Welllll, a lot of people consider me a very good friend. Because i sit and listen to them, keep my eyes focussed about their ear, and feed their words back to them when they pause.
I have also found that these people do not know me at all.
And some care more about me listening to them than about me not being in pain. (they smoke)
You sound like a natural listener. Have you always been this way or was it a skill that you learned?
It's interesting sometimes when you become quiet and take a step back. The dynamics of relationships shift, or at least our perception of them. I used to be the person who was always reaching out first and I've also stopped doing this as much. Sadly, I learned quickly how one-sided a lot of my friendships were. A lot of humans are self-centered.
I think it was beaten into me by childhood trauma.
And then i have become very meditative.
I do not have a strong personality that i will defend
so, in a way, i am a natural listener.
I even have some "friends" who think they are doing me a favor dumping all of their day's happening on me.
I'm sorry to hear that. I'm not sure what generation you come from but there were still a lot of GenX'rs who were raised to be "seen and not heard" and to blindly respect authority figures. I'm astounded when I look back and realize how our childhoods had more in common with the 1950's than today's society.
It's good that you're a person who is meditative and reflects. We need more of this in the world.
Ugh, I bet that can feel burdensome sometimes. Good listeners often have people flocking to them, I guess because they're so rare? My mom is that way, a lot of people confide in her.