Growing up. Can there be a more universal theme? It's something we all share, those of us who were lucky enough to grow up.
How did we get here? Is it ever done, this process of growing? For me, it never seems to stop. I am not who I was ten years ago, or even a week ago. Each day I learn, change, try to grow into what I understand from my experience.
How far back should I go in response to this prompt? The earliest years, when growing was most important, are not part of my conscious memory. Though, stories do exist about that time in my life. There's one, for example, of when I came home from the hospital. My mother was sick with pneumonia, I've been told. A local farmhand was called in to be my caretaker. Did this break in parental bonding matter? Was my growing up affected?
I can recount here the history of my life, but the tale is always colored by what someone related to me, or by what I remember. As we all know, memory is porous. Impressions flow in and out of the tender membrane that separates what happened from what we believe may have happened.
Here is a photo of me as a baby. At least, my sister says it's me. But she is only fourteen months older than I am. How would she know? Let's accept the identification as reality. Why not? The baby picture is fine, and serves the purpose.
It wasn't a happy childhood, and yet there are happy memories. Are they real? Are happy memories essential to growing up? Do we create them, or tailor them to suit our needs? I'm not sure.
It doesn't matter too much if my memory is accurate or colored by fantasy. The idea serves my narrative, my life story. After all, this story belongs to no one else, so who can complain about my approximate grasp of 'reality'?
Heavens, in my lifetime the concept of reality has completely changed. Now we have alternate realities, parallel universes, wormholes. Who will pin me down to recreate a reality I am inclined to forget, or reject?
So, growing up was a fairly typical challenge, typical in the sense that I didn't know where I was going, or how to get there. I stumbled along. Didn't you?
I do remember some specifics, many of them tinged by irony. I couldn't read for a long time, then became a champion reader. Reading actually became the foundation of my academic success.
I couldn't keep up with my siblings as they roamed over local forest trails. And yet, in grade school I became a champion runner.
See what I mean by irony?
Here is one of the houses I lived in as a child. This I remember, so the statement is as true as any claim can be.
I affirm one truth from all of it, from growing up: Nothing is fixed. I am here now, in a certain state. Tomorrow, will I be? And if I am, will I have grown? Will there be more irony? I suspect that is the case.
My little essay on growing up may not have taken you where you expected to go, into the nooks and crannies of my quotidian existence. Perhaps you feel I should apologize. But why?
This is where my life has taken me. This is the clearest way I can explain what 'growing up' has meant to me.
A Note to Readers
This essay was written in response to the Inkwell nonfiction prompt #7. Nonfiction is a rather new initiative for the Inkwell community. We used to welcome only short stories. After a bit of thought, we considered that people might want to express themselves in a different way. The Inkwell is all about encouraging writing, so we invited nonfiction writers to join us.
If any one of my readers is inclined to write fiction or nonfiction, check out our different prompts. We have monthly and weekly fiction prompts, and now we have a weekly nonfiction prompt.
Take the plunge. Get it off your chest, whatever it is you have been hankering to say. If the prompts don't inspire you, then write what does. Please, though, read our rules and observe them (especially the rules on violence).
I hope this essay wasn't too irritating. It wasn't a charming narrative. It didn't take readers down memory lane. It was kind of an exercise for me on the idea of growing up.
Everybody, please have a peaceful day and do something creative. That always lifts my spirits.
Credit, Flower illustration: by @muelli, from the LMAC Image Gallery, LIL.
I am fascinated by your way of thinking, there is so much here that serves me for everything.
Thank you! I try to be honest and direct when I write (also when I talk😀). Maybe that's what comes through. Plus, I have lived a very long time.
I appreciate your comment.
It seems like it will never stop inside of me and I am learning and changing every day.
It's good that it won't stop. We can't stand still. Move forward, and grow.
Thank you for stopping by and commenting, @oretenklaus
I meant, we may grow up in every second passing by as long as we question enough and are qualified to answer them by our own.
I was looking for a story somewhat in your past, however, it's not like story is the most effective tool to write out your thoughts. Since this essay proved it could too.
Thank you for that comment, @sapphireissafy. There are so many stories we can all share from our lives. I couldn't think of anything so special that it would be worth sharing. But my point of view, that I thought might be interesting. I'm very pleased you found it so.
Have a great, peaceful evening. Thank you for reading.
Greetings @agmoore, I like your post and there is something that got me thinking and I agree with you is the part you say:
"As we all know, memory is porous. Impressions go in and out of the tender membrane that separates what happened from what we think might have happened."
