I just read an interesting article on MSN Money about how a lady shared her bank account with her new husband. According to her, sharing this information creates openness and trust. She states that they do not ever argue about money since they both have similar savings goals. She states that her husband makes more money than her, but that does not make him feel like he has more say in the spending or make her feel inferior at times.
I bring this up, because I often find that most couples have 1 of 3 paths they take.
- Share it all. All the paychecks go into the same account, all birthday money goes into the same account etc.
- Share some. I.E. both partners put in either the same amount, or a percentage of their income into a shared account, and any additional above that goes into private accounts.
- Share all, but private allowances. All money goes into 1 account, but then each person gets a set amount each month to move to their own private account to do with as they please.
It always fascinates me to learn the small variations people use of the above. It is even more interesting learning why couple choose one of them. I know for my family, we use option 2. This has kept us motivated to succeed individually and therefore increase our total quality of life. We do create a budget, and then as a percentage of our income, we factor in who pays for healthcare, childcare FSA (flexible spending account) , health care FSA and then each put our remaining share into the pool.
This has worked, and we have been able to avoid any problems with the others spending since we mostly have no idea what the other spends. We do review our budget, and our retirement funds. Beyond that we support each other in times of need.
This give me the freedom to invest in real estate, Crypto, stocks, etc. a new TV I really wanted and saved for nearly 2 years for, and firearms. It allows me to treat my family to dinner, and entertainment that we dont have budgeted for etc. It allows my wife to buy the clothes, shoes, cars, etc that she enjoys spending money on without my questions of dont you have a dress similar to that, or the same shoes in a different shade of gray, or what is wrong with your car, so why do you need a newer one??
I have friends who swear that option 1 is best for their family, but then we hear that each of them hides extra income from the other due to trust, or desire to surprise the other, or just because they want to save more than the other person. This to me means they are lying to each other and themselves which is a slippery slope.
I would love to hear others who have chosen one, or have a new take, or have failed due to their method. Divorce is almost more common than marriage anymore, and money is the biggest driver of divorce last I checked. I love to hear the good, the bad, and the different.
Lastly, if you have not had this conversation with your spouse/significant other let me know what is stopping you, maybe I can help get the conversation started.
Great article. It gives me an interesting opinon on or if I get married one day. How I would treat income.