You're right about your life and your desires being more synonymous than people realize. One massive misconception about spirituality, realization, Nirvana, karma, consciousness, etc. is that it SHOULD improve you somehow or benefit you in some way. That is just your ego looking for another leg up and completely side steps the point
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I think the misconception happens because of the popularity of the mainstream teachers. The ones I respect plainly say (and said) that there is no difference between them and us, and that self-realization doesn't offer an advantage in life. But their popularity makes it seem like it's their self-realization that got them popular. So people who want to be like them seek self-realization and continue seeking without end since it doesn't get them the results they want.
Agreed, @chrisrice. Ego can very quickly derail a spiritual practise... be it 'oh look at me and how long I can sit quuetly on a cushion' to 'that person in my yoga class does not look as flexible as me. I must get more flexible to be a better yogi'.
Very very true, there is a cost to all things