Without a doubt I think it is true, Thank you for sharing a part of your life experience and no doubt you are also right in saying that every day we are in a learning process, well that is what I have understood and I liked it enormously since very little I had thought so, I am grateful that through your words there taught me to be a little more humble than I already was. Thank you @agmoore
By the way you were a beautiful baby, I say that with all due respect and I liked your pictures.
Hello @pjpavan,
I'm glad you pulled out that section and that it meant something to you. I feel that way about experience, and especially about memory. Very often we can relate an event from our past and if someone has had the same experience, they will remember the event differently.
I can tell by your writing that you are still striving to learn, as I am. It's a great thing to see. In another year, if we are both on Hive, we will be different, and probably better:)
Thanks so much for reading and commenting. Have a great evening.
I got together with my brother recently after some considerable time and we got to talking about our parents, now deceased. He remembered many of the incidents that I did but differently. It was so frustrating to have nobody else alive to support my version.
Of course, I know my memory of the events to be absolutely correct and I have no doubt that my brother, 5 years my senior, has lost his senses.
😂
I've no doubt you are absolutely right. I know I always am😁
life takes many turns, we never know where we will end up. surprises gives us life.
Hello @malos10,
Thank you for that comment. I agree, surprise is life. You never know what is coming next.
Hope you have a great evening.
I liked the way you narrated what it has been and is like for you, growing up in your life. Have a nice evening
Thank you very much for reading my piece, @rammargarita. I just finished your piece and loved it.
Remembering all those years ago, and sharing: it's good to do.
Have a great evening (it's quite late here).
Great write up. Good to learn about how it takes you to grow up, it isn't easy not to keep on growing up but we gotta keep on moving
Hello @officialrosh1,
I agree, "we gotta keep on moving". How boring life would be if we didn't.
Thank you very much for reading my blog and for commenting.
The essay was great, growing is a life long process.
Thank you, @amiegeoffrey for reading my blog. I appreciate your kind words. Growing is a lifelong process.
I loved reading your take on growing up.
Well said! Who could ever even attempt to disentangle one's memories from all the influences that surrounded them? The 100% accurate truth is probably not quite so interesting as the version your memory has framed up.
Thank you for reading my post, @jayna. It didn't follow precisely the model of describing a memory, or incident, but this is how the prompt affected me. It was a great, irresistible prompt.
I really appreciate your feedback.
I love your way of expressing yourself through writing. No doubt growing up takes a long time, but it's worth every single thing we experience.
You are so kind! Thank you. When I write, especially an essay like this, I don't think of what I should say. I just say what I mean. And then I do a lot of editing to make it neat.
It's gratifying to know this method works, at least for you.
Have a wonderful day and thanks for stopping by.
Everyday is an opportunity for growth. I may not as good in some days and ways, but somehow those circumstances will eventually give us valuable lessons as we get older.
The mistakes I've made, the things I regret (yes I do regret things) have taught me more than what I did right.
Thank you for reading and commenting. Have a great day, @volleyren20
And that goes the same to me.
This is lovely and I found myself giggling at you being ironic and your Sister saying it's your picture😂😂... Thanks for sharing.
You know how older sisters are, even if they are just a little bit older 😄
Thank you for reading and for your very nice comment. Have a great weekend, @balikis95
😂😂😂 yea I know has my Sis done that also.. It is just funny 🤣🤣🤣.
You are most welcome and enjoy your weekend too 🤗🤗
Memories are chaff in the wind. You’ve put your finger directly on the pulse : memories are porous. OMG, that’s so profound and so true. You are so, undeniably, brilliant that it’s difficult to imagine that I my lungs hold the same air as yours. It’s difficult to even comment on this post, because you’re a scholar and a scribe. Hehe 😉
Hello dear @itsostylish
😄 I have to laugh. I am so inept. At one of the many part-time jobs I held years ago, a co-worker asked if I always had trouble learning😆
A trip down memory lane didn't work for me, not for this prompt but I did want to respond. Thank you very much for reading, for commenting and for your kind words.
For real, I grew up a bit reading this @agmoore .
The concept of growing is quite inexhaustible, and sometimes scary.
Something's I find funny right now may not be funny as i grow up, and I live for the laughs now😂😂
Hello @seki1,
You have quite a good head on your shoulders, I can tell from your writing. Live for laughs--why not? Life can be pretty grim. If you can smile and find joy, you have a gift. Hold onto that.
Thanks for reading and commenting.
Thanks😂😗♥️
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