Now that 50 rotations around the sun is quickly approaching, it's strange to look back on certain periods of life. Through grade school and Highschool, things were going pretty well. On track is the right term, I suppose.
Somewhere down the line, about a year or so after Highschool graduation, the train started to derail. While so many of my peers seemed to adjust well to College or whatever else they had planned, my path became uncertain.
College Tuition Was An Issue
It wasn't supposed to be a problem, but that's just how things worked out. As I entered my sophomore year in Highschool, we moved to an investment property.
My parents won highest bid in an auction for a prime piece of land. It was over an acre and sat on a hillside overlooking a lagoon. Past that was the freeway, tressles, then the great Pacific Ocean.
One drawback about the purchase was the old house built on the property many years back. It was run down but we managed, knowing my parents had bigger plans.
Building The Dream House
Working with the city, my parents were able to acquire a lot split. They then went to work building a Victorian style house on the new lot. By the time it was complete, I was a senior in Highschool.
At this point, moms and pops ended up putting both houses on the market. The real estate market had taken a big dip during the time it took to build the house. My parents were strapped for liquidity and needed to sell one or the other.
Interest came first in the old house. A family wanted to fix it up and it had a good amount of backyard left from the lot split. So we moved into the miniature mansion my parents had built.
My father promised he'd find a way to afford my tuition at the University of my choice, but I knew how much he already had on his plate. So I took the Junior College route for a couple few years, a couple few different times.
Studying Music Without A Clue
My baseball days had come to an end by the time I entered college. That change marked the last real bond that held my relationship with my father together.
I turned to another thing I was good at and really loved to do. That thing was music. Though not really exceptional at any one instrument, I knew how to sing. At JC, I studied music theory and continued to learn the keyboard.
The truth is, it was during this time that I got lost. I had no idea how to transition into what my life was supposed to become. But I sure did feel the pressure. That pressure (or at least sense of it) turned into anger towards my dad. I no longer cared to spend time with my family.
Partying Is A Solution
Somehow through all my self treatment and abuse, deep down I knew this was the case. Partying eases the pain and covers what's really wrong. It works very well to get by.....until one day it doesn't.
This went on for years, even a few after I became a dad. Back in those days after Highschool the Internet was something I barely knew about. I gave Internet Business a try years later after I was fired from my job at Trader Joes.
Let me tell you, it's really hard to make money online when you're a bilthering drunkard. That didn't last long. The partying had to stop and did shortly after.
Fast Forward To 2015
At this point, I hadn't touched a drink in four years and life was hard. Being sober doesn't make life easier, it makes it harder. Because of my past experience in retail management, I was placed in positions of authority too soon.
I lost jobs without partying at all due to stress and life changes. A good friend offered employment moving heavy machinery, but the hours weren't enough to pay the bills.
It was this reason that brought me to building my first website. A friend had got me onto Facebook a few years earlier, so I wasn't a complete Internet idiot. Building that website through online lessons sure taught me some legit skills. Writing is one I brought along and have developed since.
Current Day
After so many years of self imposed turmoil, life isn't hard anymore. It definitely has its days, but I have learned to deal with them much better than before.
Working online isn't something I do to try to put bread on the table either, which removes most of the related stress. It's much easier to write everyday without all that pressure.
After five years of putting in hours online, I know what it takes to be successful. It's a huge commitment! And it's one I hope to fully invest my time and efforts towards as I grow older.
I've worked until I bled for most of my life but I can't do that much longer. It's a good thing I got started online five years ago. It's like the saying goes...
"The best time to have started an online business was ten years ago. The second best time to start one is right now." - Anonymous
Thanks for your time and as always...
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Those transitions can be tough - glad you have found your way and seem to be living a happier life now!
Thanks. My wife has to take a lot of credit for the happier life. At least, when I'm behaving myself. Which at least is way more often these days than it used to be. 😁😁
That's a nice little life review!
Happy almost 50th, if I've read that correctly, I'm not that far off myself!
@tipu curate
Upvoted 👌 (Mana: 14/21)
Yeah I forget so I counted this morning. I'm a couple months away from 48. Only 2 more years? Shoot, that might as well be yesterday. 🤣🤣🤣
Ohhhh. I can so relate. When I sobered up my life got measurably better. Not a single bit easier, but better.
I had a fallback position when I sobered up. I was a journeyman heavy equipment mechanic. That brought in enough money, but it's a young man's game so I've spent the last near 20 years (since 50) in other pursuits.
I'd have been better served to stick with the innerwebs, but I had other ideas :) Now I'm no more than supplemental on line, but I KNOW that it can be done. Good on you for starting and sticking to the process earlier rather than later.
Thanks for a really great reminder of the great fact. My life is pretty good and I'm happy with it. That's the really important thing.
Thanks BigTom. I'm with you. I was considering getting my class A a few years back so I could haul heavy machinery. Then I remembered how old I was already and rethought that position. 👍
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm glad to know that finally you find some ease. I congratulate you. ♥️♥️
I'm sitting in the same blank spot in wich I don't have any clue on what to do with my life. Hopefully I'm seeing in the distance some doors that can be opened.
We'll see...
A big hug! ♥️♥️♥️
Thanks. I could always use a big hug. It took me a long time to get to a place where I could enjoy the journey. Even on a daily basis, I think I know what I'm supposed to be doing. Then things change and I find other people have me doing something completely different. So....I don't think they really know what's going on either. 😁
Thanks for sharing your story. Yes, when one reaches 50, it represents a time to reflect more deeply on what has been done and what is missing.
Hehe. So I counted it out from the beginning this morning. I'll be 48 in a couple months. Might as well just start saying I'm 50. 🤣🤣
'Just do it'-NIKE
Yeah it is about commitment, working it and finding the stuff that you also like to do for it. What a story man, and I guess a lot of us can relate to parts of it!
One of my favorite things about people. We can be from completely different areas of the planet and still find a part of someone else's story that we can relate to. Thanks for stopping by. 😁
Thank you so much for sharing this information about you and your journey. It was an enjoyable read. Same As me, I learned writing through the years of online presence, Its not at the best but its safe to say its somewhere.
That's good to hear. I kinda just write and publish on HIVE. Sometimes I have to go back and edit where I leave words out or I miss an awful spell check courtesy of my phone.
Writing professionally, I use tools that asses my writing and then often do several edits. 🙂👍
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