My grandma used to tell me that life back in the day was tough. Most couples used to have as many children as possible so they could help around. The young members of the family were seen more or less as a financial asset since extra working hands for the fields was the most valuable commodity. Thus, families made sure to have at least half dozen children each. Due to the harsh conditions and lack of medication each family also lost children. To my surprise, my grandma told me that parents weren't affected as much since it was considered rather normal for the day.
It was this notion that got me into thinking about the nature of psychological trauma. Parents in most western countries would feel devastated if they lost a child. The reason being is rather obvious. Unlike the past, modern medicine has enabled us to have longer lifespans. Child mortality has become unacceptable. The experience becomes traumatic because we compare the negative event of the loss of a child that happens only to us and not to others.
I am a fan of the show "The Walking Dead". I don't fancy much the zombie theme but rather the anthropological aspects of a community trying to survive. In the show, every surviving individual has lost many people close to them. Almost always, they got to kill the zombie versions of their friends. Although people seemed to be quite traumatized in the beginning in the first season, this changed slowly as more and more people were having a similar traumatic experience. Fast forward a few seasons later on, and they all got desensitized to killing zombies or even losing someone close to them. Life and death were not seeing so far apart since death was not only expected but also welcomed.
We can observe similar behavior in elderly homes. Old people don't seem to care that much due to the understanding of their situation. Their children don't mind much either. They expect that they will die since slowly they have been losing all their friends. They know the end is inevitable. In contrast, we don't see this behavior in clinics with children that have leukemia. Their parents are torn apart even if the children don't quite grasp their own death. Not many children get to die so young from such a horrible disease.
source
Rape victims also experience this form of trauma. They realize the gravity of the situation only when they grow old and understand what happened to them. They compare their experience with how culture perceives normal sexual behavior and they are torn apart. It is hypothesized that if children were not introduced to the cultural aspect of rape and normal sexual behavior they wouldn't feel traumatized. Even those who end up abusing children sexually, most often, they are repeating the same experience that happened to them. It was the first sexual experience they had so in their world it registered as normative.
Soldiers having Post Traumatic Stress Disorder suffer from something similar. War introduces someone to horrific imagery and actions that cannot be processed accordingly when coming back to a healthy society. Almost everything looks like a dream. This is the main reason most veterans find it so hard to adjust while people who remain in the field seem to accept the reality of the situation. The traumatic experience is not so much the event itself but rather the transition and comparison one makes to a healthy environment.
We often wonder why spoiled children that live in luxurious neighborhoods have "silly" traumas. To them they are certainly not. A child might be comparing themselves with multimillionaire children. If his parents make only 6 figures then the child will feel inferior. The measure by which we compare makes all the difference. Similarly, if we take a western child to a poor African neighborhood they will be devastated even if they have all the necessities to stay alive. And let us not forget that from their perspective, we are the spoiled ones.
Psychological trauma is nothing more than how we measure our life experiences to those around us. If something bad happens to us and not to others then we are devastated. In time, if something bad happens to everyone then it passes unnoticeable. Self-help groups work so well because one's environment becomes normalized. No matter what kind of bad experience one has, someone is there to share a similar story.
We are social animals. Comparing ourselves to others is inevitable. The majority of psychological disorders do stem from a lack of connection. We perceive our world being much different from those around us. Technology plays a major role to this since everyone has become a unique individual, able to digest tons of different material and thus create a completely new narrative.
Unfortunately there is no solution to this. The middle path doesn't cut it. Medication and therapy don't help either and this the reason psychological disorders seem to spread like a growing epidemic. We could sacrifice our individuality by being groupies but then we will become sheeple. We could choose to be groupies to relate to everyone but our minds will understand the hypocrisy and hit us back. We can't really fool ourselves. No doubt, hive minds are healthier even if they appear nuttier to the rest of us.
There is a reason loners suffer from depression and anxiety. There is a reason almost all of us are becoming loners as well. We are slowing being cut off from the world because we abundant information crafts our own unique reality. Every experience for us can be traumatic in comparison to others. Nobody can understand us because we are way too much into our own selves. When we occasionally measure ourselves to others, we panic.
As long as we are bound to our biological bodies and technology keeps increasing, psychological traumas will only become more prevalent.
I had the pleasure of knowing my great grandmother, who was born in 1892 and died in 1991, just 4 days after her only son died and 6 months before her 100th birthday. One thing I remember about her was how much joy she found in the simple things. Life in general was simpler back then, and the stories she told were always about family and community, rare commodities these days.
