The alarm rings, noise floods my ears and yet it’s so quiet… here we are again, alone.
Twenty-five days passed since I last spoke to you my friends, and they were beautiful. Yes I’m alone once more, right now my fiancée is sleeping and recovering from her long travel back to Russia. And yet it feels like a new dawn to me, even with all this distance between us I look at my left hand and feel closer to her than ever before. Even though I am sad I can no longer hold her in my arms I refuse to let it fill my heart, a new chapter of our lives has started today and we will face it with our heads and spirits held high!
Today marks the start of the next journey we must undertake, but before we start this journey I would like to share some moments of one of the best days in my life, the day @reinikaerrant said YES!
I got ready in the airport parking, didn't want the shirt to get crooked form the drive :D
It was a lot of waiting around, and checking flight radar on the phone. The board was surprisingly heavy to keep up for half an hour.
but once i saw her face, all discomfort was immediately forgotten <3
She did want to read the question again, just to be sure she read right ;)
We headed home and she opened the gates of our house, the way to the finale.
Here I took a knee and asked the woman of my life to join me, for the rest of ours, together.
And all was good in our universe <3
Now I want to show you the road we will be taking for this journey my friends and I would be honored if you would keep us company along the way. We are both about to enter and navigate the administrative maze that is getting married with someone who does not live on the same patch of ground some king or leader once pronounced to be his country.
At the same time I will need to get a visa for my travels to Russia, which seems to be an adventure all on its own from what I read online. Next to all this we still have to plan our next time together during the holidays in December, I need to start getting our house in order and furnished so we have a place to call our own, and I may have planned a little surprise for her during that time again… I could not resist.
The plan is that she will return on the 22th of December to celebrate Christmas and New year together. That leaves us with 5 weeks and 5 days before we hold each other again. A shorter time then last time, but we have way more to do as well. I miss her immensely, but together we will overcome any struggle we face.
Today we leave the past behind so we can focus on the future. Today we die to the past, so we can live fully now. Not because the past wasn’t important, but because the future, our life is more important. Holding on to something we can’t change is insanity. We will let go of it, so we can live.
We could focus on all that is wrong in our life. We could play the victim card, we have every right to curse the world for putting us in this position. Why should we struggle for every touch and others do it freely. Why should we be apart while others take for granted having their loved one by their sides. But we believe we need to go through all of this to become humans that can rise above setbacks in life. To rise above the negativity, rise above everything.
We can’t have courage if we didn’t have to fight through our fears. We can’t have strength if we didn’t had to get up time and time again when life knocked us down. We can’t have compassion without suffering. We can’t help others if we have never felt helpless.
We chose to leave our past behind, we decided our future is more important than holding on and saying why us, why us… NO, now we say try us. Life tested us and we won. Life will be back, life will test us again, but now we know we have the strength to overcome. We are strong, so much stronger then we give ourselves credit for. Today we leave our past behind so we can focus on our bright future.
This is Wolf of Sarcasm signing off.
~ End of day 79 ~
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