I think I finally figured out what bothers me about those posts that are about trauma/abuse survivors and people with health issues, usually aimed at women, that are always like, "You're a warrior queen Goddess fighting your battles draw your sword you are strong and a fighter defeat your enemies and wear your crown!!!" usually with some fantasy art of a woman warrior attached. They have never sat right with me, but I couldn't articulate why.
It's the warrior/battle metaphor.
We do it all the time in speech - "fighting to survive," "battling cancer," etc. But I think it's wrong.
First of all, making it a warrior/fighting metaphor is externalising an internal process. Basically, it makes it so that you are fighting yourself. Whether that's fighting mental illness (your own brain), or the survival mechanisms you learned during a traumatic time (that kept you alive then but are harming you now), or a disease that is causing parts of your own body to behave in ways that hurt you, it's still YOU. That's your brain or your kidneys or whatever, not an outside enemy that you have to defeat. You don't want to defeat your brain. You want to heal your brain.
Healing doesn't defeat, it integrates. That might mean growing some new neural pathways, that might mean learning to cope with a new reality such as if you had something amputated and now you have to adjust to that, that might mean your immune system containing a threat but keeping that information for future use, a little piece of the thing that hurt you so it can remember what to do should it return. When we are hurt and we get a scar, that scar is now a part of our skin. Trying to excise the scar instead of integrating it will only make the wound worse.
If we have survived some trauma or illness, we're going to have some scars (visible or otherwise). Your body recovering from that and learning from that experience isn't a battle, it's a meditation that makes you wiser as you integrate the information. You don't draw your sword and hack at your brain; you figure out what your brain needs to recover and live in a healthy way again. You nurture it, just like when you have a cold and your mom makes you chicken noodle soup to nourish you.
Our society loves violent war metaphors. "The war on drugs" made things worse, not better - just as fighting your own body isn't healing. To heal, you need rest, and nourishment, and gentleness, and time. You need to process and integrate what happened. You need to change what needs changing, and letting go of what needs let go. Like I've had to let go of teeth that were broken and infected, and my mouth had to heal and grow new flesh to cover up the places where they once were; I couldn't fight my teeth into submission or do battle with cavities. It didn't return me to the same state that I was before - I didn't grow new teeth. But I'm healed; my mouth no longer hurts me.
The fighting/warrior metaphor for illness and trauma is the exact opposite of what it really needs to be. We aren't warriors fighting PTSD like it's an enemy we can vanquish; we're students or artists or inventors learning what to do with this new thing in our lives to make it useful instead of harmful. Like upcycling trash into treasure. Take that plastic thing that you don't know what to do with and instead of letting it break down into microplastics polluting your environment, create a beautiful sculpture with it. Take this terrible experience and instead of letting it fester in your mind forever, create some beautiful art with your life. It isn't a battle; it's a metamorphosis.
Absolutely, it isn't a tough battle neither too easy to heal your pain. But still you can do it if you keep getting out of that wound/thought
It is really a tough battle that we will keep fighting day by day
Healing from a pain is something difficult cos you gotta look away from so many things but it is really needed. It’s better to heal than carrying a pain which will be a burden to you
Interesting thought...I am thinking that these words fighting/battling are being used to mean battling with the disease by attacking it with medicines or procedures, or making changes just so a sick person will eventually get better. And the healing process, that's probably what you call it metamorphosis because the person feels better than when he/she was ill. 🤔😊 Just a thought... maybe because I think that sickness and diseases are enemies. ✌🙂
I think a lot of people agree with you.
❤ have a wonderful weekend! ☕🌞
I'd always say coming to terms with a situation is better than fighting it.
Hello @phoenixwren
You have been losing all curation rewards by upvoting comments from the accounts
"biyimi"
"precab"
"yellow74"
as we remove all the rewards from these upvotes.
The account belongs to a well-known scammer (identity thief, plagiarist, spammer, etc).
What? I think y'all are mistaken. I don't know Yellow, but the other three are people I've had normal interactions with in comments and on Waves. And they've won Ecency awards for activity. Their posts look normal to me?
OK I looked through your last report and followed the links to check out what you were talking about and in comments there was a bit of a thread where you said "There is a list of accounts that is circulating that is used to hit with comments on posts which are authored by lucrative comment upvoters. The farmers focus their comments on these authors so they can receive guaranteed upvotes on comments." ...so you're saying people are hitting up my comments section because they know I upvote comments and that's a problem?
Accounts "biyimi" & "precab" belong to one person.
"yellow74" is a different user but received the same list of accounts to follow and comment on from "biyimi".
I am sure that you have noticed that most of the comments on your posts have been coming from the same group of accounts.
They exclusively comment on accounts that guarantee upvotes, not just your account. They have a list of dozens of accounts that they comment on daily while ignoring the rest of the other Hiveians.
He keeps sharing this list with others, so others can join to farm the same list.
So just checking - you removed rafzat, so her name has been cleared?
Oh, I understand. And I didn't realize biyimi and precab were the same person.
We are not the same person @phoenixwren
I have made myself clear over and over again several times. They will not listen
This is not true. I have myself clear over and over again in their discord server that we are not the same person.
We are different people. Biyimi just happened to introduce me to this platform. You can read through my introduction post to confirm that.
I am been accused for what I didn't do and I have made it clear to them in their discord server but they will not listen.
I dropped comments in communities I follow also. They didn't talk about that?
I replied comments, they didn't talk about that?
I dropped quality post, they didn't talk about that also?
And I have also made myself clear that it is not what they are thinking by me those list of recommended users. Of course there are other people I comments on that didn't upvotes me but I still comments on.
What else do you think I should do.
I am innocent of all this false accusations.
@hivewatchers
@phoenixwren
I'm sorry! All I've ever heard is that things can be straightened out in their Discord, but if they aren't believing you I don't know what to do. :( Are you two local to each other, do you know each other in person? Or other Hivers in person? Maybe others can vouch for you? Or take a photo together?
We've got lots of people who are families or in-person friends and I'm sure they follow a lot of the same people and groups.
We heal as time goes on and move on. Life always love on I strongly believe that