In this life's many twists and turns I have been about a bit. Today at lunchtime I had popped out for a swift sandwich when I heard a gravelly voice with a cockney accent behind me.
You ever woke up in the mornin all twisted an 'ard...?
Now, such random foul mouthery from a stranger is normally a punching in the neck offense.
Instead though, I turned with a big smile on my face.
And the years melted away.
The new millenium had just dawned and my band was touring up the north of Scotland. We had released a single and had attracted some attention. As a result our manager had gotten us a support slot with a fairly famous Britpop band.
They had recently recruited a new singer and were touring small towns to re-connect with their fan base. Of course, we were all too eager to snaffle up such an opportunity.
Our first gig with them was in the small town of Inverness. I believe it is now a city. Which is rather comical in itself given that it is the size of a postage stamp.
The gig itself was fantastic. Hundreds of enthusiastic people bouncing around to our tunes prior to the big act themselves.
Afterward we gathered in the VIP area, our souls aflame. The drinks flowed, people crouched in corners over tables scattered with talc.
Being a younger version of my world weary self. I couldn't quite believe the band that we were sitting, snorting and cavorting with were truly famous. They were media celebrities and they didnt give a monkeys uncle who saw them snort any random thing of any random surface.
The night pressed on. Soon the action was centred in the singer of the bands rather large hotel room. Hour after hour of shameless hedonism.
Finally there were four of us left, the famous band's singer plus the guitarist, myself and John, our band's drummer. I was chewing at my own face so hard I looked like a deranged dalmation.
For a moment the world stopped whirling. The guitarist of said famous band, excused himself from the room, something about seeing someone who had a thing.
Myself and John smiled, whilst gently frothing at the mouth.
Look at us, in a hotel room with a famous singer, piles of drugs and endless mountains of booze. We have made it!
The singer looked around, then he looked at us. His breathing deepened. He grabbed his crotch intently and fixed us with a steely eyed gaze
Lads. You ever woke up in the morning, yer cock in yer 'and, all twisted and 'ard?
To demonstrate what he meant he grabbed himself tighter and twisted his crotch. He leered at us both.
Av yer? Go on, av yer?
His eyes gleamed like headlamps.
I looked at John in abject terror. He looked at me.
We ran.
Back in the present, me and John exchanged hugs, sat and laughed about our Inverness adventure. Obviously we had to confirm to each other that in all the intervening years neither of us had ever woken
all twisted an 'ard.
@meesterboom "Now, such random foul mouthery from a stranger is normally a punching in the neck offense."
I think that there needs to be a local official to propose this as a totally acceptable response in certain situations, not unlike the one you presented.
Awesome post!
Thanks man. I agree, some circumstances merit exceptional action!! ;0)
Haha, hope he didnt twist to hard though! XD
I try not to think about it!!!!
"The singer looked around, then he looked at us. His breathing deepened. He grabbed his crotch intently and fixed us with a steely eyed gaze". This sounds like the singer in my psychobilly band. Great story! Resteemed and upvoted!
Hehe, are you from London? You never know!!! Cheers man!! :0)
Holy moly I am laughing my ass off! I have often felt like punching people in the throat but I'm a nice girl, I am. LOL Ah, memories...if you can actually remember them, did you have a good time? Something to think about. ;)
Hehe, well there was a distinct lack of detail to it all except for that bit at th end which is indelibly etched into my mind forever!!
Keep that throat punching in reserve for when its really needed :O)
All the bloodletting and throat punching is reserved for the fiction writing. The voices have not escaped my head yet. LOL
Never let them escape except through your writing!! It's a decent into madness from there!!
Love a meesterboom story!
Cheers dude, not quite as jokey as the normal but it had to be told!
restimed , upvoted : ))
Thank you very much!
Pills, booze and no girls? You gotta be kidding me...lmfao. Good post.
Haha!!! Oh but there were!! That however, is s different story!!!
Gotta love your stories. what software do you use for editing your photos? They always look cool.
