Speaking my mind, you do. Lily just came back after two months with her mom, and has three rather big cavities in her teeth, one being in a permanent teeth. And that after spending quite a bit last year to try to remedy a lack of minerals when the teeth were forming. She will probably have stained teeth for life, not for her choices, but her mom's.
I can't say that out loud, though. I'm just glad that she's living with me now, and I can actually do something about it. I rather swallow those comments and pay than risking upsetting her mom and taking Lily away again. Hence, we're now practicing how to correctly brush teeth again every evening, and how to floss. And we had it down so nicely before she went. It's frustrating.
But I try to be the better of the parents you picture. To give her the right spoon, the one that will server her well and sustainably. So, I put the frustration aside, smile, teach and lead by example. I'm brushing my teeth a lot longer now. And I started flossing again, though I hate it and my teeth are super strong and never needed it. Well...