You know, I don’t really get bothered by the way other people frame the world, it’s when their framing becomes part of the cultural narrative and I get sucked into conversations where I am not really allowed to speak my language anymore that drives me nuts.
Haha thanks for the understanding. I don’t feel bad about it, I’m just trying to be better and better where I don’t feel “triggered” by others and ave full control of my reaction, even if my reaction is to call someone a coccsucker....I didn’t call her that though! I just said that’s how those words feel to me.
Haha I get you. I know the feeling you are talking about. I wrote my last post about one of things that sets me off sometimes in fact.
As long as you are aware how you react you can make an effort to control it a little more. I was pretty good at keeping my cool when I was forced to work in groups but there was one time where I came damn close to assaulting someone over it. I could handle the fact that half of the people didn't pull their weight and that some tried to live out their control fetish in the lamest setting ever but on that occasion an individual altered my work without my knowledge the day of a presentation and left me without functional notes. I didn't end up hitting him but I did rip his notes out of his hand and I never gave them back so we both had to wing it that day lol. That was childish of me but I got pushed a little too far I guess. Trying is the important part even if it doesn't always work and you seem to have that down.
I probably would have made a scene "before I talk about ----- I'd like to bring attention to the fact that a turd faced idiot known as -------- has made sure my hard work has been for nothing"
I think it's most favorable to act angry when you actually just want to make a point or to feel angry without letting it affect your actions. I might have done the same thing as you and I don't know if I'd feel bad about it. It really depends on whether you are doing it out of respect for yourself or disrespect for them.
That would have worked too lol. Yeah there is a bit more to that story I had been fed up with that guy for a few days leading up to that incident it worked out for me better than him in the end. I was a slacker through my younger years so I had developed my ability to bullshit my way through assignments like that and he hadn't. Whether I took his notes out of some kind of self respect is another question. I would have actually given them back if he was willing to ask but I think he saw that I was on the edge of violence and he didn't want to push his luck.
He was a wealthy hipster who dressed homeless because he thought it was fashionable. He would do beginner's yoga poses in public where all the regular people were just trying to smoke or have some coffee and then do that judgmental cough so we would all know how much our 'lifestyles" offended him. So before we both got put in a group to give a 15 - 30 minute presentation on King Lear, I already wanted to huck a brick or two at him. Anyway, the group met twice and he got it in his head that he was the "leader." He tried to dictate what everyone would talk about. The nineteen year old kids that made up most of the group just went with it but I refused to change my work to fit his vision (I was on topic but I was not going to make his case for him). The presentation came the next day and one the others in the group showed me the final printout of the power point (which he "accidentally" forgot to send me) and all the information I was supposed to cover was replaced with the garbage he wanted me to cover. You can see, that there was a build-up to me mugging him for his notes.
I agree with you on reserving anger for when it is called for or when it has an effect for sure, though.