Hey guys , today here on steem i would like to start with a story.
There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily, gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.
The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said "you have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one.'"
You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there. Make sure you control your temper the next time you are tempted to say something you will regret later.So emotional intelligence is very important.
The ability to use your emotions in a positive way is called Emotional Intelligence. Emotions are very intangible. we know that we have differently on different things. Sometimes we will be angry and sometimes we feel unhappy some times we even cry. These things entirely depends on our emotional intelligence. While emotions are intangible, there are some measures that you can practice to be emotionally balanced.
Daniel Goleman is one of my favourite authors . He is an internationally known psychologist. In his book on emotional intelligence, he explained many things on this. I am very inspired after reading that book. His book was on The New York Times bestseller list for one-and a half year, with more than 50,00,000 copies in print worldwide in 40 languages, and has been a best seller in many other countries too.
Emotional Intelligence, that it is the level of your ability to identify, use, understand, and manage emotions in positive ways to achieve success in your day to day work, studies, business and relationships
-Daniel Goleman
The emotions are very intangible we know that we have differently on different things. Sometimes we will be angry and sometimes we feel unhappy some times weeven cry. These things entirely depends on our emotional intelligence. While emotions are intangible, there are measures you can take to be emotionally balanced. I explained some important thingsthat everyone should follow to become emotionally stable.
Emotional Quotient (EQ)
IQ is the tool to measure intelligence quotient.Similarly,trainers measure emotional intelligence through the test of EQ . emotional intelligence impacts many different aspects of daily life such as altering attitude, accepting
change,communicating, accepting difficulties as challenges and resolving conflicts. In the present scenario, every one of us should practice this technique and change the way to behave and the way to interact with others interact with others.
The management gurus reiterate that emotional intelligence can be learned and strengthened,no body has inborn emotional intelligence. when a child cries, shouts with unknown negative emotions, the mother should understand the reason for his cry. For example, if your father or teacher is angry, it might mean that he is dissatisfied with your performance or the marks you obtained.
I feel that we need to develop some attributes to develop emotional intelligence. There are many things that we need to know. Here i wanted to explain you some factors that help u to develop emotional intelligence.
Self-awareness:
The ability to know one's emotions, strengths, weaknesses, and how they affect the thoughts and behaviour. It is suggested that one should identify his SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats) and analyse honestly so as to take better decisions.
Self-regulation:
This is the ability to manage impulsive feelings and behavior. It involves controlling or redirecting one's negative emotions and impulse and adapting to changing circumstances. You have to take initiative design regulations and follow thoroughly with commitment according to the changing circumstances around.
Social skill:
This is nothing but recognising others emotions. As we feelings, impulses, and different attitudes, you have to understand that other people around you in the family, school, office have the same. This will avoid conflicts.
Relationship management:
It is the intelligence of how you use the first three emotional intelligence skills to interact with other people. This involves good rapport with others: managing negative emotions like jealousy, anger and prejudices, etc. You have to develop the skill of converting negative emotions into positive to manage crisis in life.
These things have changed the way of living of many people and these things are not abstract. The things that mentioned above are drawn from the experiances of many people.
Emotional intelligence can be increased as these are not natural talents, but rather learned capabilities that must be worked on and can be developed to achieve outstanding performance. He opines that individuals are born with a general emotional intelligence that determines their potential for learning emotional competencies and hence they can practice and upgrade their emotional intelligence levels. People can get rid of their emotional hijacking, which they acquired because of nature, nurture, negative dimension of understanding and relationship building in their work assignments.Psychologists recommend a dozen ideas to strengthen your emotional intelligence in day-to-day practice.
Listen attentively:
while communicating with others, pay attention to what the person is saying and understand.
Positive affirmations
Feed the mind with positive mental attitude consistently. This mental attitude converts your negative mental attitude into positive attitude
Notice the body language:
While talking to others, observe their body language as a it conveys complete meaning of what the person says.
Communicate effectively:
Practice communication which pleases others depending upon the situation
Empathy:
Instead of showing sympathy on others, develop the habit of stepping into their shoes and understand them. It makes you feel the real suffering. Extend emotional support
Manage stress:
Practice relaxation techniques and manage your stress through physical, mental and spiritual exercises. Practice Self Hypnotism techniques to manage your stress which I will be writing in my next blog.
Observe your own emotions:
Observe how you respond in emotional situations. Seek feedback from close companions and alter body language accordingly
Role model:
Fly with eagles rather than scratching with the turkeys' is an old saying. Similarly, associate with winners and positive people and learn life's lessons.
Teach others:
Teach your friends how to increase emotional intelligence, so that while you teach to others your subconscious mind listens and help you to follow what you teach.
Humour:
Jokes and cartoons and playful communication relieve fatigue relax your body, which allows you to recharge and accomplish more
Be smart:
The variety of people you deal with everyday are not of the same attitude. Notice the difference, and adapt to changes and be flexible in your communication.
Forget and forgive:
Don't enter into confrontation with others on petty issues which will disturb your relationship with them. Try to forget and when you cannot forget, forgive them.
I hope these things help you develop emotional intelligence and help individual grow better psychologically. Our final motive would be staying cool and happy. Our ancestors did not practice all these things. But at present situation due to various changes in aspects of human living. Every individual need to know some techniques of emotional intelligence or he should prepare some techniques on his own to avoid problems and to stay fit emotionally.
i hope that you guys like this writing and if u want to see more of my updates follow me @bharathpreetham. If u have any doubts or if u wanna add some more things that make this post better one u can comment them below. Always becool and stay healthy are my priciples.keep smiling guys..
The pictures i used were taken from pixabay.com under creativecommons
If u want to read my introduction post please go through this link :
https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@bharathpreetham/my-journey-began-on-steemit-here-is-the-story
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Wat a coincidence i saw another post on emotional intelogence today...gud one...
thank you @steemflow ..i felt many of us lack in that ,so i tried writing that..help it reach more people
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Nice story you give
hey thanks @lavanyalakshman .