Someone from her era being dropped in to todays world would likely be traumatized by the way we live now, just generally. Not having been desensitized with the incremental changes over the passage of time.
this is so true.
Mi bisabuela nació en el 1900 y murió con 94 en 1994 y mi abuela ahora tiene 90 años y porque no ve bien, pero son lo mas grande, las historias de la guerra! yo firmaba ya para estar como mi abuela que tiene tantas ganas de vivir, que no me imagino que por su edad un día por resfriado como le paso a su madre se vaya!
te mando saludos, soy nuevo por aquí.
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Thank you kindly. Yes I've certainly seen a lot of the Follow For Follow mentality and have steered quite clear of that approach.
I am of the opinion that my content alone should attract followers and if that means I am slow to obtain them but I end up with a more content-driven follower base then I'm all the richer for it.
In fact the very fact that I am discerning was my motivation for announcing myself to you in the first place as following is not something that I tend to do trivially.
Again, thank you for your considered input and I look forward to looking up to your reading expectations 👍
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I see you're new like me and something about this intrigued me so i joined. It's not too late if it interested you too. I don't even know why I'm telling you this, oh well.
Another top post @kyriacos. What you're talking about here is a calibration of perspective. For many years now based on my observations of those I see in the real world, I've remarked to myself that I am glad that I'm not young at this time.
That sounds a bit funny I'm sure to the casual reader but as I observe young school children walking in packs, all heads down on their phones, breaking the trance only to remark to a neighbouring student about something on their display, I can't help but see fragility.
When one's entire social ecosystem and along with it one's entire calibrated view of what constitutes acceptable, good, desirable, undesirable, shocking or normal comes from an Internet connection & in many cases online friends, then any destruction in that mechanism would be perceived as a traumatic event.
Consider the basic example of your mobile phone battery going flat whilst everyone around you continues to live online.
Continuing with this student example, and without the appropriate life experience, this would be a world ending event.
Thank you for the insight and the thought provoking material as usual
@nolnocluap
well said
A lot of people who survived the Great Depression were traumatized, they just have different ways of showing it. My grandmother never throws anything away that she perceives as useful. She justifies saving gum wrappers to use as scrap paper the way I glorify my kitchen drawer of extra fast food condiments (I grew up without a lot of money). We excuse it as having a "waste not, want not" attitude, but it's really grounded in trauma. The reason they didn't "go on about it" was because of the stigma associated with mental health.
My grandfather served in World War II, Korea, and Vietnam, and he never once went to therapy for PTSD. That doesn't mean he wasn't affected by it--I know from his candid veteran-to-veteran talks with me that he was. For most traumatized people in earlier generations, the mental health system was worse than what ailed them, so they kept their struggles to themselves. No one wanted to be institutionalized.
Some of what you discuss here is reminiscent of cognitive processing therapy. Are you familiar with that course of treatment for trauma survivors?
Excellent point about the mental stigma and not wanting to be institutionalized. People were also tougher back then, meaning they dealt with things in a way most didn't see there was a problem, and today people cry the same think about because they don't have to deal with much. Teacup generation. Need safe spaces.
I am not aware actually. I consider modern psychotherapy pretty much useless. Indeed, people in the past used to learn how to deal with their own problems. Today most people got spoiled and are getting dependent on some kind of "Free ride". they don't want to go through the processes of "toughening" themselves.
Humans are "difference machines" -- absolutes don't motivate or impact us, we only notice differences. So our entire lives are framed from the perspective of reacting to things that are different -- the more different they are, the more we either thrill or chill at the sensation of that difference. That's why the horror movie industry exists, why the thrill ride industry exists, why entertainment has to keep getting more violent and realistic in order to keep us interested, and why drug use tends to accelerate. Our neurons adapt to whatever they are exposed to.
I think that humans are designed to live in small groups. As groups get too large, anonymity starts to emerge and humans can't handle anonymity well. We need privacy, where no one is looking at our actions, but can't handle anonymity, which is where we can take actions without having to be responsible for the consequences.
Humanity is getting ready for its next cycle. The old order of industrialization is on its last legs --- industrialized medicine, education, government, economy -- these are all under strain and will collapse.
What will emerge with the help of 3D printers, decentralized crypto money, and disconnected power generation capabilities will be the new world -- what I call the "Techno-Agrarian world." Still connected through the internet and probably connected through a decentralized peer to peer internet system, but no longer trying to get "jobs" -- instead, you will make your own stuff and grow your own food. This world will reward small groups, and I think we will see that psychologically this will be much more healthy for us.
This is really well put. You should make a post about it.
