The man quietly walked into the bar, approached the bar section and almost as if in a trance pulled out a gun and shot the man eating with the wife. He shot the man five times. The soft pop-pop sound was dwarfed by the heavy rock sound coming from the gigantic speakers. The man had a surprised look on his face but the wife was frozen in shock as was everyone who witnessed the scene. The rest of the late diners continued eating and talking, oblivious to the incident that just unravelled.
Source
Looking at the scene, a bystander would have thought that the man's wife was also shot judging by the amount of blood on her white blouse.
She sat still for some seconds which looked like entirety. Then out of her lungs came the most piercing scream ever. It rose above the beats coming from the gigantic speakers but the sound of her scream sounded louder to people outside than the diners and drinkers inside.
The DJ was forced to momentarily remove his earphone and look around. When he saw the screaming woman and the blood he turned off the music. The woman was still screaming. People oblivious to what just happened started scrambling through the exit. In the melee, the assassin quietly put back the long silenced 9mm Beretta PX4 Storm Compact into the specially designed suit gun harness and walked unhurriedly out of the cafe.
As he reached the car parked about some 100m away, his phone rang. He picked it and said,
"Done. Just the way you ordered. Eyewitnesses, wife and everyone saw it happen."
He listened to the voice on the other line.
"Yes, I have sent the message, no one would dare look into your affairs. I need another passport and 50 large."
He listened some more to the voice at the other end of the line.
"Yes, boss. I guarantee you, no one would poke their snout where it don't belong. If anyone does, just say the word and I will pop them for you free of charge," the gunman said.
He listened again.
"As you wish boss. I did not take pictures. But you would soon be watching it on TV," said the gunman and hung up.
As soon as he hung up the call, he looked ahead and saw the flashing lights. The police have arrived. But as usual, late for the twenty-seventh time. This is getting old, he thought.
He bent and lowered himself on the car seat and banged the door shut. He was about to turn the ignition when he noticed the ignition wire seemed to have been tampered with. He paused. His thin lips parted revealing his tobacco-stained teeth in a mirthless smile. The smile made him look like a hungry hyena starring at two little rabbits caught by some twine in the bush. He quietly opened the car door leaving the ignition key in the ignition.
He hummed his favourite song from childhood, Anything You Can Do, I Can Do it Better. I can do everything better than you. As usual, he couldn't resist the part that followed so he said aloud, "No you can't. Yes, I can."
Then he extracted his wallet from his hip pocket with an exaggerated care and brought out one crumbled $50 note. He walked towards a dark alley where he spotted the person he was looking for - a youth with unruly hair, injecting some liquid into his left arm.
"Hey mate, care to make some money?" He asked the man with needle-riddled spots on his arm.
The man looked suspiciously at him and said nothing. His attitude suddenly changed when the gunman brought out the folded $50 and waved it in his face. The reaction was immediate but nothing on earth would prevent him from shooting up whatever was in that syringe.
"What would you like? You need company?" The drug addict asked with a leering grin.
"Oh, not that, I'm a man of the collar, I want.."
The drug addict cut him off:
"Oh, nothing to be ashamed of, even the clergies come here every once in a while you know... to look around." He winked drunkenly at him.
"Just something simple, I have a problem with my legs. I can't seem to walk the 100m where I parked my car. Can you help me bring it around here? I'd pay $50 for your troubles." he begged, his face, a mask of discomfort, not that the meth head needed it.
"Are you sure it is your car?" Suddenly the man appeared to not be as foolish as he thought.
"Of course it's my car, see the driving licence here with me. You can take it, compare it with the plate number when you get there."
This explanation seemed to convince the man.
"I am no fool, you'd have to pay me half now and the other half when I get back."
"Fair enough, here is $25." He counted out $25 and gave him.
He stretched out the needle riddled hand and collected it.
As he walked towards the car, the gunman moved a little more under the shadows and watched him intently. It took him about 5 minutes for the addict to get to where it was parked. He entered the car and started it.
Nothing happened. Well, he thought, I just wasted $50. His phone was ringing. He picked it. The number was hidden.
"Please! Please!! Do not enter the car. Do not enter the car! Dylan never planned to pay you. Instead, he rigged the car with explosives that would kill you." The mystery caller dropped the call. Who the heck was that? He wondered.
The car was now about thirty feet now and he could make out the toothless grin of the drug addict. Then it exploded in every direction and there was nothing but the frame of the car.
