One line from an economics seminar I attended recently reminded me of something I also wrote long ago, “ Life isn’t necessarily expensive, style is.
Once again, I am being reminded of an important lesson yet easy to forget. These days with endless social media scrolls, we are bombarded with different lifestyles that go just beyond our own physical borders. We see other people’s lives that we don’t normally get to see. While that is a long standing fact, its emotional impact on us can be quite different. It does not matter how many times we’re told of that, we’re carrying the little device in our pocket that constantly bombard us with things if we’re not careful enough when curating our experience.
I’ve been guilty of it myself.
As someone who likes and enjoys finer things in life, I often find myself captivated by those whose lives are so well-curated into perfection. Everything they have is everything I ever dreamed of but that was just the prerequisite before something even bigger robs me of my own contentment.
The thing is, I move between different economic and social realities so fluidly. I can spend a day living next to nothing to living around people who spend $2000 /day like it’s nothing. I also visit houses that are almost falling apart and live there but also walk through an extravagant mansion somewhere that I would never expect to exist. And, most importantly, I know the people behind those lifestyles and what they do for a living. For someone who regularly gets an exposure into these, life gets a bit messier. It’s like your perception of life is sort of skewed and you start to measure your life against whichever reality is in front you.
So, actually social media doesn’t do that big of a damage but its my current social life and surrounding is.
For the past 8 months, I have been surrounded by people who never feel like it is enough.
"That's because you don't have children or a family to take care of. You don't have to think about these things." That statement ends the conversation before it even begins. It discounts the fact that I also have responsibilities.
Without my income, my mother and I would struggle to even afford basic needs and while it is not the same as a parent raising children, I also need money and need to think about not only my own future but also my mother.
But what I do know is that in times when I really struggled, I still know how to be thankful.
The circumstances I had did not stop me from curating my own life and make it aesthetic. While I know the rest of the house might seem like it’s barely holding itself together, I have a space on my own that feels like me. Yet eventually, I learned that it’s less about the place but the people we surround ourselves with.
Today, at my own desk, I think about how traumatizing these past 8 months have been. The constant exposure to people who never have gratitude in their conversation and no balance between ambition & gratitude makes me feel like I lose footing in my life.
I escaped darkness and It took me years to finally find a sense of contentment. I don’t need a toxic environment to ruin it for me. I had the choice to choose and I’ll choose it now with every consequence I carry and bear.
 | 𝘊𝘦𝘮𝘺 (𝘰𝘳 𝘔𝘢𝘤) 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝖼𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗀𝖾𝗇𝖾𝗋𝖺𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 & 𝘤𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘶𝘳, 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘮𝘣𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘣𝘢𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘶𝘥𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘬. 𝘏𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘨 𝘳𝘦𝘧𝘭𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘶𝘴𝘵, 𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘺, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘵𝘩. 𝘠𝘰𝘶’𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘴, 𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘩𝘯𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘺, 𝘱𝘰𝘱 𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦, 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘱𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘰𝘱𝘩𝘺; 𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘩𝘦’𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘶𝘱𝘴 𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘦. 𝘚𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘸𝘪𝘮𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘤𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘴. 𝘍𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘯 𝘏𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘣 𝘢 𝘤𝘶𝘱 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘴. |