Why there is a lack of self-confidence and how to overcome it

in #psychology7 years ago

Low self esteem has been scientifically studied and the findings of the research helped inform the facts. Because of what there is a lack of self-confidence in a personality and how to overcome it systematically. The reasons may be bad experiences in the past or childhood memories.


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Because of what there is uncertainty

Past mistakes

They greatly change our attitude to ourselves, especially if something serious has happened, for example a serious break in relations or dismissal from work. But the past can not be changed. Do not get hung up on old mistakes. Take a lesson from them, otherwise you will waste time.

Education

If the parents were always unhappy with you, and the teachers judged you only on the basis of estimates, you could learn the habit of doubting yourself from childhood. But now you are an adult, and this is only your life. You no longer need to seek the approval of parents and teachers.

Comparing yourself with others

We compare ourselves with colleagues who are more than us. With bloggers in social networks, who live more interesting than us. As a result, we are disappointed and angry with ourselves. The solution to the problem is completely trivial - learn to appreciate yourself. We are all different, we all understand different things.

And yet sometimes it's useful to compare yourself with others. Note which qualities you lack, and develop them.

An unfamiliar situation

You do not know how to react and what to expect from the situation. Naturally, there is a lack of self-confidence. Use this as an opportunity to learn something new. Once you did not know how to walk, but now you are quite good at it. Remind yourself that it is normal to make mistakes. Thanks to mistakes we learn.

Success in the past

With it comes the fear that you will never do anything better. Do not think how to repeat this success. Think about how to outdo yourself. Let you know something well, still have somewhere to grow. Develop your strengths.

How to get rid of uncertainty

Think of a good


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If you notice negative thoughts, focus on something positive. Prepare something in advance that will help you tune in to a positive mood. For example:

  • The list of counterarguments: "I will succeed", "This is an opportunity to learn something new", "I'm just wasting my time, doubts will not change anything."
  • The list of counterarguments: "I will succeed", "This is an opportunity to learn something new", "I'm just wasting my time, doubts will not change anything."
  • List of happy memories.
  • A folder with photos that make you smile.
  • A list of actions that charge you with energy.
  • Useful food, which you can quickly eat.

Change Activity

The longer you focus on one emotion, the more difficult it is to get rid of it. Relax and do something else. You will stop thinking about the unpleasant and look at everything from the other side.

Ask for help

Supporting relatives, friends or a leader will help in a difficult situation. And their advice will give a charge of confidence and motivation.

Keep records

Each week, write down what makes you doubt yourself. So you determine what causes uncertainty and how to overcome it. Also write down what you are thankful for. You will begin to appreciate yourself more and focus on what you have.

How to regain confidence in three weeks


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  • First week. Every day, write down three things that you are thankful for. Gradually you will notice that in your life there are many reasons for joy. At the end of the week, review the entire list again.
  • Second week. Write down the situations in which you doubt yourself, and the possible causes of uncertainty. By the end of the week you will determine your basic fears. Think about how to deal with them, what to change.
  • The third week. Write down what you did to overcome uncertainty and how you feel. No matter how small your steps are, it's still a victory. You are a little closer to the goal.


Thanks for reading. All images are from pixabay.com.

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I like the contents. The method described for 3 weeks, is quite valuable.

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Being confident about oneself is very important for success in all human endeavour. I love the 3 week call to action to regain self confidence

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