Great article. Reminded me of my great grandma. She say things like "I dont know if we didn't have since enugh to be traumatized, or just didn't have the time to; But we sure didnt carry on like people do now a days." Thanks for posting.
Great saying :)
Living in a somewhat rich African city, I see these traumas everyday. Mainly in the way people behave. The population is constantly comparing their daily lives with those seen on TV and Social Media, although we can relate, in a way, there are many aspects missing like complete freedom, security and simply richness. This manifests in the way we behave, the way we think... many are lost. The way we deal with it is pretty horrific. We constantly criticize and judge each other for doing things we are doing too or that we wish we did, to belong. Belong to something we can't quite grasp. Many insecurities and hypocrisy are created from this psychological trauma that you speak of eloquently.
I am glad you are bringing your own experience into the argument. Thank you for sharing this.
At the end, it's all about our perception - isn't it ? The way we perceive, we think. And the way we think, we act. It's all about the spectacles that we're wearing, the lenses through which we see the world.
To some, they are illusions but when most people start believing it, it becomes reality.
yeap, it is all about perception.
Very interesting reading! Makes me wonder how much our feelings are tied to customs and norms in the society surrounding us. Having lived in two different countries has opened my eyes to how different we can react to simular events.
Oh, they are tight up alright...
Living abroad is the one of the biggest eye openers one can go through.
I believe as traumas may seem to appear bigger or we are less fit to deal with reality, the contrary is also thru, our consciousness and ability to thrive, love and care is also bigger.
Our consciousness expands, and as we emerge into bigger realms of it, the gap between the most evolved end the most retarded grows bigger too.
Those, we see people living like 50,000 years ago surviving on their magical-mythical world yet we see enlightened people (real ones, few of them) guiding not so blindly, others with eyes open, willing to evolve and free themselves from suffering and complaining, accepting responsibility for their lives.
Have a great day you all!
You make good points about comparative psychology, it does seem like we use the way other people react to things as a barometer for how we react - including how loudly to complain or how long to linger on an injury.
Although I think its less extreme than you paint it - really extreme trauma like rape or murder shouldn't really be desensitized, it makes sense to be devastated when something horrible happens.
Small stuff though, I think social media and the internet are making it a lot more stressful for everybody.. so much easier to compare to each other.
Some people reassure themselves that, psychotrauma is not so terrible and they can not be reflected in future generations. In fact, Swiss scientists in the early 21st century established that they can affect the genetic code of a person and are inherited.
I've heard that there are confirmations that individuals whose psyche has suffered are unable to provide everything the child needs for psychological well-being and pass on their fears, pain, anxiety, and thus, there is another generation with traumatic psyche.
Oh well... I hope they can move on and look forward confidently.
It makes you wonder though. If psychotrauma is transferrable then every generation becomes exponentially more fucked up. It doesn't quit add up.
Well i'd better keep believing that any shiet that happens makes you stronger. And move forward.
Anyway thanks for your post, i enjoy articles like that!
Whatever doesn't kill you makes you more indifferent.
It was the same in my country, Romania, while communism period
yeap, most poor countries experience this
You projected your spotlight on good Topic
I am also suffering from Anxiety and depression
It eats me daily
Good Topic selection
good luck to you
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This is a great post, I learned a lot. Thanks for sharing and keep on posting ;)
You are welcome.
I think that one's perception is the key. It doesn't really matter what happens to a person . But rather how does that person deal with the matter. Does one see the event/ happening a positive or a negative experience. Perspective is everything. One can see everything in a positive light. Seems cliche, but a negative can easily be turned into a positive. A person must be enlightened to see this form of thinking and in doing so one can find inner peace and freedom to enjoy the world and move on from any perceived calamity.
Indeed. A person's narrative is everything. Thing is, perspectives are created from our environment. This is how we all get trapped.
True that. So hard to break from that environment of agreed upon beliefs/ tenets of a particular culture that all its members are promoting and indoctrinating to each member. A person must break from the norm and actually seek the knowledge t become enlightened. One's foundation will collapse and person will fall before getting up and seeing one's truth and enlightment. Only a few take this trip.
Indeed, the path towards individuality is pretty lonely
Great Article 👍🏻 I completely agree with what you said about more and more people are becoming socially disconnected. Very interesting read.
i think the depression,rape,anxiety and many more can be decreased if parents of a child takes interest in the child daily life
Self imposed exile, lack of human compassion, spiritual disconnect, lack of empathy, are areas that you will also see the PTSD appear. Resteemit to get more chiming in!
thank you
Good article .. Upped and resteemed ..
thank you
I guess we all are prone to these life aspects but sometimes the timing can play a big role in how it affects us. If only this wasn't a norm and not treated like so then maybe there would be a slowing period. But it can break some and yet create some strong durable spirits. As far as the walking dead goes, the show was very good in showing how to survive at first. But if you as me that has taken a drastic nose dive in the last two seasons. Hopefully they can turn things around in the next one.