Source
The blast wave threw him some good twenty feet away. It hurt him badly. He touched his lips and it was bleeding. He managed to stand up and surveyed the tattered crap that was his vehicle.
Dylan. He thought. The man who he had just killed for, wanted him dead. He patted his suit and his 9mm is there. His eyes bloodshot he checked the remaining bullets left in his gun. Ten was still there. It was not enough, he picked some extra bullets from his back pocket and reloaded. His thoughts filled with vicious rage for Dylan. He limped towards the car park, his mind has only one image; a bloodied Dylan lying dead in a hail of his bullets.
"Twenty-eight," he snarled as he limped on.
The End.
Authored by: @greenrun
Click on the coin to join our Discord Chat
In the bottom of the page type: adsactly-witness and press vote.
Use small letters and no "@" sign. Or, click here to vote directly!
Thank you!
What I like the most about the story, and what the readers should notice if they want to understand what is alluring in this story - is that a main part of the story stays "hidden" from us - why was the man assassinated? Who is that assassin? Why did the boss want him dead? Why is the dead count significant?
That's what makes the story so enjoyable - you are not constricted to a definite detailed story - you are provided with a good frame and you should let your imagination fill the gaps with whatever pops up.
I am now reminded of a series of books I read when I was young - in certain pages you had the option to skip to a few options of the continuation of the story and sort of great your own entwined and tangled plot. It was fascinating as a child but today I prefer stories like this one you just read as it lets you have countless plots.
Thanks for an interesting and imagination provoking story!
Nati.
Thank you for the insightful comment, the plot could go anyway if you want to develop it into a longer story.
I get this feeling that you've played Shadowrun before. At the very least, you know what I'm talking about. I like the style of writing. It's similar to how I picture putting stories together in my head. It almost motivates me enough to write a short story/scenario of my own....almost. Maybe life needs to give me a dose of serotonin to put me in the mood for it. Or, maybe I should just stop being a bitch. Hmm, yeah, the second one makes more sense.
No. I have not played such a game. Go ahead and drop those thoughts in writing. Thanks for reading.
GREAT POST!Help me Follow x Follow From venezuela
Awesome!
May I ask who wrote it?
I did. Thank you.
are the best
it's good!
Great Post!. Interesting Story. I want more of this. Keep it up
hi @sonia132
I just joined steemit and post my introduce.
Warm regards :)
Vote back https://steemit.com/airhawk-project/@tegasweet/if-you-are-not-from-africa-you-are-missing-a-lot-of-cultural-practices
Great Post!. Interesting Story. I want more of this. Keep it up
Have a read of mine, let me know what you think..
Great story! I used the same picture for my story a few days ago... weird. If you liked this story, you might like the ones I posted!
https://steemit.com/story/@jadegreene/short-fiction-surviving
https://steemit.com/fiction/@jadegreene/short-story-the-waiting-game
Good story. I have just written one myself and decided to see what was already out there. Mines based on my own experiences. Is this one? Would be real interesting if it was.
always cool stories, thanks for sharing.
Thanks for sharing. BTW. Very nice website design. I'm gonna put some funds in dether.io.
Nice Story. You should try to make a long story about the first 26 Numbers:-)
Thrilling 28.
A story that draws into WoW and drifts together!
I keep breathing while reading :)
you are really very successful in this matter. maybe you should start writing novels :)
I would be your first reader!
congratulations
That was a nice compliment. Thanks a lot
Wow wow wow!!! I need more of this, what a story... pls do you @greenrun write novels? I want to subscribe, you are amazing and an awesome writer, thank you and bless you for sharing, we are even because i m also doing what i love doing which is singing that is what my blog is meant for, i ll be most grateful if you visit my blog please, you wont be disappointed @greenrun... tank you for sharing, i m anticipating for more of this thank you
that crime story made my day at work thanks!!
now I can go hum "Anything you can do, I can do it better" all day, I dont want to thank for that tho.
Couldnt speed read it in like 2 minuts like some of the others could sadly.
It is all good. I'm glad you read it. Thanks a lot.
This was awesome! Instantly gripping and I love the themes that you explored here.
I write short stories, also. They're more like surrealist anecdotes, to be honest, but I really appreciate your style of writing. Keep it up!
Thank you.
And in the end the reader is left wondering :
Who on earth was the mystery caller who ratted out on Dylan and why?
What's Dylan gonna do once he finds out he's been ratted on?
Will killing number 28 ever take place or will the killer go straight to his grave ?