I use android apps! About four different ones. My favourite are pixlr and PicSay pro :0)
thanks I will try them too :)
Definitely check them out. They take a bit of getting used to, well picsay pro does but its worth it
crazy story! I was thinking about writng a poem again. But I think I´ll pass :D
Hehe, can you find a poem within you to suit the occasion!!!
Sure but would have to tag it nsfw :p
on second thought. Maybe not ... :) I could probably write something one could understand in different ways.
I was thinking that!!
Sorry, dude, not gonna resteem.
though, "I don't care who y'ar, that there was funny."
Resteeming ain't mandatory!! :0)
Love it, you are well and truly back :-)
Lol, Cheers man. I am back in almost all ways!!
Another thing I can add to my list of things I have never woken up with: twisted and 'ard...
I think we can all be glad that we haven't. I mean, twisted... WTFZ!!!
I think I may actually have a friend that had that happen once...spent the night in surgery...and from what he told me, afterwards there was nothing 'ard about it for a while.
I wish I hadn't read that lol!!!
I can't take it back now...the blockchain has it!
Damn that blockchain!!!! lol
Excellent story dear friend @ meesterboom, many years ago I was a sound player of several bands, had my own equipment for that reason was hired by various bands, had a console behringer 32 channels, I understand those who tell me I also had to spend mine Thank you very much dear friend for this story.
I wish you a good night.
Well met fellow sound man!! A good night to you my friend too!
Oh wow! I knew you played a mean ax, but I didn't know you toured with a band before! That's so cool :D All I've ever done was played in garages. You're a man of many talents, Boom. No wonder you ooze creativity!
Inverness? That's the same place Jared has a mansion in @dreemit's Renewal story haha I keep reading it as In fairness for some reason though.
I was at a conference in La Coruna in Spain years ago (back in my Aberdeen days) and the Pogues happened to be staying at the same hotel. While we were checking out, one of them came down to reception and asked it he could get a grilled cheese sandwich sent up to his room. Talk about rock and roll!
Ha, that's just plain wildman rock and roll!!!!
I didn't comment yesterday, mainly because when I come to your posts I don't like to be in a hurry. I like to be sucked into the world of the boom. And yesterday after running around and buying wine I also went to my brother's show.
Forgot my fecking camera though, pissed as hell over that one, particularly since it is one of my favorite towns, on the canal with lots of trendy shops, restaurants and bars and I so rarely go since it's over an hour away.
Ah well, it forced me to truly to take a break and live in the moment without an agenda ;)
Good to know, about how you wake up and all...haha!
Now on to your animation :)
Aw that's rubbish about the camera. So, there is something to be said for just enjoying the moment without steemit bubbling away at the back of the mind!
Dafuq? It sounds like he was packing some heat in 'em britches!
I think he was, we were genuinely terrified we were gonna be on the receiving end of a purple billy club beating!
Hahah, Yeah, you could end up with Mushroom shaped welts on your forehead or even worse!
YEEEEEEEEK!!!
I love them punches :)
you were in a band - now that's truly amazing!
The best punch is a neck punch! Add they say somewhere maybe..
Yes indeed, it was quite a wild ride for a number of years!
2nd is more effective I think :D
I can definitely imagine it :)
i upvote you and please upvote my posts thanks
Thank you, I will at least check you out :0)
That's why I love steemit ! Discover stories like you :)
Cheers mate!
Different but entertaining
Thank you, it is a little different from my normal posts!
great post thanks for sharing
A pleasure, thank you for reading!
nice post @meesterboom.
Well you know what they say...
;0)
Seriously cool story!!!
Thank you!! It's a fond, sort of, memory!!!
That's crazy one! lol
:0D
O you make me laugh - you have a gift with words. Keep it up
Glad to hear it, thank you!
Well that sounds like a situation. Who wouldn't run? It is good to laugh at such situations.
And run we did, like the wind!! Cheers for reading mate :O)
that's a crazy story
I liked it
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