I still watch the show. I don't mind the plot. kinda irrelevant to me.
My mom's family had 13 kids. My dad's family had 7 kids. There is 9 kids in our family and my dad said it was the hardest thing for him was to lose a child.
Depends where you live I guess
Very informative and spot on article in the world as I see it. It seems that people are staying more to themselves and their devices. I attribute a lot of it to the world being a more dangerous place. I think, also, the way things are perceived is important. I know as a child I would watch my parent's reactions to a trauma to understand how bad it was and how I should react.
well said.
The society altogether is made of many sad people getting together to act like a happy one :(
sadly yes.
If only we can learn to be happy with what we have ...
unlikely to happen
Hmmm...very shocking but good to know..Thanks for this piece
thank you for commenting
Such a great article :)
Thank you for sharing :)
you are welcome
Now that I spent 5 minutes thinking of this,I wonder if most of us over 18 and traumatized by something. My sister tries to be a loner so who I take her to the park I take away the toys and her her play with other kids. We can't have two loners in the family lol
:)
@kyriacos Thanks for This Lovely and Impactful Post . It Touched me deep to heart. Very Real and Nicely Said. I Can easily Coonect this to my daily Life , thanks for bringing out such a underrated topic. Upvoted and Followed. Have a Good Day. :)
glad you like it.
Great post @kyriacos , and so true , things move so fast in our days that we have lost focus of what's important
indeed.
See your post mentioned here
thank you
While you do decent job of outlining some of the common causes of trauma and give some historical context for how the traumatic of loss of a child has changed in recent history, you definition of trauma is a rather poor one.
You state "Psychological trauma is nothing more than how we measure our life experiences to those around us." Traumas are emotional and psychological wounds that are the result of a single event, or a series of (inter-)related events. Your generalization totally ignores the deep impact on a human's neuro-biology that a trauma will cause. There are a whole spectrum of traumatic experiences and the mental/emotional severity that accompanies each will differ according to each individual's coping skills, level of resilience and also often the quality of their support system to get the right kind of help when needed. Healing the damage of traumas often require a good deal of emotional / cognitive reconditioning work. Your definition characterizes trauma as though all that's required for it to go away is for the individual to stop comparing themselves to others and that's it, the problem is solve. That's a completely superficial and inaccurate understanding of the forces, and is not solutions oriented.
Also your final points that there's no answer or solution to the increasing isolation people experience from using social media and "medication and therapy don't help" are absolute over-generalizations. Yes there are limitatations but not cause to dismiss them absolutely. Also you comment "Nobody can understand us because we are way too much into our own selves, " is a cop-out. Yes communication and understanding at the highest level can be very difficult, but if you don't see plenty of examples out there you're not looking hard enough.
To paraphrase a guy who really gets it, 'there's no problem that in the world that human ingenuity, applied properly, can not solve. '
Cheers.
I specify "the origin", not a deeper analysis. Also, I am not ignoring any of that. I actually explain how these unfold.
This is some over-generalising rhetoric.We both know it rarely works. Veterans know this the best. Psychotherapy is more or less social engineering. You just have to believe a different form of narrative.
Actually I am not implying that. Even if I did, I consider it impossible for one to stop comparing themselves to others.
Much like most of your statement above, you are applying rhetorics. You are are not debating properly any of my points. You are talking "politically'.
Very interesting points. I've spent all morning reflecting on your hypothesis that psychological trauma is merely a mechanism of comparing ourselves to others, and, ultimately, I find I have to disagree.
There are many factors that might prevent people from exhibiting symptoms of psychological trauma after an experience such as war, rape, or the death of a child, but that doesn't mean that there was no trauma associated with the event.
In less advanced (or wartorn, or famine-afflicted) societies, where children often die, it is not that the parents do not experience psychological pain at their death that they spend less time grieving or have a more matter-of-fact attitude about it. Just because children are dying all around you does not make the death of your own child any less painful. It's that their lives are an every-day struggle for survival. They can not afford the time and energy for grieving that we in relatively safe places with higher life expectancies tend to feel is necessary. But, not having been able to take the time to grieve and process their emotions about the event, their psychological trauma may manifest in other, seemingly minor ways for the rest of their lives.