Ok that's about it ... HOw about part 2? :)
Still thinking of whether to let it end or continue. Thank you for reading.
Please do!
I think you should continue it...
It is really captivating....you write well 👍
Thank you @ponmile
Wow, nice story. I'm excited he picked the call despite that the number was hidden. That saved his life. He would have been exploded to ashes with the car. Some of us don't answer calls with hidden number. I've learned. Thanks for the story.
You never really know who is on the other line, do we? I think its good to answer all calls.
Very interesting story
Exactly @greenrun. That I have learned from the story. Thank you.
Damn. That must have been a really awful situation he just experienced.
Such an amazing fiction
Thank you for reading.
Wow, nice story. I'm excited he picked the call although the number was hidden. He saved his life. He had exploded to ashes with the car. Some of us don't answer calls with a hidden number. I learned. Thanks for the story.
The call came late in a way, but Dylan is a suspicious man I must confess :)
are you a professional writer? you followed all rules of writing like pause, suspense, love
I'm not a professional writer by any chance. Thanks for reading.
This was good fiction. Although, I noticed that there were punctuations missing. Some grammatical errors too but all in all this was good.
Would love to know what the assassin will do to Dylan when he finds him.
Like the suspense that the unknown caller brings. Who is the caller?
I wish I know who that caller was and what Dylan would do. Thanks for reading.
lol... you wrote it? Nice work! You better come on and spill your little secrets!
Hope this is fiction,one funny lesson I have learned from the story is that store your money in your crypto currency wallet instead of the real wallet...Besides that I like old western cowboy movies...the Magnificent 7 acted by Denzel Washington is the latest I have watched....Thank you for making my day
Thank you too for reading, crypto rules :)
Very nicely written. I really like that you gave us some explicit details (the gun for instance) but mostly left the scene to the reader.
Thanks for a great read. And I'm sure I'll be humming 'Anything you can do...' all day long.
I'm glad you like the story. Thank you for reading.
Excellent story, @greenrun! I enjoyed it.
Thanks for reading.
It's really nice story
Thanks to share with us.
@alexKARKI
Your imagination will work while reading every bit of sentence in the story, as if you are reading or even watching an assassin related movie. You took our imagination to a higher level. Thanks for the wonderful story.
Thanks for the kind compliments. We appreciate every reader's comments.
So you are the writer? how come the story posted with different username? ;)
He is the author and also signed now. Somehow the signature got lost in transfer. All ADSactly blog posts are written by our members.
I hope someday I can share something that might be nice ... :) @adsactly
Me too I love to share something someday. @adsactly thank you for the answer.
Amazing story
Upvoted and resteemed
Nice story. I do appreciate the fact that you took out time to think of something and share with others. For that sir, I upvote you.
Great Post!. Interesting Story.
Keep sharing....
Wow..... What a story. Thank you for sharing. This could be script.
Reading your story was like watching a movie! Very well colored with just the right words. I'm hoping that there will be more soon.
very good writing, makes me want to write too, but whatever power I do not have the ability as good as you
Hey, nice story line, it is interesting. I am following you, can you follow me @ xtophercruzeu thanks
Good
Nice story @adsactly. I do appreciate the fact that you took out time to think of something and share with others. I upvote you.
Amazing post i like your post have a nice day.
woo woo. excelent
A very moving event, that's how our life is now, no matter what, we have entered a period of life without existence
you're clearly very a success in this be counted. perhaps you need to start writing novels :) i might be your first reader!..........................:):):)
congratulations :):)
@Upvote
Congratulations @adsactly!
Your post was mentioned in the hit parade in the following category:
wow amazing photo sir ..Upvote and Resteem your post ....
http://gif-finder.com/oh-wow/
@Resteem
Sooooo, I know that this is going to ruin my Steem reputation and I am fine with it. Did anyone proof read this before they posted it? There are syntax errors and grammatical errors throughout and I thought the expectation was to post only quality content. That's not to say there isn't a lot of positive things about this piece of writing, because their are. It just isn't professional quality and needed to have been properly proof-read and edited before posting.
Love it, awsome story.
Great story, nice plot. Thanks for sharing.
Oww great story you catch my mind man.
Suspense filled!
You got me glued all through.
Well done !
This is a very amazing story, I pray to grow up to be like you in the nearest future, I admire your artistic expertise.
I love your post! It's what I like to share with my followers! Im Following you and I also Resteem it!
The post is very amazing, very menginfirasi begi we all stemian ,, guide us so we can like you .. regards steemit