say NO to things which I don't agree with is the place where I lack miserably. Often there are things that I should have avoided for my self-interest but I end up doing and later I regret not denying them.
Btw well written, it was a good read.