A few months back I realized that there is a huge difference between physical intimacy, sex being a part of that, and emotional intimacy. I wrote a post about this learning experience and it had profoundly touched many people. I share the link to the post as I'm going to build on what I wrote. I would recommend re-reading the post before continuing with this one.
https://steemit.com/ungrip/@wwf/guys-we-are-making-a-big-mistake-that-needs-to-be-remedied
When we start to acknowledge that each of us has this sacred space upon which we experience life, we must also acknowledge that it is our responsibility to protect that space and ensure nobody violates it's sacredness, including ourselves. But to do that requires efforts to heal ourselves, explore what the boundaries are in our lives and find the courage to stand up and say no when somebody violates them
When we interact with other people, not only are we responsible to maintain the sanctity of our sacred space, but we must do the same with others. The problem I find in today's world is that boundaries are not treated with respect, reverence or honour. Within our own marriages and close emotionally intimate relationships, boundaries get crossed and people get hurt. This recently happened to me by some very dear friends of mine whom I loved very much. So what did I do? I confronted the abhorrent behaviour, said good bye to them and walked away.
What shocked everyone is my zero tolerance to violence. Being yelled at, sworn at and emotionally beaten down as they tried to convince me to surrender my intellect to spirit went well beyond the boundaries that I've set within my life. I'm looking for healing and balance, but bullying. My physical body is supposed to find an equal and balanced partnership with my spiritual body. All four aspects of what makes our life possible on this planet is supposed to find balance, cooperation and equal partnership, not some master/slave relationship.
So while many people in my life are reeling from my standing up and saying no to such behaviour, these kinds of efforts must also take place with every single incursion into our sacred space. The state and ALL the people that participate with it have found ways to use legal systems to justify incursions into our own personal space. They will even claim to have jurisdiction to major sections of our medicine wheel, when in reality they have none. They even try to trick people into contracting that authority and jurisdiction or feel like they have no say in the matter.
When somebody enters or impacts our sacred space with out being invited, following protocol, ceremony and making offerings, those incursions are violent, unjustified and morally reprehensible. This happens when spouses engage in covert or overt violence against one another, corporations using violence to kick people off the land so that they can gain a right of way for their projects, pollution in the air, water, food, medicine and the land. It happens every single day within the halls of power in the worlds governing bodies.
I'm going to be forward here by suggesting that nearly every single encounter we have with one another, Mother Earth and all life on this planet violates the sacredness of others. When we approach another being, what would it look like to stop, ask for consent, make an offering and treat that being with the upmost honour, integrity and respect that we can muster? What if we started treating one another as if we are approaching holy ground of the most sacred temple in the universe?
In my view, all life on this planet has a medicine wheel to represent it sacredness. No government on this planet has the authority, power or jurisdiction to make any claims or demands on any of them. Nobody on this planet does either. Yes, it is a great pain in the ass to suddenly ask for permission, negotiate the boundaries and work on protocols for all interactions in our life. We are suddenly deeply constrained to ensure we don't violate others and we may not be able to do what we want and that has significant implications. But when we do honour others, we find peace, prosperity, joy and love as we start to respect and honour one another at levels we never contemplated before in our lives.
This must start within, since we are the authority and have all the power to explore who we are, what our boundaries are going to be and heal ourselves so that we can find the courage to stand up and say no when crossed in any way. When we do that, then we will find ourselves being intimately aware and familiar with the sacred space of others and working hard to not violate their boundaries either. For those who have not figured it out yet, it is our duty to respect them, even when they have not figured it out for themselves yet. To take advantage of others who have not walked the path yet would violate spiritual law!
We ask the plants, animals, water and even the air we breath for permission before we consume or use them. They will volunteer themselves, but only if we honour their sacredness and follow proper protocol and ceremony. We must do the same with people in our lives and around the world as well. Our actions impact the sacred space of others all the time. Imagine a world where people were consciously aware of just how much we impact others and took steps to honour those sacred relationships? When approached with respect, honour, ceremony and treated as being sacred, I too would be willing to make sacrifices for others.
The astounding point to all of this is that we are all responsible for our own sacred space. I get to choose who enters that space and what they do or can say within that space. I get to choose who I kick out of that space should they violate the terms and conditions for being within my own personal space. I also don't owe anybody an explanation or justification for it either. I will choose to do my best to not violate that which is sacred in others.
NO means NO.
Imagine how our relationships would look when we are all empowered to stand up and say no to others who are being disrespectful, abusive or violent. Imagine if it did not matter whether they were a stranger, spouse or even some government thug with a gun, uniform, office or piece of paper. I am the king of my domain and that kingdom is within me. I am the highest authority with all the power granted to me by Creator.
I've said no to a lot of people, even here on this blockchain. I've said no to a lot of people in my community and tribe too. I do this to make a very clear point. I'm not going to tolerate violence or shitty behaviour from anybody! If you violate the principles of honour, integrity or love, then I will confront you. If it continues then you are out of here! You don't get to choose whether it was write or wrong. You don't get to choose the definitions of words or argue legalities.
NO means NO and if you want a relationship with me, there are the terms.
Like bumper cars in life, we live bouncing against one another without really contemplating these kinds of issues. We justify treating others like animals because legal systems say we can. That is bull shit. Time to stand up and start figuring this stuff out. Say no to violence, no matter who they are or what type of uniform they wear. So no to abuse, theft, murder, genocide and all the behaviours that tarnish and disrespect the sacredness of our spirit, body, mind and emotions!
"Yes, it is a great pain in the ass to suddenly ask for permission, negotiate the boundaries and work on protocols for all interactions in our life. We are suddenly deeply constrained to ensure we don't violate others and we may not be able to do what we want and that has significant implications. But when we do honour others, we find peace, prosperity, joy and love as we start to respect and honour one another at levels we never contemplated before in our lives. "
Ding ding ding!!!!
Another great post. Sharing on fb as well.
This is a very important post for many to read. This is the way to change the world in a non violent way.