I so appreciate you speaking up @firststeps. <3 There are days when I wouldn't want anyone to be able to imagine what I feel. Not to give myself a corner on suffering – only to say that...it's too damn much and I'm grateful most people around me aren't able to feel it, even in their heads.
In fact, for way too long, I did my best to conceal it, in part because I didn't want to appear weak or be perceived as attention-seeking. Though I'm more honest with those closest to me about it, I still feel the strangest sense of guilt any time I speak about it aloud or am incapable of concealing the physical strain. I'm not sure that'll ever go away.
I do hope I've inspired you to also share your own story. It's vulnerable to do so, yet so nourishing to be heard and to know that – folks like you might hear and appreciate and, perhaps, feel ever so slightly less alone.
I also tend to hide my pain. It seems to be common among those with Fibro. I’m beginning to think that this trait might also contribute to our condition. I think we all need to just let it out one way or another. Whether it’s screaming, explaining, talking, crying, writing, singing, or whatever. Our oain needs a voice. It may not lessen it but I feel it helps us deal with it better.
I agree. shoving it down and trying to shut it up only makes it scream that much louder. Let it out!