I really object to the theory that children who are sexually abused only perceive the experience as trauma from an adult perspective, once they have learned that this is not an experience everyone goes through. This theory pretty much assumes on its face that there is nothing wrong with adult-child sexual relations; that we only dislike it for reasons of irrational, culturally-ingrained aversion. This is patently false. The core reason why we feel an aversion to the idea of adults using young people for sexual pleasure is because it is, fundamentally, an abuse of power that creates psychological trauma, not to mention physical pain and dysfunction for the victim. For a "subordinate" person to have his or her body overpowered by an older, "superior" person, is traumatic. Being controlled is traumatic. Having our individual will defeated is traumatic. Though people with differing constitutions have different ways of dealing with, or masking, this psychological trauma, and can take different amounts of time to do so, it does not change the fact of the underlying trauma. I would argue that in a society where child rape is the norm, individual victims will exhibit lifelong behaviors related to the experience of abuse, even if no one in the culture treats the abuse as legitimate abuse. For instance, they will grow up accepting that they have no power and are just pawns to be played with by those stronger and with greater authority. There will be a higher incidence of abusive marriages, non-sexual child abuse, elder abuse, and possibly suicide.
You bring up the difference between old people in nursing homes and young children in leukemia hospitals as an example to back up your theory. I think you are mistaken here, as well. Elderly people certainly suffer when their friends and loved ones die, just as parents suffer when their children die. It's just that there is an extra layer of regret and poignancy when a child dies, because she or he was at the beginning of their life and their death is a death of potential. Whereas, an older person who nears the end has presumably lived a full life and is dying at the biologically appropriate time.
I'd love to hear thoughts on these counterpoints.
Think about it differently. If you have fear towards spiders, being exposed to them will remove that fear. Same applies to trauma and this is actually very well demonstrated. Any form of psychological trauma if the occurrence of a rare event.
Never implied that. In fact we can see your assumption being wrong in many cultures today (and in the past) where children as young as 11 and 12 were getting married. Humans, whether we like it or not, have their sexual organs mature but that age. Ethics is something humans have applied later one. Google age of consent for example and you will find that it varies massively across countries. Again, I am not advocating for child abuse. I am just stating how humans across the planet are treating the issue.
I would argue that half the "normal" things we considered today as "normal" in 500 years in more advanced societies will be considered abuse since no one will be doing them. Again, the measure here is if everyone is doing it. If a child learns that something is "OK" then they will grow believing that it is. Considering religion for example. People walk with a crucified/tortured individual around their neck. they hang it classrooms. and yet, it is considered "OK".
I used to visit elderly homes and hang our with older people. Sorry, it is much different. Older people do not care that much about death because they have been "slowly trained" to the idea.
Interesting, engaging opinion. It takes people's need 'to fit in' into a rather peculiar level, though. I, on the other hand, would not totally ignore the impact such events have on human neuro-biology as pointed out by @hypnopreneur. Still, it is a good article!
this is just a brough-stroke. it doesn't say anything. it is like saying "quantum consciousness". empty words.
Heavy post. Sad
Guau mis felicitaciones, yo como he contestado al compañero de abajo, estado muchísimos años a mi bisabuela que nació en 1900, y murió con 94 años, decirte que un articulo expectacular, saludos y mi súper voto lo tienes jejejeje
People in the past used to learn how to deal with their own problems, and they can handle it in good ways. People nowadays are trying to live meaningful lives. Its hard, but thats the reality..
You can make something of yourself, even if you have nothing..
we have become "softer" due to the comfortable lifestyles.
Nice and heart touching post by reading your post I just remembered those days when I was with my grandma she was so sweet and teaches me many things also play with me but now she is not with me. Thanks for sharing
yeap! thank you for commenting.
i agree with you, until the last paragraph
As long as we are bound to our biological bodies and technology keeps increasing, psychological traumas will only become more prevalent.
there i think lies the solution. if we use the information available to see what is happening we could steer in the direction we want. isn't this the point of information and technology?
not really. At the end the problem is existential dread. Immortality is torture.
don't know about immortality, never experienced that. in theory i'd agree with you... too much of the same is boring and becomes torture.
couldn't an existential dread be resolved if we could experience more (all the literature and knowledge available a click away and the technology that allow us more time to spend for our whatever we do - the research done on the human body and mind)... search and find, explore and define, expand our horizon to the point where you could say " (I) am" ? (or find an answer that brings you peace?)
I am not sure. perhaps with future technologies we can.
I enjoy reading how you think. This is so true & I agree! @kyriacos